Fungaza, Italy - A new shroud of Turin – now in Fungaza – has been found. Like the Turin shroud, this shows a bearded man lying prone with hands over his genitals – so as not to offend the Lord when dead – with holes piercing his hands and feet and a…
London - Barking resident Mrs Hilda Ricketts has spoken of her dismay after a Pancake Day mix-up with her husband's ashes saw a Turin Shroud-like apparition pop up in her blini. Apparently she mistook a jar of the late Jock Ricketts' cremated rema...
Dorking Magma - A writer from the Spoof website was in shock tonight as a strange oily apparition began, er, manifesting all over his £4.95p doner kebab wrapper.... just as he turned 54 years of age! At first glance the trompe l'oeil looked a dead...
Each year, millions of people -- including Pope Benedict XVI -- view the Turin shroud while it's on view at various locations in Europe. The reason for its popularity stems from the fact that it appears to bear the image of Jesus' face. But identi...
London - (Benny & The Jets News): An Eve Of Atonement Cumulo-Nimby formation has been spotted sizing up the Pope's rostrum in Hyde Park. Located close to Tyburn the vigil arena is slap bang in the middle of London's famous gallows site where c...
Iconic graffiti artist, Banksy has astounded the world by revealing that his great, great, great, great, great grandfather, Giovanni de Banco, a 16th century Italian painter was responsible for making The Turin Shroud - probably the number one wonder...
It all seems to be going a bit bonkers in Turin, home of the Shroud, Juventus, Torino, Fiat and Silvio Berlusconi. Or was that Milan? Anyway, there's been a right bit of argy-bargy between the Illuminati - the enlightened ones who really rule t...
Cyberspace - (Jesus Wept): A Spoof writers' discussion about the Pope bowing before the Turin Shroud on Sunday has descended into chaos. Theories that the shroud depicts the corpse of Jacques de Molay - last Grand Master of the Knights Templar - a...
CREATIONISM, TEXAS: A famous scientist working on the Shroud of Turin, who initially believed it was fake has now stated: "I absolutely believe that this is the original piece of cloth that was used to wrap the body of Jesus. As a result I have...
Washington AC/DC - (Grateful Dead Sea Scrolls): Miniscule pollen traces on Barack Obama's birth certificate have been identified as Alaskan Matanuska Thunderfuck strains. The discovery flames an already bitter Birthers' argument that the plant mat...
The Pope, has shocked the Vatican, by ordering Susan Boyle to sing for him and the Turin Shroud fashioned into her Evening Gown. The Pope ordered his minions to his Papal bed after having a bright idea, like goggled-eyed Velma Dinkley does in 'Sc...
London - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): The Vatican Orifice for Miracles and Portents has certified Jade Goody's wedding dress as miraculous garb after Turin Shroud-like images began to appear on its silken folds this week. This started a frenetic int...
Scientists in America have revealed that they have made a big mistake.
London - (Reuterus & Infalible Mess): Ex-UK Prime Monster Tony Blair's youngest brat Leo was conceived via cutting edge IVF treatment using DNA extracted from blood droplets found on the Turin Shroud hoax.
Turin, Italy - (Satanic Mess): Italian newspapers have reported that a gang of occupational pranksters has targeted a church at the heart of one of the Vatican's greatest ever miracle scams and "stolen a vile (sic) of holy fluids as well as...
Scientists and image analysts studying the Shroud of Turin have announced their findings during the Holy season of Easter. Guisseppe I. Justwowerk-Ferdapapa, lead scientist on the two decade study revealed that the DNA and the Image analysis confirms...
Hollyweird April 6 -- Titanic Director, theologian, & Geraldo-wanna-be James Cameron will release an Easter-eve featurette on You-Tube that proves conclusively that Jesus of Nazareth and Osama Bin Laden of the Riyadh & Geneve Bin Ladens are brothers.
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