Aging has many down sides, and one particular British male OAP has now gone public because of his nymphomaniac wife's demands in bed! The Daily Garbage, a well-known Brit tabloid, latching on to any garbage available as long as it's not Brexit, ha...
On Friday, Spain's foreign minister Marinero Pescador issued a statement implicating that foreign agents from the Canadian province of Newfoundland have been meddling in the recent Catalonian referendum: "Lord thundering Jesus, mi amigos, first th...
Newly unelected (by the people, yes we understand she was elected by the Tory party) Prime Minister Theresa May has had a historic meeting with Scotland's First Minister Nicola Sturgeon today. Admitting that the meeting was "positive" and that "all o...
A new Breakfast cereal called Brexit is causing problems. The manufacturers Cloggies, aware that they should be politically neutral have had difficulties finding a suitable line for selling the product. First of all they wanted to use the slogan '...
David Cameron put it well: 'If you are in then you can provide for the future - if you are Out you dirty your hands, your sheets, your bed.' This make the case for staying in the EU (Erotic Union). Meanwhile Boris Yeltsin the Mayor of London wa...
The systematic addition of chemicals to Scottish water supplies is to resume to keep rebellion levels down. Additional chemical dosing will continue in keeping with pre-referendum Westminster policy, effectively maintaining a docile disposition in th...
Yes, Scotland has No bananas: 55% No bananas. As Katherine Hepburn once said about Fred Astaire, "Ginger Rogers made Fred more masculine." Like Ginger, Scotland made England more masculine. And as former Governor of Texas Ann Richards once pointed ou...
The North of England is said to be inconsolable after polls have indicated that Scotland will be leaving them. A spokesperson for Northern England told our reporter this morning "England will be a funny shape, has no-one thought of that? Also a f...
Up to three Dukes of Edinburgh will be operated by the private sector to cope with the increase in Diplomatic duties in any new Independent Scotland. it was announced by the Palace this morning. However, the process by which this might happen is not...
Labour leader and aardvark impersonator Ed Miliband has announced that the party will not offer a referendum on EU membership if they were to gain power, directly opposed to the current Governments promise of holding an In/Out referendum on the issue...
Cristina Kirchner is reported to have reacted furiously to a letter from David Cameron detailing his proposition for a "Yes/No" British sovereignty referendum on mainland Argentina. The letter, which was apparently intended as an April fool and a...
The Vatican -- New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg is moving to complete a deal that would make him the second Jewish Pontiff of the Roman Catholic Church. "St. Peter was Jewish and he turned out to be the indestructible rock God chose to head his ch...
A friend told me about a week or so before we left that he couldn't quite believe it was actually happening and weren't we concerned about racism. I recall frowning with genuine confusion. It wasn't as though John had ever been one to over-dramatise, that always fell to his wife, Lucy, and even as we had this conversation, she was frantically talking to her mother, advising her where the 'Meni...
Three of the cities that held referendums on the introduction of elected mayors have so far rejected the idea: In Nottingham, 57.09% of voters decided against it. Comment: "It's perfectly understandable really. If the proletariat of Nottingham had to turn out to vote for a mayor, they would have less time for shoplifting, benefit claiming, and also they'd risk getting themselves shot by one o...
AS the debate on the Scottish referendum kicks off in earnest, SNP leader Alec "Fishy" Salmond has issued a stark warning to the Westminster government: "I'll batter those stuck up Tory English c***s!" In a speech to party faithful at the 300-Year...
Proponents of electoral reform were delighted today at the news that after wasting time with stuff no-one cared about like PR or AV or whatever, one of the real issues actually gripping the nation was to be decided by a plebiscite of the whole elect...
(Published 2031) BIRMINGHAM URBEM - It is only one week before local elections in England, and the PR referendum. Both sides of the debate are gearing up for major campaigning for the battle. None more so than the No camp. However, political exper...
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