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Funny satire stories about heart attack

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Funny story: OAP replaces leaking tap in the Bog and is now recovering in hospital with a heart attack

OAP replaces leaking tap in the Bog and is now recovering in hospital with a heart attack

Erith, Kent, UK: Replacing leaking taps under sinks can sometimes be a harrowing experience for OAP's and people with 'Jurassic' knees. However, calling a plumber to do the job is even more harrowing after they send their invoice! It is a common f…

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Funny story: Racial Filing Suspected in Cardiac Arrests

Racial Filing Suspected in Cardiac Arrests

Highlighting the dramatically higher incidents of cardiac arrest among African-Americans, a report published by the ACLU posits that racial profiling may be at play - specifically, the ACLU speculates that police officers are disproportionately targe...

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Funny story: Daily Mail reader has heart attack arguing on a forum

Daily Mail reader has heart attack arguing on a forum

Daily Mail reader, Carl White, had a heart attack last night while arguing his position on a forum when he came up against people with facts. "Normally," said wife of fifteen years, Brenda White, "our Carl would stick to the comments section on th...

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Funny story: Police Question Nina Dobrev About Dead Man!

Police Question Nina Dobrev About Dead Man!

After a late night party with some friends actress Nina Dobrev (The Vampire Diaries) came home, got her flashlight from her car as she saw that her light was out by the door and the streetlight didn't show enough light for her to unlock her door.

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Funny story: Wife Wanting A Baby Making Husband Work Hard At It

Wife Wanting A Baby Making Husband Work Hard At It

Sandy Breatcher of Greenville, Illinois says that she wants her and her husband, Roger, to have a baby so they must work at it a lot! Meanwhile a tired, hollow-eyed Roger says that he too wants them to have a baby but trying 3-4 times a day can re...

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Funny story: New Zealand women dies after being a Cola-aholic!

New Zealand women dies after being a Cola-aholic!

Drinking too much of a well known fizzy, dark brown drink, not Guiness, can kill you but only if you consume ten buckets a day as a women did in New Zealand. The reason why she drunk so much of the stuff was very simple; New Zealand is the most bo...

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Funny story: Cardiac arrest? There's an app for that

Cardiac arrest? There's an app for that

One of the major causes of death among men aged between below twenty-five and above eighty-two is cardiac arrest, more commonly known as a heart attack. Nearly one in every one people will at some point in their lives, die of a stopped heart. With...

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Funny story: Soccer star Fabrice Muamba's miracle recovery is due to his belief in Voodoo!

Soccer star Fabrice Muamba's miracle recovery is due to his belief in Voodoo!

After suffering a horrendous heart-attack during the footy match between Tottenham and Bolton last weekend the soccer-star, Fabrice Muamba, is now gladly recovering. It seems he was clinically dead for 78 minutes and it is a miracle that he is now r...

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Funny story: 73-Year-Old Newspaper Editor Dies After Sex With 22-Year-Old

73-Year-Old Newspaper Editor Dies After Sex With 22-Year-Old

The editor of the Oregonian Organ's Editorial Pages for many years has died of cardiac arrest following having sex with a young lady he has apparently been helping through college for some time now. The young lady told police officers that Dwight...

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Funny story: U.S. Epidemic of Restaurants Living Up To Their Name

U.S. Epidemic of Restaurants Living Up To Their Name

People all over the country are exercising caution before selecting a destination for an evenings dinner after a man's heart attack at The Heart Attack Grill starts a pandemic of restaurants living up to their names. Reports from all over the countr...

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Funny story: Man Dies After 'Wrong Version' Song Resuscitation

Man Dies After 'Wrong Version' Song Resuscitation

Tragedy struck today on the streets of London, after an American tourist suffered a heart attack and was then finished off by a well meaning teenager trying to administer first aid. The victim, Barry Goldfinch, 47, had complained of feeling unwell...

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Funny story: NBC'S "Biggest Loser" celebrates 180th show without a heart attack

NBC'S "Biggest Loser" celebrates 180th show without a heart attack

The hit TV show "The Biggest Loser" recently passed a milestone by airing it's 180th episode with no fatal incidents. A spokesman for the show said he "was sure someone would have had a stroke or heart attack by now, or just strangled one of th...

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Funny story: Canadian Heart Association Pleads for Stanley Cup Win

Canadian Heart Association Pleads for Stanley Cup Win

Several sitting board members of the Canadian Heart Association well aware of increased incidents of heart attack during highly stressful events, pleads with the NHL Officials Association to make the Stanley Cup Finals "Canadian Fair". Taking the...

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Funny story: Cryanair charge for use of resuscitation paddles

Cryanair charge for use of resuscitation paddles

Under fire budget airline, Cryanair, have come under more criticism after a passenger nearly died on their flight back from (an airport within seventy miles of) Alicante. Paul Dearheart, 42, was travelling alone back from visiting relatives in Spa...

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Funny story: Heart Attack Rates Up In England, U.S.

Heart Attack Rates Up In England, U.S.

For some reason, the World Health Organization has checked and rechecked their numbers and they have concluded that England has the highest percentage of heart attack victims in the world with the United States coming in a close second. "So far we...

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Funny story: Clinton Tests New Stint with Chili Dogs

Clinton Tests New Stint with Chili Dogs

Confident in his doctor's skills and in the stint technology used to strengthen the walls of his arteries, Bill Clinton reportedly made an unscheduled stop on his way home from the hospital, for a three-pack chili dog combo and a side of cheese fries...

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Funny story: Non-Smokers Reap Benefits of Smoking Ban, Spoofer Kicks the Habit

Non-Smokers Reap Benefits of Smoking Ban, Spoofer Kicks the Habit

TARLBORO COUNTRY, U.S.A. - Just how harmful is secondhand smoke? This has been one of the most lop-sided public health debates of the early 21st century, but a new study suggests that passing laws to curb secondhand smoke can yield a big payoff - a d...

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