New Key Performance Indicators are to be introduced for service sector workers, following shocking reports into negligence and slack working practices. One mail delivery worker, operating in the small Yorkshire village of Greendale, has an appall...
A UK postman who killed a cat on his rounds is not quite like his TV colleague, Postman Pat, who loved his pussy?. The "friendly" postman was doing his rounds when Tiddy the tabby jumped into his basket of mail hoping for a stroke, instead the eld...
England manager Fabio Capello is leaving the England post after the World Cup in South Africa for a make or break career in Hollywood. The 63 year old is in negotiations with the makers of a new biopic documenting the life of Postman Pat and produ...
Postman Pat today demanded a postal vote in the General Election and also demanded a vote for his black and white cat because he says its got more sense than the brainwashed electorate. Pat explained that he is a busy man and he delivers all the l...
They were dancing in the streets of Greendale today celebrating the news that local legend, Postman Pat had been given a payrise after months of negotiations with his employer, the Royal Mail. The hard working postie had just finished his round at...
Pat sat drinking tea with his cat Jess on his lap in Mrs. Miggins' living room. He was taking his usual thirteenth break of the morning as, of course, part of his job as a postman was to chat with all the people in Glendale. 'Well, Pat', Mrs. Miggins said, passing him another slice of carrot cake, 'I expect you'll be wanting to get back on your rounds soon'. 'I suppose so', he replied, yawning...
Postman Pat and his communist sympathiser colleagues have threatened to hold the country to ransom next week by refusing to deliver mail. Businesses up and down the country are fearful of the economic consequences, and are having to resort to othe...
After running out of fresh excuses to strike, MP's have been left infuriated with the Royal Mail's leading union over the reasons behind their currently monthly strike. It appears the unions were balloted last week because of the way Postman Pat i...
We're hearing that Noddy walked out on long time partner Big Ears last night following a blazing row over a party attended by the hitherto inseperable couple where it was alleged that Noddy disappeared with Postman Pat and Bob the Builder for a drug...
Following many of the recent changes to the Postal Service, Postman Pat, or now Pat, has decided to become a Racing Driver.
My days with Pat usually start at around 4pm, when he wakes me with half a pint of milk and a Kipper. I don't like Milk, or Kippers, but I am a Cat and can't communicate my dislike of this food to the fool.
News just in from our Polish children's TV correspondant has told us that an investigation is to be launched as to whether the cult TV children's drama "Teletubbies" promotes homosexuality.
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