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President Trump To Join Greg Gianforte's Gym

Funny story: President Trump To Join Greg Gianforte's Gym

MISSOULA, MON. Out on the campaign trail once more, US President, Donald Trump, said he had "nothing but praise" for Republican candidate, Greg Gianforte, who, last year, assaulted a journalist. Gianforte was bothered enough by the Guardian report...

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Do you get it?

Funny story: Do you get it?

A new report published this year by urdata4us has revealed that 50% of people “just don’t get it”. It has been found that most people believe that at least one person in their lives “doesn’t get it”. A similar study counter-acted these claims by sugg...

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"999 What's Your Emer...Ah Fuck It"

A shocking new report has found that over one million crimes a year aren’t even investigated by the police. To people who enjoy stealing cheap bottles of cider, this is great news! But, for those of us who expect our law enforcement to do a semi comp...

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Bird With Big Tits To Be Next Conservative Leader

Funny story: Bird With Big Tits To Be Next Conservative Leader

In the fall-out of Prime Minister Theresa May's dancing debacle in Kenya last month, leading Conservatives have said that what's needed to carry their party forward, and to keep 'in step' and 'in tune' with the Great British public, is a woman with h...

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Theresa May Banned From Entering Kenya Ever Again

Funny story: Theresa May Banned From Entering Kenya Ever Again

In what is being treated as a 'purely symbolic action', British Prime Minister Theresa May has received a lifetime ban from Kenya. May visited the African country in September to try and smooth the way for future trade deals between Britain and Ke...

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Suds ‘n duds op launders Kavanaugh

Funny story: Suds ‘n duds op launders Kavanaugh

With the FBI Investigation ending at any moment, analysts now believe Mr. Kavanaugh's confirmation to the Supreme Court can move right ahead. Given the limitations to the FBI, as with a time-limit of one week, the likelihood is: Candidate AOK.

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Con Conference: Extra Pritt-Stick Ordered For Theresa May Speech

Funny story: Con Conference: Extra Pritt-Stick Ordered For Theresa May Speech

Extra Pritt-Stick has been ordered to ensure Theresa May can only balls-up from speaking shite and not as well as the stage falling apart around her during her speech, ministers say. The previous Tory Conference was a spectacular screw-up for the...

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Fearing Political Tsunami in November, Republicans Adopt New Approaches

Funny story: Fearing Political Tsunami in November, Republicans Adopt New Approaches

THE WIRED STREET URINAL REPORTER KR Schwartz DATELINE: September 27th 2018 Washington, D.C. Fearing Political Tsunami in November, Republicans Adopt New Approaches Feeling the mounting political pressure from constituents over the Senate Judi...

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Judge Kavanaugh accused of expanding the classic “4 F’s” to “6 F’s”

Funny story: Judge Kavanaugh accused of expanding the classic “4 F’s” to “6 F’s”

Mr. Kavanaugh’s troubles continue to mount as this week new accusations have surfaced from a) a new female accuser and b) Stormy Daniels’ lawyer Michael Avenatti. Mr. Avenatti, who also aspires to candidacy in the 2020 presidential election, claim...

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Kavanaugh, Ford and others to undergo “I don’t remember” testing analysis re bio records at under twenty something

Funny story: Kavanaugh, Ford and others to undergo “I don’t remember” testing analysis re bio records at under twenty something

Chairman of the Judiciary Committee, Senator Grassley of Iowa, announced today that additional to testimony next week in the Kavanaugh affair, special memory testing procedures have been initiated. Not the same as lie detector testing, the new mem...

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Brexit Analysis Impossible Until After Brexit, Claims Man Who Only Reads Sports Pages

Funny story: Brexit Analysis Impossible Until After Brexit, Claims Man Who Only Reads Sports Pages

The consequences, ramifications, and repercussions of Britain leaving the European Union cannot, and will not, be known until after the event has happened, claims a man who knows absolutely fuck all about economics. Moys Kenwood, 55, said that, as...

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Stormy Daniels on the President’s appendage in exclusive interview

Funny story: Stormy Daniels on the President’s appendage in exclusive interview

Investigators were able to speak to Ms. Daniels yesterday on revelations that may play a vital role in the upcoming midterm elections. That is,Ms. Daniels has declared there is some abnormality in the President’s physiology, possibly indicating he...

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The Hunt for "Deep Thought"

Funny story: The Hunt for "Deep Thought"

This morning before dawn, the doorbell at my home chimed. When I stumbled to the door, no one was there, but an envelope was laying against my door. I took it into the kitchen to make a cup of coffee before opening it, but curiosity reigned supreme. Inside I found the document inserted below on White House letterhead stationery, emblazoned with a watermark spelling out “CONFIDENTIAL” obliquely...

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Corbyn slammed for not mocking woman who can't dance

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn is facing fierce criticism from across the political spectrum for his failure to make fun of Theresa May's lack of prowess on the dance floor. Corbyn has been noticeably quiet in the controversy which has seen May make...

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BBC's Great British Menu in Hot Water Over Controversial NHS Menu

Funny story: BBC's Great British Menu in Hot Water Over Controversial NHS Menu

One of the BBC's longest running and much loved cookery shows 'Great British Menu' - has been plunged like a pus-covered scalpel - into hot water. The theme of this year's competition, Seventy Years of the NHS has challenged twenty four of the UK's...

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Boris Johnson Truth Serum Reaches Dover

Funny story: Boris Johnson Truth Serum Reaches Dover

Police have issued a warning to motorists that long delays are likely for anyone using the Dover ferry terminal over the weekend, due to a large consignment of truth serum coming through the port for use by Conservative MP Boris Johnson. Alexander...

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Jews Confirm Anti-Semites Are Anyone Calling Them Jews

Funny story: Jews Confirm Anti-Semites Are Anyone Calling Them Jews

Prominent Jews have today clarified what exactly constitutes anti-Semitism following the controversy currently engulfing the Labour Party. Leader Jeremy Corbyn, of tolerance, tea-drinking and hummus-making fame, is facing criticism for being a mas...

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Man Beaten Senseless For Not Having Any Social Or Political Values

When asked about his political and social views, Roger Stanley, 40, responded by saying, "For the past 20 years, I've never really paid much attention to politics or even major social issues such as gun control, abortion, gay rights, immigration, dru...

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Breaking news…

Trump Thinks Deaths at End of Avengers Infinity Wars Were Real

He sends the Secret Service to the movie set of Avengers 4 to do some investigating.
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