(NOT EDITED) Divine intervention is happening all over the UK before Christmas as religious icons are spotted doing their good deeds after Boris Johnson and his Conservative cohorts failed miserably! It required 'help from above', so God decided t…
There was a painful end to a short conversation on the London Tube this morning, when a man who had tried to chat up a female fellow passenger received a kick in the gonads for his trouble. John O'Gape was travelling on the Northern Line having bo...
In a shock statement, the tenth circle of hell from Dante's "Inferno" has been named as the Northern Line at rush hour. Intended as the circle to punish commuters for trusting the British public transportation system, this horrendous site sees an...
An appeals court has reversed a municipal court's conviction of a Chelsea man who was ticketed by transport police for disturbing the peace after farting on the Tube. Brian DeBroder received several warnings before receiving the summons, this was aft...
Everyone has done it at one time or another: sometimes you're in public and you just have to trump; and sometimes it's on the London Underground in peak traffic when you have to chuff. Then what do you do? This reporter looked for people who regularly ride the Tube to find out what people do if they have to fart on public transport. So what happened? Some people considered even asking the qu...
59 year old Max Scholder died celebrating his birthday after his e-cig exploded in his pocket then ignited a gas explosion. Leila Scholder, wife of the deceased, talked to this reporter about what happened. "We were going home on the Undergrou...
In a move of breathtaking brilliance, the Community Secretary Eric Pickles today put down his pie and announced the initiative to save the Thames Valley from further flood damage. 'The Environment Agency will henceforth direct their hoses down the...
London Mayor Boris Johnson today released plans to completely close the tube network. It will be replaced by an exclusive underground cycle path. "Look I hate the Tube it's no secret." Johnson told the press "I really want to have it so that there...
In an altruistic campaign to promote diversity within multi-culturalism, The Spoof has launched a massive endeavor to educate ethnocentric Americans as to how well they have it as compared to other so-called developed (but, by American standards, woefully inadequate) countries. This particular article considers subways of the world. American Subways (the Best) American subways put those of o...
Living and working in London inevitably leads to suffering the subterranean cesspit that is the Underground system. This is a clarion call to all the selfish, unreasonable, obnoxious and fantastically annoying individuals out there using the Tube. To help in your quest for attaining universal disdain and irritation from all your fellow passengers, I've prepared a handy cut out and keep guide for y...
London Underground have chosen a Tourette's syndrome sufferer to voice all their station and train announcements throughout the two weeks of this year's Summer Olympics. In conjunction with the London Organising Committee of the Olympic Games (LOC...
Following the news that London's Tube workers have rejected the offer of a £500 bonus for turning up for work during the Olympics, another union is demanding extra pay. Explaining that his members' position wasn't at all bloody-minded or grasping,...
A special Police force is to be set up to patrol the London Underground but will having nothing to do with the Transport Police. The special unit will be called 'Smell and tell' and will be given special powers. "There's nothing worse than getting...
London UK: The final edition of the British Sunday tabloid "The News of the World" displayed the following headline LONDON UNDERGROUND LINGERIE BANDIT IDENTIFIED. Criminal activity has been reported to the Metropolitan Police involving ladies rid...
After the shock announcement from London Underground this weekend that its shedding 13 of its 51 Directors, Train Operators around the country are fighting to be first to say that they are following London's lead... like we do in everything else.
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, today started digging a big hole in his back garden. The excavation is reported to form the first phase of Shuttlecock's plan to: "go underground, like pop/new wave trio, The Jam did, back in 1980. But not on a train or...
The Mayor of London Boris Johnson has today announced that the Jubilee Line will be closed for good and filled with billions of tonnes of excrement. After months of suffering for commuters who have had to put up with such excuses as broken down tr...
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