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Man Invents Breakthrough Contraption That Assist Old People Who Are Always Forgetting Shit

Funny story: Man Invents Breakthrough Contraption That Assist Old People Who Are Always Forgetting Shit

Omaha, Nebraska - A lifelong resident here, has created a breakthrough invention for aging adults with memory troubles. Philip Myers, 63, claims The Invention will change people's lives. "It happens to all of us old folks," states Myers. "We're si...

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Elon Musk's latest invention: a paedo sniffer

The world of criminal investigation was cockahoop today after billionaire fish-faced eccentric Elon Musk revealed his latest invention. At a press conference, Musk wore one of his new prosthetic noses and was able to identify three members of the pre...

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New Vacuum Cleaner Doubles as a Watch Dog

Funny story: New Vacuum Cleaner Doubles as a Watch Dog

The Silicon Valley tech company of Lonco has just produced its latest product called Dogvac which is set to be released into the market on August 12 of this year. Dogvac is by far Lonco's most ingenious invention ever as it combines the high powered...

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Theologists Confirm Satan Invented Leaf-Blowers

Funny story: Theologists Confirm Satan Invented Leaf-Blowers

Jerusalem, Israel - A team of Oxford Theologists have confirmed what many believers have suspected for the last twenty years--that the most annoying of all gardening equipment was first thought up by the devil himself. "We stumbled across a very d...

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New Keypad Let's You Butt Dial On Purpose

Funny story: New Keypad Let's You Butt Dial On Purpose

Chemist, and now inventor, Trevor Maxon is enabling people to accurately do on purpose what they always do by accident: butt dial. For our interview and demonstration this day, Maxon is wearing his Bluetooth enabled Boogie Pad Butt Dialer jeans.

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Mankind's most important inventions

Funny story: Mankind's most important inventions

After a year-long intensive survey conducted by the TAVISTOCK MIND CONTROL UNIT a list of Mankind's most important inventions has been published. The learned work of 666 pages with full explanatory notes was compiled by director of the project Hiram Abiff Blair, cousin of ex-British Prime Minister Tony Blair founder of the The Royal Battersea Asylum for the Totally Beguiled. We have here a...

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Boxless Boxed Sets Inventor Dyson In Dispute With Sir Clive Sinclare

Funny story: Boxless Boxed Sets Inventor Dyson In Dispute With Sir Clive Sinclare

Dangerous car and cycle inventor, Sir Clive Sinclare walked off last night's BBC Panoramic current affairs programme after Top Ghia presenter Jeremy Paxo persistently asked him questions about his alleged womanising. Fellow guest, Sir Rupert "B...

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Invention Makes Transporter Beams Possible

Funny story: Invention Makes Transporter Beams Possible

An invention has made it possible to make a sheep disappear and appear again 2mm away from its original position. The invention only works with live sheep which sometimes have to be killed when it messes up. The invention will be on sale in time f...

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New Dyson Seatless Sofa Patent Targets Japanese Market

Funny story: New Dyson Seatless Sofa Patent Targets Japanese Market

Hatari Dyson, the inventor of the bagless tea bag has come up trumps with another potential winner. With factories tooled up to produce billions of the innovative seatless "standing only" sofas, colossal post Christmas sofa orders have broken all re...

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MacDison Swiss Army Bagpipes sold to U.S. Navy in $100m deal

Funny story: MacDison Swiss Army Bagpipes sold to U.S. Navy in $100m deal

MacDison PLC has clinched a $100m contract to supply Swiss Army Bagpipes to the U.S. Navy. The innovative bagpipes include an Egg Boiler, Tyre Inflator, Knife Blade, Letter Opener, Light, Magnifying Glass, Money Clip, Nail File, Pen, Pin, Protractor,...

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Whatever Happened to Paddy Freeman?

Funny story: Whatever Happened to Paddy Freeman?

Patrick Freeman has gone missing. The amateur inventor from a little village in the South of Ireland claimed on his Facebook page that he had invented a car that could run on tap water. It required, he said, only a rechargeable battery and its en...

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Dyson Invents Clockwork Can Opener

Funny story: Dyson Invents Clockwork Can Opener

Chinese businessmen packed out the latest Dyson product preview seminar yesterday queueing up to invest trillions in the Dyson patented clockwork can opener manufacturing franchises that were being sold at Earls Court. The ground breaking can open...

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George Foreman Says Ben Franklin Helped Him Become Wealthy

Funny story: George Foreman Says Ben Franklin Helped Him Become Wealthy

Benjamin Franklin has been credited as being the inventor of the bifocals, the lightning rod, the odometer, the $100 bill, and the Franklin Stove. But hardly anyone knows that the kite-flying chubster also invented the Franklin Grill, which hundreds...

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Nothing exciting found by physicists

Funny story: Nothing exciting found by physicists

Disappointments such as the Higgs Boson particle which doesn't do anything at all and dark matter which you can't see, are causing dwindling numbers of young people to choose Physics at school and major in it at college. "The days when lasers were...

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A Man In Toledo Ohio Invents An Army Penknife With 93 Tools

Funny story: A Man In Toledo Ohio Invents An Army Penknife With 93 Tools

TOLEDO, Ohio - Ever since he was a youngster Titus Hank Hookerhaus has always loved to dabble in the world of inventions. Well 19 years of dabbling have finally paid off as he has just invented the biggest army penknife in existence. The knife...

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A Minnesota Man Invents A Helicopter That Runs On A Mixture Of Tap Water And Dandelion Weeds

Funny story: A Minnesota Man Invents A Helicopter That Runs On A Mixture Of Tap Water And Dandelion Weeds

DULUTH, Minnesota - Ezra P. Crackerbee, 73, has always liked to tinker around his garage in Duluth. One day last week as he was putting away some gardening tools he noticed that one of the hoes had some shreds of dandelion weed on the blade. A...

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The list voted most important invention of all time

Funny story: The list voted most important invention of all time

In a recent survey of science historians, the history of science book has been torn up and thrown away with the revelation that the humble list is the most important invention of all time. "We thought that they might choose Newton's laws of motion...

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Tartan Paint is finally invented

It's been a well-known practical joke for years now, someone is asked to fetch a list of products which don't exist and they fall for it because in the spur of the moment the items sound quite believable. Examples of products people might be asked fo...

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Breaking news…

Trump Says Democrats Should Thank Him for Being Such A Terrible President

...Because they never would've won the House by such a wide margin without him!
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