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Funny satire stories about Ted Haggard

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Funny story: Republicans Reveal Low Cost Prayer Based Health Care Plans

Republicans Reveal Low Cost Prayer Based Health Care Plans

Washington DC (AP) Following the lead of Representative Virginia Foxx (Nutjob-NC) who introduced successful legislation to ban any federal education assistance from being used to teach abortion techniques in medical schools, the social conservative a...

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Funny story: Haggard Blames Jesus for his Homosexuality

Haggard Blames Jesus for his Homosexuality

In a stunning exclusive disgraced evangelical preacher Ted Haggard says he was only following the Biblical examples of the Lord Jesus when he experienced homosexual relations. "Find me one, just one example of Jesus ever doing the horizontal mam...

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Funny story: Ted Haggard Pervs Protestants Past Pope

Ted Haggard Pervs Protestants Past Pope

The Catholic Church has only recently recovered from the blows it took when Evangelical Ted Haggard was accused of sexual misconduct with a male's asshole. Until recently, the Church has held a steady lead in perversity, racking up point after po...

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Funny story: Pastor Haggard strapped for cash

Pastor Haggard strapped for cash

Colorado Springs, Colorado - (Ass Mess): Pastor Ted Haggard is on his uppers and strapped for cash. The former evangelical minister is appealing to former congregation members for donations to finance his paranormal studies at the Phoenix Dream Cent...

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Funny story: Falwell's Flock Follows Ted Haggard to New Church

Falwell's Flock Follows Ted Haggard to New Church

In the event of Jerry Falwell's death, many of his followers have decided to follow Ted Haggard to his new 'Church of the Unbiased Pious.'...

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Funny story: A Pastor Haggard moment waiting to happen for worried Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff?

A Pastor Haggard moment waiting to happen for worried Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff?

Pentagon - (Ass Press): Marine General Peter Pace, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, has told a press conference that he considers homosexuality to be immoral and any fag-ass pansy caught on his watch will be stripped.

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Funny story: Mrs Pastor Haggard comforts Senator Edwards' wife

Mrs Pastor Haggard comforts Senator Edwards' wife

Washington DC - (Rotters): Ted Haggard's wife Gay has phoned to comfort Senator John Edwards's wife Elizabeth after TV fag-hag-slag Anne Coulter smeared his manhood on her show this weekend.

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Funny story: Pastor Ted Haggard's Three-Week Total Body Success Plan for Complete Heterosexuality

Pastor Ted Haggard's Three-Week Total Body Success Plan for Complete Heterosexuality

My Dear Megachurch Flock,...

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Funny story: Three weeks of retro-engineering cures Ted Haggard of homosexuality

Three weeks of retro-engineering cures Ted Haggard of homosexuality

Colorado Springs - (ReUterus): Following a three week course of immunization jabs, colonic irrigation therapy, a pilgrimage to the crystal healing waters of the Diana, Princess of Wales Memorial Fountain AND a semi-hypnotic suggestion from Mrs Haggar...

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Funny story: Taxidermists bid to stuff Jerry Falwell and Ted Haggard for new Creationist Museum exhibit

Taxidermists bid to stuff Jerry Falwell and Ted Haggard for new Creationist Museum exhibit

Kentucky - (Associated Mess): The world's first Creationist Museum is scheduled to open in Kentucky next summer along the lines of a Biblical Disneyland cum Jurassic Park hybrid. And central to its awesome array of historically-factual exhibits...

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Funny story: Haggard:"I didn't have to pay"

Haggard:"I didn't have to pay"

Colorado Springs, Colorado - (Associated Mess): The embattled leader of the National Evangelical Association Pastor Ted Haggard has stepped down from his lofty pulpit after hotly refuting allegations that he had to pay for sex with men, claiming he w...

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