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Funny satire stories about Obesity

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Funny story: Donald Trump To Have Liposuction Surgery To Remove 97 Pounds of Fu*king Fat From His Gigantic Belly

Donald Trump To Have Liposuction Surgery To Remove 97 Pounds of Fu*king Fat From His Gigantic Belly

DETROIT – (Satire News) – The twice-impeached former occupant of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue was in Detroit, getting an estimate on having stomach liposuction. The Daily Dirt’s Stormy Coin said she spoke with his liposuctionist, who told her that old…

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Funny story: US visitors to the Belgian 'Battle of the Bulge' museum in Bastogne start battling their own 'Bulges!'

US visitors to the Belgian 'Battle of the Bulge' museum in Bastogne start battling their own 'Bulges!'

After a visit to the fascinating museum in Bastogne, Belgium, dedicated to one of the most horrendous battles of WW2, many visitors after leaving the place stare at their own 'Bulges' and feel quite guilty, especially US visitors! During their vis…

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Funny story: Joey Chestnut, America’s Favorite Glutton, Wins Again

Joey Chestnut, America’s Favorite Glutton, Wins Again

Joey Chestnut, who repeated his winning ways in this year’s edition of Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest, accomplished the nearly miraculous and unbelievably revolting act of eating 76 full sized hotdogs and buns in roughly 10 minutes. It was a…

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Funny story: Woman Finds Happiness Before Wood-chipper Demise

Woman Finds Happiness Before Wood-chipper Demise

Paducah, Ky: Bethany Gathers was on a mindful meditation walk when she started to run. Rudy, her husband heard screaming. “I knew it was Betty. I thought she was in some kind of trouble. Then she seen me and was hollerin’ "oh, I’m happy, I’m finally…

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Funny story: Mass anti-lockdown protests in London by women with 'barge-arses', and men with huge 'beer guts!!'

Mass anti-lockdown protests in London by women with 'barge-arses', and men with huge 'beer guts!!'

The lockdown is something that is, obviously, not a good thing for many people, but it is a necessary evil, if we are to eradicate COVID-19. However, on the path to vaccines, there are many mountains to climb, especially with women developing 'barge-…

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Funny story: Shock Findings Expose Obesity's Causes

Shock Findings Expose Obesity's Causes

Scientists in China have been studying the main causes of obesity. For the last seven years, the Wuhan Fat Observatory has been testing overweight people, and have just published their findings. The main factor appears to be caused by bacteria in…

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Funny story: Nevada Cheerleader Sacked

Nevada Cheerleader Sacked

There was controversy all the way down the sidelines at the University of Nevada this week, when its football team - the Nevada Wolf Pack - took the extraordinary step of banishing one of its cheerleaders from the squad for failing to come up to its…

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Funny story: Mom Tells Son That Eating Fruit And Vegetables Will Make Him Grow Up Big And Strong

Mom Tells Son That Eating Fruit And Vegetables Will Make Him Grow Up Big And Strong

Looking after your children properly and administering good advice is what being a parent is all about, and that's what one caring mom was thinking yesterday when she advised her four-year-old son that eating fruit and vegetables would make him big a…

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Funny story: Government redefines 'vegetable' to tackle obesity

Government redefines 'vegetable' to tackle obesity

The current drive to reduce obesity took a strange turn today. Mike Okesflat, Health Minister, told us that, rather than get people to eat less and exercise more, they would simply redefine the meaning of 'vegetable'. "We all know that you hav…

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Funny story: Government scheme to promote cycling for health stumbles at first hurdle

Government scheme to promote cycling for health stumbles at first hurdle

A government scheme offering £50 bike repair vouchers will launch in England on Tuesday, as part of plans to boost cycling and walking. It comes after the government launched its obesity strategy on Monday. Grant Shapps, currently on holiday in Sp…

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Funny story: Boris Johnson tackles the current Covid-19 obesity links

Boris Johnson tackles the current Covid-19 obesity links

Boris Johnson has pointed the country to some alarming statistics regarding the health of the UK. At a Press Conference held at the Lardy Gym in Paisley earlier today, Mr Johnson said, "More than 60% of adults in the UK are overweight or obese ac…

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Funny story: Boris Johnson forbids 2 for 1 junk food bargain buys in Brit supermarkets as he stocks up on Mars Bars!

Boris Johnson forbids 2 for 1 junk food bargain buys in Brit supermarkets as he stocks up on Mars Bars!

(UNEDITED) Edited: A van loaded with 'choccy' delicacies was secretly delivered to Nr 10 Downing Street on Sunday including, Snickers, Mars Bars, Kit Kat, and Ferrero Rocher, especially for BOJO's missus, plus deep frozen pizzas, burgers and kebabs.

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Funny story: Yes, Doctors Confirm, You Can Catch Coronavirus From Farts!

Yes, Doctors Confirm, You Can Catch Coronavirus From Farts!

Atlanta, GA - Resident Gastroenterologist at the CDC, Dr. Herb Greencloud, has been studying whether a person can catch COVID-19 from a fart. And the answer is a resounding 'YES!!' Explains Dr. Greencloud, "A fart, as it's commonly known in lay…

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Funny story: 50% off meals will reinvigorate hospitality sector - but lardy lockdown bingers fear meals will simply be half size

50% off meals will reinvigorate hospitality sector - but lardy lockdown bingers fear meals will simply be half size

The government's post-Coronavirus strategy will support ailing restaurants and tackle the lockdown binging obesity crisis by providing half a meal, at full price, for fatties. ‘This government isn’t going to sit on its arse, we’ve got an appetit…

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Funny story: Ant eating will save the world, not the ants!

Ant eating will save the world, not the ants!

Scientists have discovered that eating certain species of ants could save half of the world from starvation, and those who are obese, and love junk food, should be forced to eat ants to save astronomical health costs and airlines enlarging their seat…

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Funny story: Why Trump Must Give Up Golf

Why Trump Must Give Up Golf

Anonymous Democratic congresspeople said today that they wished Trump would stay off his golf courses. Said one, “The exercise he gets playing golf helps keep his morbidly obese body and brain functioning. I want him to be completely sedentary, eat...

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Funny story: The Trumps Talk About Killing Elephants, Pedophilia, and Crazy Nancy

The Trumps Talk About Killing Elephants, Pedophilia, and Crazy Nancy

President Trump and his two boys had a very rare meeting to discuss politics last Tuesday. The offspring had an alcoholic drink, and the President, a teetotaler, ordered some fried chicken. Trump earlier had a dinner of two Big Macs, fried chicken...

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