CLEMSON, South Carolina – There is sadness in the halls of Clemson University, as the school’s beloved mascot has come down with the Coronapalooza virus. A student who was in charge of taking care of the cherished tiger, named “Paw-Paw,” said that…
THE BRONX, New York – The assistant director of the Bronx Zoo has just issued a news bulletin that eight of their big cats have tested positive for the Coronavirus. Spencer Piano told the reporters, who had assembled in the zoo parking lot, that t...
NEW YORK CITY – A 4-year-old Malayan-Himalayan tiger named Nadia Comaneci is the first animal in the history of animals to get the Coronavirus. Bronx Zoo Assistant Director, Pixie P. Pinzer, said that Naddie first exhibited signs of the C-19 after...
An actor in a TV drama involving a man who sometimes changes into a white tiger, had his face gnawed off last night, despite the fact that, in many countries, this would have been before the 9 o'clock watershed. Thing is, in Cambodia, there are ma...
Toronto - A local animal trainer for the Toronto Zoo suffered severe injuries when his tiger, Meeka, turned on him during a training session and gnawed his arms off. According to fellow workmates, the trainer, Peter Dawson, 38, routinely whipped Meek...
It's official- Cee Lo Green is not returning as a judge to The Voice this year because of an issue with the star's contract. It is no secret that the singer of the hit "forget you" is an animal lover. Cee Lo likes to bring animals onto the set of...
David Cameron today revealed incredible plans to reintroduce Cadbury's Caramel Bunnies back into Britain so we can all 'take it easy'. The Prime Minister announced the plans from a chocolate river, built by poor people who had worked for no money...
After the uproar at Copenhagen Zoo when the zoo owners took an inbred giraffe, killed it and then fed it to the lions, management of the zoo have unveiled new plans for future animals that are surplus to requirements. "We don't see what the proble...
AUBURN, Alabama - The number 4 ranked Auburn Tigers were not the least bit intimadated by the likes of the top ranked Alabama Crimson Tide as they upset Bama 34-28. With the game tied and with just seconds to go the Tide tried a field goal. It was...
A Spoof reporter skilled in tiger talk dug up the story behind the story. The tiger has no idea why everyone was so excited. "Good grief, I just went in to take care of business; isn't that what everyone goes to the restroom for?" the tiger...
ST. PETERSBURG, Russia-Tiger Woods could become extinct in 12 years if companies he's still a spokesperson for fail to take quick action to protect their image and step up the fight against infidelity, global celeb experts told a "Tiger summit" S...
The local police chief in Zanesville, Ohio, the site of the wild animal escape and slaughter has announced that half of the carcasses have been stolen in the dead of night from the Columbus Zoo morgue. At the present time, no one has been incarcerat...
EL PASO, Tx.--Seri, 3, is currently being held in custody for allegedly murdering Wzui, 6, her intended mate at the El Paso Zoo. Although autopsy results have not been released, sources believe Wzui died as a result of castration by forepaw. Accor...
The earliest New World humans not only may have hunted enormous beasts such as mammoths and mastodons, but they may also have been hunted by ice age Sabre-Toothed Tigers in return, according to researchers at the Smyths Institution and the San Antoni...
Hedge End, Hants - Early reports indicated the beast had been seen 'lying near some Bushes' beside a smashed-up SUV. Luckily police choppers tracked it down amid a breakout of local mass hysteria about a 'club-wielding Elin Nordegren lookalike' pr...
London, UK: After a number of complaints that Downing Street has become overrun with vermin, a big cat is to be brought in to remedy the situation. "We first started to see them around May of last year, skulking around in the shadows, but now they...
It had to happen. No sooner had the news broken of the ladle-wielding wife who beat off a tiger, saving her husband's life, than the stories came pouring in. "Tiger? Huh! That's nothing!" was the general gist, as we sifted through the 113,965 messages emailed to us from darkest Peru, from the top of Ayres Rock in Oz, and all places between and beyond. Having verified these amazing stories...
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