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Funny satire stories about Olsen twins

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Funny story: Ashley Olsen says she's done being a twin and vows to take out Mary-Kate

Ashley Olsen says she's done being a twin and vows to take out Mary-Kate

We've been reading about and watching Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen since they were mere babes. We've come to think of them as a set, even as they've grown up and established themselves as adult fashion designers. But now Ashleyhas other ideas. "I'm…

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Funny story: Olympic Swimmer Michael Phelps To Guest Star On The Vampire Diaries

Olympic Swimmer Michael Phelps To Guest Star On The Vampire Diaries

HOLLYWOOD - Manolo Middlezuck, producer of The Vampire Diaries, has just confirmed that he has just signed the world's greatest Olympian Michael Phelps to guest star on his hit show. Middlezuck stated that the shows leading stars Ian Somerhalder a...

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Funny story: Blackburn Rovers are Becoming Ridiculous, says a Man

Blackburn Rovers are Becoming Ridiculous, says a Man

A man said earlier today that Blackburn Rovers, the much-loved northern soccer club, are becoming ridiculous. When pressed on his astonishing accusation the man, 45, said that every time they appear in the newspapers or on Sky Sports News, Blackbu...

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Funny story: Mary-Kate Olsen: My Childhood Sucked. "Those big sacks of money were sooo heavy!"

Mary-Kate Olsen: My Childhood Sucked. "Those big sacks of money were sooo heavy!"

Mary-Kate Olsen, 1/2 of a twin-sister acting team so bereft of talent it took two of them to play one character, is bitching and moaning to Marie Claire about how much the childhood she had --which earned her about $400 million-- "Whaaah, poor me...

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Funny story: Olsen Twins Paid $1.33 Million Not to Pose for Playboy

Olsen Twins Paid $1.33 Million Not to Pose for Playboy

Hugh Hefner, owner of the Playboy empire, has often used his considerable checkbook to ensure only the hottest women make it into his celebrated titty magazine. This time, however, Hefner has gone a different route, paying skankadelic twins Mary-K...

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Funny story: The Vagina Monologues to be Renamed in Honor of National Breast Appreciation Day

The Vagina Monologues to be Renamed in Honor of National Breast Appreciation Day

The Vagina Monologues, the long running Broadway play, will be renamed for September 28th in honor of the celebration of National Breast Appreciation Day. Production assistant Lisa Naugahyde said that "we feel that, just like our performances enligh...

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Funny story: Hollywood Celebrates Hayden Panettierre On Her 18th Birthday and Entry Into Skankdom

Hollywood Celebrates Hayden Panettierre On Her 18th Birthday and Entry Into Skankdom

Hayden Panettierre, the young cheerleader from the cast of Heroes, turns eighteen years old this week. For her official entry into the world of Hollywood sleaze, other media personalities are throwing her a "skanking out" party. Each of several fam...

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Funny story: Ben "Ghandi" Kingsley Locks Lip With Olsen Twin Mary Kate

Ben "Ghandi" Kingsley Locks Lip With Olsen Twin Mary Kate

Ben Kingsley, Oscar winner for his title role in Ghandi and 63 years old, was seen kissing Mary-Kate Olsen on the set of his most recent film. The two are shooting a movie where he (Kingsley) plays the psychiatrist treating her (Olsen) boyfriend.

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Funny story: Another Lost Weekend

Another Lost Weekend

Paralytic Pictures announced today that they will be producing a remake of their classic picture, Lost Weekend.

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Funny story: Olsen Twins Mary-Kate and Ashley to Get Nose Jobs

Olsen Twins Mary-Kate and Ashley to Get Nose Jobs

The Olsen twins, Mary-Kate and Ashley, have decided to get matching nose jobs from a Hollywood plastic surgeon. Saying that they were tired of their old look and thought their noses were to big, the twins headed to surgery today.

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Funny story: Olsen Twins Nailed following a case of Mistaken Identity

Olsen Twins Nailed following a case of Mistaken Identity

Las Angeles - Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen were celebrating the opening of a new Taco Bell by wearing sombreros, when they were mistaken for two nails and hammered into the drywall of a nearby construction site.

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Funny story: The Sundance Film Festival; Previewing the Winners

The Sundance Film Festival; Previewing the Winners

Robert Redford's Sundance Film Festival kicked off this week in the central Utah town to the usual hoopla and stars. The crop of independent films competing for top prizes is as different from mainstream cinema as usual. There is also no surpri...

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