DUCK DUNG, Alabama – (Satire News) – The “Turdhead” (DJT) who said that COVID was a hoax, and he won the election by 54 million votes, and that the Boy Scouts of America were conducting a “Witch Hunt” on him has now surpassed even his most stupid, id…
(NOT EDITED) Flies are pests, full stop! Maybe not as bad as mosquitoes or gnats, but they are still a damn nuisance! However, a French fly, not a Spanish one (really irritating), got his own back whilst pestering a farmer's wife in her kitchen. T…
(UNEDITED) It seems there are certain things not even a corona pandemic can 'put an end to' because Germans, who generally have their house in order, have allowed one of their favorite competitions to take place! The annual "Fliegen Klatsche' (Fly…
Eifel, Germany: A cat has been discovered with a quite unique phobia, and has been sent to the Robert Koch Institute, Munich, for further examination. A farm cat, non-domestic, named Anton, not from Tyrol, was seen twitching, blinking and running for…
A man has revealed how the Rat Trap Glue product his wife bought at the market to snare a family of mice living in his roofspace, can also be used to get rid of the nasty hazard of household flies - in their zillions! Moys Kenwood, 56, whose wife...
Evolutionary scientist Geoff Murd has finally been recognised with a blue plaque for his work in genetics in the 1920s. Long after Lamarckian evolution had been disproven, Murd decided to try to prove it was actually true by a series of extraordinari...
A man has revealed how, minding his own business eating his breakfast this morning, he became aware of two houseflies that had landed on the rim of his plate, and were indulging in a bit of 'the old in-out'. Moys Kenwood, 56, had finished his Corn...
The commonly-held belief that insects have uncommon intelligence was comprehensively dispelled today, when a fly that landed on a child's plastic toy, not only did not have a 'sixth sense', it didn't even have the sense it was born with! * The hou...
Welcome once again to the complete and utter waste of your precious time that is 'The Wonderful World Of Uninteresting Animals', and this week's subject, after many requests from readers, is the housefly. It was going to be the Kestrel, but isn't...
This is the beginning of a series of articles on the animal world, the world where animals live. Billions of wonderful and diverse creatures live in the animal world, and we'll be looking at some of the most uninteresting of them - or, the least inte...
Living in a hectic world in which many pride themselves on being so busy that there’ll be “no flies resting on them” has made for rather a tough row to hoe for Nashville fly, Freddie Diptera. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m busy, too,” said Freddie. "I'...
Despite being castigated by most people, those of us who indulge in occasional fly tipping are usually unrepentant. Unless you have done it yourself, it is often difficult to comprehend the thinking behind it, and my purpose in submitting this article is to highlight the positive aspects of fly tipping and try to give some insight into why anyone would do it. The first time I ended up fly tipp...
A hospital doctor could lose her job after she stared at the partly-open flies of a male patient sitting opposite her on a packed train. Dr Ava Peek was disciplined after the patient, Ivor Beegun, complained to the Head of NHS Vigilance and Ancill...
Windows made from plate glass should be outlawed, says a man, after claims that a fly repeatedly flew into one. The fly, who cannot be named because it is nameless, became trapped in the Bangkok apartment of Moys Kenwood, originally from Hull in E...
There is nothing more embarrassing for a man than to go to the lavatory and discover that his zip has been undone all morning; and the reasons for the giggles and pointing becomes apparent. "Many a time I've thought I've said something witty," sai...
Scientists have finally come up with the answer to the question that bugs householders every summer... Why can't flies get out of the window? As everyone knows, in the height of summer, flies and bluebottles can get into your home through the n...
The Seattle Art Museum opened today with few patrons waiting at the doors, uneventful and relaxed. Josh Littlebear, reception desk guard, was hoping for more activity so the day went fast. Ten minutes later the front doors were jammed with two tour...
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