(Worthington, Minnesota) Vegans around the country joyously celebrated today as JBS, the world’s largest producer of certified dolphin-free beef and heart-healthy pork and pork by-products, shuttered its largest production facility in the U.S. this w...
The 1970s were a glorious time when hippies roamed the Earth, streaking was encouraged, and you could literally throw empty beer cans out the window while driving. But there are many questions about this era that have long baffled sociologists. Many...
FORT COLLINS, COLORADO - Pottery businesses in Colorado are experiencing booming sales. Weed users, especially those who don't have acreage, are buying up pots by the dozens to grow their own canniabus. Over the past month, pots of every color...
"Is the war over?" Were the first words Star Zephyrwind uttered while taking his first breath of fresh un-pot-ladened air after more than four decades of hiding in a cave on the upstate New York dairy farm used for the giant rock concert "Woodstock".
CANNABISTOWN, PO--In Potlandia, marijuana is legal for recreational purposes and is commonly smoked by nearly all of the adult citizens of that country, while alcohol and nicotine are banned. But the alcohol and tobacco industries regard Potlandia's...
Yes, you have tried to understand them but they're weird and wacko. You've tried to relate to them but they're almost like aliens from an ugly, bizarre, brown dwarf star . . . . In your young wisdom, you are just now discovering how the Flower Power - Free Love & Free Sex turned 'Me! Me! Me!' generation didn't generate much for you. You're feeling unplugged, no doubt. You're running...
I am writing this out of concern for the quality of hippies we have here in America at the moment. The other day I overheard a small group of alternative types in a natural food store discussing how they were going to fly around the U.S. this summer. Since when, I do ask, do hippies FLY other than when they have scored some particularly good dope? REAL hippies hitchhike or ride bikes or drive...
In an important breakthrough, scientists have discovered a gene that causes a fondness for paisley. This gene, which was discovered on chromosome 11, nestled between addictive personality and porphyria, is known as PKGUM2. Although the presence o...
A group calling themselves the People's Republic of Stokes Croft are continuing to protest against the opening of a Tesco's shop in Bristol. The group are named after the totalitarian regime which seized power in China in the 1950s, and the Bristol g...
San Francisco, CA - Mark Bongmeister, age 65, has become yet another casualty of the 1960's hippie era - victim of a painful lava lamp accident. In fact, several thousand incidents involving the "lava" filled pop-art light contraptions have been...
Actor Taylor Lautner will be starring in a new adult movie based on the old comic classics, "The Fabulous Fuzzy Freak Brothers" which is proving to be a very profitable trend of late. "It combines youth stars like Lautner and Chaske Spencer with o...
Caroline Spelman, Minister for the Environment, Food and Rural Affairs has announced a radical new proposal to reintroduce hippies into certain parts of the United Kingdom. Following the success of similar measures involving beavers, ospreys and r...
Once upon a time, there was a large hippie clan living in a remote area of the Appalachian Mountains. They had been living a quiet life out of mainstream America since the early 70's. They dropped out of society during the Nixon administration fully expecting to re-integrate back in when Nixon left office, but decided their lifestyle was one that could not be abandoned so easily. Numbering in t...
Not everyone on the Gulf Coast of Florida is bemoaning the dastardly effects of tar balls washing up on their pristine white-sand beaches. Harold "Happy" Toner and his wife Sunny Toner are turning those tar balls into dollar bills. "Oh, we're hipp...
In the blink of an eye, the New Age will be over, and the New Old Age will take over. Sources close to the divine greatness himself known only as a whisper have confirmed that before the end of the second decade of 2000, the world, as we know it, wi...
Bagpipes blaring, a large procession of Generation XYers walked slowly up Market towards Haight St. in San Francisco yesterday. The solemn procession was led by a modern day Lady Godiva, naked, with flowers in her hair, riding a white steed.
San Francisco, California - "You know that song about a boy and his dragon that I would sing to you all the time?" reminisced Mary Travers in a low soft-spoken voice to her family and friends and a reporter from "Rolling Stone" magazine that gathered...
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