Traveling on the road can be stressful. Sometimes too stressful. One doesn't need non-road situations to make them more stressful. Someone should mention this to Bill Gates. I am presently doing a road trip with limited amount of time to check out property. This is in a remote part of the country that consists of a lot of trees and hills and not much else. The towns that are here are Boonievill...
Responding to the growing complaints about Hell's sketchy wireless coverage, Satan issued an internal memo this week pointing out what he believes should be brutally obvious to even the most narcissistic damned - you're in Hell. The tone of the me...
Dyson's latest simple, but desperately needed invention has created a tsunami among electronics manufacturers: anti-tangle cables. This solves at a stroke the problem plaguing all modern houses: cables that spontaneously tangle up with each other and...
24 hours ago, I reported news of a romance. However, circumstances have changed, and I am now saddened to reveal that the Tweedy/Bieber romance which we broke the news of has turned sour. Staff at Boujis had informed me that the pair "were smitten...
Blueberry Hill, Ontario, Canada - Plagued by numerous class action suits, Canada's leading cell phone giant has instructed its lawyers to settle out of court. In a dramatic announcement, spokesperson Briar Patch revealed that an amicable settlement h...
BT has today announced the installation of the first Wi-Fi point on the moon.
The Women's Institute are considering whether or not to take legal action after one of their members, Fiona McMac, was approached by lawyers for The Internet & IT Generally demanding she hand over her nickname of Wi-Fi.
A shocking new theory concerning how wireless signals cause damage to people emerged today. Alastair Phillips, chairman of Powerwatch (an organisation dedicated to safeguarding our children from cancer-causing rays) unveiled his discovery during an i...
A New York City man was beaten by police, when he refused to disconnect from a WiFi network he was using to surf the Internet.
Omaha, Nebraska - Infomercial culinary giant Ronco today saw a twenty-seven percent gain in stock price after news of their latest offering, the "Fry-fi", wireless cooker and mobile phone, reached investors. "This is a huge advance in time-sa...
London - (Ass Mess): Compensation payments totalling literally billions of £££ could be payable if teachers are proved right that wireless technology emissions are cooking pupils' brains and turning them into violent knife-mad killers.
Cyberspace - (Ass Mess): Terrist hackers will soon be able to spy on US military operations over the internet as plans to launch a new cyberspace communications vehicle from the International Space Station were released today.
Washington DC - (Ass Mess): FEMA, the Department of Homeland Insecurity's emergency division, has proposed a national satire wireless broadband network to give the emergency services a jolly good laugh when the Bush Administration is unceremoniou...
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