BOSTON – The Massachusetts state legislature has just voted 91-9 to ban showing The Sean Hannity Show throughout the entire state. The move came after Hannity made one of the most idiotic, asinine, dipshit comments of his entire 58-year life.
NEW YORK CITY – The Coronavirus is now having an impact on the sports world. The commissioner of baseball, Robbie Manfred, said that MLB will be implementing a ban on the tradition of high-fiving. The practice first started many years ago, when a...
President Trump's attempt to ban Cinco de Mayo backfired after three separate circuit courts blocked his executive order: Now this year's celebrations promise to be even bigger in defiance of President Trump. After being rebuked by the courts, Tru...
In the face of President Trump's threatened ban, stocks are soaring for Mexican brewers, as well as distributors and sellers of Mexican beer. Reached by phone, Molly Snipes, CEO of Molotov distributors in Denver, talked to this reporter about the...
Donald Trump called for a ban on Mexican wolf re-introduction programs that have been in place for decades, programs aimed at restoring the wolf to it's historical place in the southwestern US's ecosystem. The Mexican wolf, canis lupus baileyi, ha...
Twenty six year old Hunter Young of Boulder Colorado doubts that Donald Trump will be president in 2017, but like many in the US, he's planning to make the 2016 Cinco de Mayo celebration a blow out, just in case. Talking to a TS reporter, Young sa...
In the Texas border town of Kriegsville, Atticus Luna sits on the front line of the US trade and culture war with Mexico, a war articulated by presidential candidate Donald Trump with his call for a ban on Cinco de Mayo and Mexican beers. I hunke...
Boston-Families throughout New England yesterday defiantly posted "Je Suis Frostie" signs in their windows and on the snowmen in their front and back yards, following an anti-snowman fatwah issued by a Saudi Arabian imam, Sheikh Mohammed Saleh al-Mun...
A Gateshead grandmother has been given a life ban from her local rugby club, Wearside Werewolves. The 76-year-old prop-forward was shown the red card for going down on her opposing hooker during a tense game against local rivals Toon Tykes. For...
A Gateshead delivery driver has had his frying pan reduced in size from 16 to 10 inches diameter. Aluvaf Ryup, 33, had been driving whilst still holding his 16-inch pan. In court, magistrates duly considered his pan, which had been set aside wh...
Super League was rocked yesterday by the banning of former international star Ivor Nutherwon for the rest of the season, after his ear count was over the limit. It comes after a sixth-month investigation, led by UK Ear-Count (UKEC), the body which...
Despite being banned from the recent Cannes Festival, Danish film director Lars Von Trier has promised to continue making films. Von Trier was prohibited from attending the festival after commenting that he "sympathised with Hitler". The direct...
Dundee United midfielder Morgaro Gomis has been banned for 3 games and fined a month's wages after being found guilty by an SFA tribunal of assaulting a player and leaving the scene of the crime. The tribunal found that on February 19th at Tynecas...
Due to a problem with his hearing aid, the French Interior Minister, Monsieur S. Mel Garlique, has banned a host of people with names sounding like burkha. Following a giant international misunderstanding over the traditional black full-body dress...
In a bold attempt to improve its image, Bud Selig, Commissioner of Major League Baseball, yesterday announced that, effective immediately, spitting has been banned from the sport. "Little old ladies throughout America have long complained about th...
The Dubai Ministry for Sex and Alcohol shocked British couples when it announced that there was now a total worldwide ban on British couples having sex. This declaration follows the trial of a male and female British couple who got a 3 month pris...
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