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Boston Woman Demands Pedicure in Tow Zone

Boston, MA - A Boston woman who illegally parked in a clearly marked "tow zone" demanded a pedicure from a meter maid. The meter maid explained that "tow zone" does not mean a place where pedicures are given, but instead means a place where your...

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NHS Hospitals to Charge Entrance Fees

The unqualified success of hospital parking schemes which raise around £200m a year have prompted NHS trusts to look into other profit-making ideas. In 2016 several hospitals will try out an Entrance Fee system which could prove even more lucrative.

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Bruce "Caitlyn" Jenner Wasn't Popular Before; Philosophers ask, "Why Now?"

The recent controversy over Bruce Jenner cutting off his genitals and getting a boob job has been seen everywhere. But a philosopher has a question for those who worship him/her/it. "Why did you decide to like Bruce Jenner now, instead of before...

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UK Councils to prosecute over 8 million people for Nazi-style salutes

In a move designed to make even more money from the hapless motorist, councils throughout the UK are to begin to prosecute motorists (and/or their passengers as appropriate) for making Nazi-style salutes. Hot on the heels of the recent exposé of t...

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Tesco Allocates New Parking Bays For The Selfish

Tesco announced today that it is introducing new car parking areas specifically for those of a selfish disposition. The designated spaces will be added on to the ends of existing rows in Tesco's car parks and marked with cross hatching. The schem...

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So Easy Even a Man Can Do It - Parking Guide

Husbands - forget embarrassing parallel parking mess - ups, getting into trouble in the supermarket car park, scuffing your wife's expensive alloy wheels and banging the car door onto the next one while struggling to squeeze your beer gut out of the driver's door. Here's our confidence boosting parking advice: 1) Get touch up paint to keep in your "Man Bag". 2) Superglue giant cats whiskers...

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Kansas To Ban Holding Hands Before Marriage

Lloyd Bratcher and the local group of Church Police have had the Kansas Attorney General to enforce the law voted in by the state officials that a couple cannot hold hands, especially in public, before marriage. Miss Nancy Ingraham, 72 and a spin...

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Cheer Mother Circles Parking Lot Praying for a Spot

Omaha, Nebraska- Recently, Christie Randall, a mother of 9th grade cheerleader decided to circle the parking lot praying for an open spot. "I just thought that maybe, just maybe, there would be an opening today," Christie said with a stressed look.

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New York City To Build A 113 Story Parking Garage

NEW YORK CITY - The City Council of New York City has finally approved a bill that would allow for the construction of a 113 story parking garage. The city council had been discussing the idea for the past six months and they finally approved it w...

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Handicap Parking

Reluctantly, I gave in and we now have a Handicap Parking placard. "Getting old ain't for sissies," as my Mom use to say. With very poor vision and having to creep along on a cane now, I realized it was time for this additional chink in my armor. We went to he grocery store and Wal-Mart this past weekend and used the placard for the first time. We parked almost at the front door of Wall-Mart! "...

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Government Cutbacks to hit drivers...again!

The government are having a cut back on the size of car park spaces so that only smart cars will be able to fit in them. MP Ted Slime states: "With the country in the state it's in we need to save money wherever we can , so we can save on the pain...

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Tow truck towed by the same company

A Workington Vehicle Recovery Service has been forced to tow one of its own trucks, after it was discovered parks in a no-park zone in Workington town centre. "It's a bit embarrassing really," said tow-truck driver Barry O'Nick. "I was on my round...

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Sherlock Holmes's Fury At Dartmoor Parking Charges

A top local detective is furious at the introduction of parking charges on Dartmoor. The move follows cuts to the national park's funding. There has been an angry reaction to plans to replace "honesty boxes" with £4-a-day ticket machines. But m...

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Monkey parking

Councils in England and Wales are to start using Monkeys as parking wardens. Training the monkeys started eighteen months ago and some have passed there final tests with flying colours. "This is such a great move forward and frees up money for exp...

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Car-parks to crack down on inflatable cars

The UK's big three Car-Park operators are banding together to make inflatable cars illegal. "It's getting ridiculous," said N-CARP Chief of Operations, Carl Parkin. "At any one time in our town centre car-parks, about half of the spaces are occupi...

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Worrying Claims Over Parking Charges

A consumer watchdog survey has suggested that a driver's chances of receiving a parking ticket and how much they would pay is largely dependent on where in Britain they were at the time the offence was committed. After polling just under one hundr...

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Honest Driver's Letter to the Council

The following letter was received by the Nottingham City Council Parking Services, Loxley House, Station Street, Nottingham. NG2 3NG. We could not help but see the bitter-sweet side to the letter, however, the Council Officials obviously could not. Dear Sir, I went into your wonderful city last Tuesday, in my 1969 Austin Allegro registration W234 TIT, and after three hours managed to find...

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Motorist organisation recommends spray paint to evade snow happy traffic wardens

Motoring organization the CA (Car Association) is advising drivers across the UK to take cans of yellow spray paint on their journeys tonight after receiving reports of weather happy parking wardens exploiting snow obscured parking spaces on the say...

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