This week the MP for Wuthering-on-Heights Mr Ian gropesalot was found guilty in court of groping the house of commons tea lady. Mrs Bourbon 78 of Leicester was filling her trolley for the afternoon tea when Mr Gropesalot came from behind her and…
Bewigged fool Michael Made-up, the Tory councillor for a very small town that calls itself a city because it has a Cathedral is feeling that his position as a foolish public defender of Boris Johnson is under threat. Richard Bacon MP, not to be co…
Brian Asshat, grammar nazi, and thrower of shoes has said, to no-ones great surprise, that he will be giving the Conservatives one last go. Near neighbour, Gary Johnson said 'Over Lockdown I got to know Brian a bit, I mean I was always throwing hi…
Tory Minister Ivor Biggun is in deep trouble after suggesting that cash-strapped pensioners should think about saving money in the supermarkets by avoiding expensive foods such as caviar. The Eton-educated toff also told a caller giving his name as “…
MP Neil Parish has decided to step down after twice watching porn in Parliament while waiting to vote. Though it isn’t know which porn sites he was watching, a mole in government told this reporter, “We’ve heard he likes Puerto Rican girls with bi…
You know that weird bloke who looks like he got dressed really quickly, to avoid the attentions of a suspicious husband? Yes, him, the one who said those things about Hitler, and how in his day complaining was for sissies ‘When you could call them si…
Michael Madeup, an MP in a city that bangs on about the people that left it to become famous has shocked its residents by something stupid on Twitter, again. Local idiot Wayne Gaps said 'I like Michael he is just a laugh ain't he? I mean the hair,…
Bath dwelling scum Shane Richardson is angered that he and all of his scum friends have been compared to Conservative politicians. Outspoken Labour deputy Angela Rayner called the conservative government scum and has now offended every type of scu…
Although she has the job of Culture Secretary, Nadine Dorries, formerly a contestant on I'm A Celebrity Get me out of here, many people feel that there are other alternatives. Here we take a look at them. 1) The Krankies. - A famous Scottish comed…
Prime Minister Boris Johnson is leaving it to the country to decide on what they want to do on July 19th. Although, being warned by medical experts, and shops etc that leaving the decision to wear masks to the individuals is a dangerous thing, he…
In shocking news that surprised absolutely no one, another politician (we won't name names, but you can probably guess) has been caught doing something he shouldn't have been. Yes, that's right, he wasn't social distancing. Unlike, the old days th…
As news that Health Secretary Matt Hancock has been caught in yet another compromising position, we ask that maybe instead of power, incompetence is the real aphrodisiac. If you look at it logically, the government, ranging from Boris Johnson to J…
It is an obscure brand of pornography, invented in the 1970s, and uniquely British, and based around a centuries-old law that it is illegal to have sex with your local MP. The law was lifted in 1995, but the taboo continues. Videos of members of the...
Troubled London Stadium, Stratford, LONDON: With an expert in Stadium building announcing that the athletics stadium should be demolished and rebuilt properly as a football stadium, the Duchess of Knightsbridge has made an enormous gesture. "Let...
Following the roaring success of this year's Christmas John Lewis advert featuring a lonely old man living on the moon a government minister has come up with a unique solution to help all old, lonely, elderly, people. Norman Bygate, MP for Staff...
Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government Eric Pickles is to be replaced by a dugong in the General Election. The shock history-making revelation was made in an extraordinary constituency meeting in Brentwood and Ongar yesterday. "I...
Just as if things couldn't get any worse for the UK' s establishment after the dismissal of three judges for viewing pornography on business computers the other day, a recent audit of the House of Commons networks has uncovered similar misuse on 63 M...
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