America, that fickle tribe, has blamed Canada for sending down the smoke of a million forest fires and turning the skyline of New York City into an orange apocalypse. Joe Biden sent firefighters up to the Great White North (really? want to change…
Donald Trump has now admitted that he uses a spray-on tan for that healthy orange glow. And now you can too! Want to look orange forever? When your actual skin is pasty and cadaver-esque and smells like the crypt, why not give it a good spray…
Contravening the age-old adage that apples and oranges are inherently too different to compare, a groundbreaking new study published by the Johnny Appleseed Association reported that when considered side by side, based on a number of relevant factor...
An agitated orange lashed out at his citric brethren for attempting to distinguish themselves from oranges. Cracky McOrange has stated that he does not see any real difference between tangerines and oranges, and thinks that the separate designation...
As Peggy Horton began pouring herself a glass of orange juice from the Crop-o-land container she knew right away something was off. "It was not orange, it was somewhat clear with whitish clumps of goo here and there" she said. "On behalf of...
SARASOTA COUNTY, Florida - Milo Bimbardi owner of The Hurricane Citrus Farm has just reported that he has lost a lot of his citrus crop to damn crocodiles. He spoke with the local news media and said that he has been growing oranges, lemons, and g...
LOS ANGELES - One of the stars of the hit comedy series Modern Family, Sofia Vergara, has just become engaged to her boyfriend of two years Nick Loeb. Loeb is a Florida businessman who reportedly has dealings in the orange pulp business as well as...
Still uncertain as to the extent of the frost damage expected from Florida's current orange crop, Brazil, the world's largest exporter of lemons, is preparing to fill the citrus void with a U.S. national advertising campaign featuring lemonade as an...
In shock news today, doctors at the Institute For Fruit Related Human Crossover Sciences revealed that Katie Price has been diagnosed with Orangitus. The rare disease is thought to be triggered by an overuse of certain tanning agents. The main ing...
Beijing has been shrouded in orange dust as a sandstorm blew hundreds of miles from drought-struck Northern China to the nations capital. Tea an men Square is to be renamed Tango an men Square after the super Orangy fizzy drink that turns everything...
ST. PAUL - In a repeat of the contentious battle for ballots between Norm Coleman and Al Franken for a Senate seat, Minnesotans have split once more. The initial tally of votes was so close that it triggered an automatic recount. Out of some 3 mi...
According to a ground breaking study that will be published in the Lancet this month a group of amateur scientists have stumbled upon what they claim to be the fruit gene. This news, if corroborated, will rock the world of fruit and vegetables to...
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