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Funny satire stories about Police

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Funny story: Police criticised for arresting celebrity who beat up his girlfriend

Police criticised for arresting celebrity who beat up his girlfriend

Social media users attacked a decision by police to arrest Norbert Willy, the host of reality television show “Let’s Do Lots of Fucking in Public”, for beating up his girlfriend Mandy. Mandy had telephoned emergency services, complaining that her...

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Funny story: Police Facial Recognition Technique Plans Doomed To Failure

Police Facial Recognition Technique Plans Doomed To Failure

The Metroploitan Police have announced that they will use facial recognition cameras on London streets later this year, to identify and catch people suspected of having committed crimes, but, claims a bloke who knows what he's on about, the plan is d...

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Funny story: David Beckham's Son Wanted By Cops

David Beckham's Son Wanted By Cops

When it comes down to newsworthy sports stars, they don't come much bigger than former Manchester United, Real Madrid and England footballer, David Beckham, but the international playboy is in the spotlight for all the wrong reasons this evening, as...

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Funny story: Pick Me Up Before You Sex Offend

Pick Me Up Before You Sex Offend

A Scottish “pickup artist” who refers to himself as Addy A-Game has been jailed for two years for threatening behaviour towards women in the street. Mr A-Game would secretly film himself walking up to random ladies in quiet streets, and running some...

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Funny story: El Chapo's Sons in Gun Battle During 'Take Your Child to Work Day'

El Chapo's Sons in Gun Battle During 'Take Your Child to Work Day'

Joaquin "El Chapo" Guzman was spotted beaming with pride yesterday, when his four sons fought an hours-long gun battle with Mexican police during the annual 'Take Your Child To Work Day'. The gun battle left 13 people dead and scores injured, in Sin...

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Funny story: The Drone Wars

The Drone Wars

UK police have announced a new weapon in the war on “people being a bit of a pain”, with the formation of a new crack drone unit. The unit's primary goal will be to combat the threat posed by the odd drone flying over Heathrow, but will probably...

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Funny story: Customer Refuses To Pay Restaurant Tab Based On Personal Conviction - "I don't believe in the existence of a cook."

Customer Refuses To Pay Restaurant Tab Based On Personal Conviction - "I don't believe in the existence of a cook."

Salt Lake City -A biologist's refusal to pay his restaurant tab has led to his arrest, but has also incited heated controversy in the town of Falls Face, Utah. It is a topic of intense discussion after Paul Ramses, 26, working as a consultant with...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Implicated In Huge Betting Scandal

Harry Maguire Implicated In Huge Betting Scandal

Police are looking into a huge betting scandal in the wake of the England football team's 5-3 victory over Kosovo in Southampton last night, with central defender Harry Maguire being the focus of their investigation. Maguire, it was, who dithered...

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Funny story: Young Black Male Wanted for Unspeakable Sex Crimes

Young Black Male Wanted for Unspeakable Sex Crimes

The New York City Police Department is asking for the public's assistance in apprehending a medium- to dark-skinned black male between the ages of 17 and 25, who is wanted in the New York City area for questioning in regard to unspeakable alleged sex...

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Funny story: Paranoid Cop Falsely Accuses Booger Slinger

Paranoid Cop Falsely Accuses Booger Slinger

As police across the fruited plain are being squirted with water pistols and “deloused” with buckets of water, many members of the so-called “thin blue line” have become paranoid. A Marion County, Indiana, officer, Dee Jay, who asked to remain ano...

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Funny story: "It Wasn't Me!", Said Girl

"It Wasn't Me!", Said Girl

A filthy young New York streetgirl accused of stealing and eating some chocolate from a shop, has claimed she wasn't responsible, despite the evidence still being all over her face. The grotty urchin, who looked about 5 years old, was interviewed...

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Funny story: Jussie Smollett In Second Racist And Homophobic Attack

Jussie Smollett In Second Racist And Homophobic Attack

Jussie Smollett, the former actor who used to star in 'Empire' before an alleged racist and homophobic attack left him scared to tell the truth, has suffered a second racist and homophobic attack, which was every bit as terrifying - if not more - tha...

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Funny story: Boris Johnson Has Fucking Big Row With Girlfriend

Boris Johnson Has Fucking Big Row With Girlfriend

The new Tory leader-elect, Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson, has had a steaming, great fucking row with his girlfriend, Carrie Symonds, at her London home, say neighbours. Johnson and Symonds were said to be arguing like 'cat and dog' during the...

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Funny story: Crack Cocaine Worth 75p Seized In Drugs Haul

Crack Cocaine Worth 75p Seized In Drugs Haul

Police have made a drugs bust in the northern port city of Hull, and believe they may have smashed a vital cog in the distribution of narcotics in East Yorkshire. A 24-year-old man riding a decrepit, old bicycle through the Orchard Park council es...

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Funny story: Police admit facial recognition system ‘does not recognise thieves’

Police admit facial recognition system ‘does not recognise thieves’

There is widespread embarrassment across the UK’s police forces after a £12 billion facial recognition system was found to be unable to detect known criminals. The system stores key facial characteristics such as the distance between the eyes and...

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Funny story: Young Man's Death Deemed Non-Tragic Suicide

Young Man's Death Deemed Non-Tragic Suicide

After 22-year-old Jake Pruitt of Queens, New York, was found dead in his bathtub, his wrists slit and bloody, police officers officially deemed his death a non-tragic suicide. "He really didn't have much going for him," said New York Police Chief...

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Funny story: Murder Mystery In Country House Has Police Baffled

Murder Mystery In Country House Has Police Baffled

A murder mystery at a sprawling country mansion has left police completely baffled, and desperately trying to find clues as to what happened and why. The murder took place at Tudor Mansion, deep in the Hampshire countryside, and detectives drafted...

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