BROOKLYN – (Sports Satire) – In what is being billed as the world’s first boxing match in which one of the boxers was in a wheelchair, the Willie Sambuca vs. Bobby Pistachio fight was a huge success. Flyweight boxer Willie “Wheels” Sambuca, who ha…
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – New York City Police are reporting that Rudolph William Louis Giuliani is actually a zombie. NYPD said that they got over 200 calls reporting a zombie sighting, and, after investigating, they ascertained that it was…
CHICAGO – Historical experts are really concerned that the way that statues are being torn down and taken down, it won’t be too long before the nation’s statues are all gone. They noted that out of 27 statues of Confederate General Robert E. Lee,…
BROOKLYN, New York – Joey Chestnut won his 13th straight Nathan's Famous July Fourth Hot Dog Eating Contest, as he put away a grand total of 75 hot dogs in only 10 minutes. Joey says that he warms up by eating a quart of strawberry Jello which he…
BROOKLYN – Miki Sudo is a member of the Major League Eating Federation, and she has captured national eating titles in many categories. Over the July 4th holiday, Miki easily won the womens division of the Nathan’s Famous July Fourth Hot Dog Eatin…
Brooklyn – The head of one of New York City’s most notorious crime families, says that he and his ‘employees’ will not shelter-in-place, and there is no one who can make them. A reporter with The New York World Register newspaper recently talked t...
BROOKLYN – Infamous crime boss, Salvatore Goombalini, has issued a statement that he hopes the residents of New York City will pay attention to. Sal, as his family, his close friends, and law-enforcement officers call him, said that he is putting...
NEW YORK CITY – The New York World Register is reporting that most liquor stores in the five New York boroughs are doing booming business. Cortez Bellisario, who owns The Spirits of Brooklyn Liquor Store, said that his high sales volume indicates...
Several months after handsome, charismatic 38-year-old Hopper Bartlett moved to town, even those residents of Nashville, Tennessee, who'd been keen to find a chink in his super cool facade were forced to conclude that Hopper was, in fact, a really co...
it's sitting pretty, right under the Brooklyn Bridge, but nobody knows how it got there. Speculation is rampant though. Here are a few of the rumors: -- Billy Joel, The Piano Man, put it there to create publicity for his next concert. -- The ghost of Liberace is responsible. He's still looking for a candelabra to complete the picture. -- The piano may be the first piece of a huge or...
Brooklyn- New York, 43 year old Bakery assistant Douglas Barnes has been arrested for loitering in the hall way of his Girlfriend's apartment building. Barnes who was waiting for his girlfriend to come home from work so he could propose was dress...
BROOKLYN - Charzanbul Canbar, who works as a Brooklyn cab driver, first came to the United States from Afghanistan in May of 2007. In that time he managed to work 7 days a week, 12 hours a day, and he finally saved enough to buy his own taxi cab.
ROME - Pasquale Pettigolezzo, a reporter with The Daily Vino has just stated that Italy has passed a law that it says it should have passed years ago. Pettigolezzo said that the Italian Senate voted unanimously to ban the use of the word Mafia.
BROOKLYN - Salvatore Goombalini, the head of the notorious Goombalini family, has issued a message to Kirstie Alley and the other members of the Church of The Scientific Method. The Brooklyn Mob boss stated in no uncertain terms that Alley better...
LOS ANGELES - Liam Hemsworth who ended his engagement to Miley Cyrus several months ago said he could not believe his eyes as he watched the 2013 MTV Music Video Awards Show which were held in the Barclay Center in Brooklyn. Hemsworth said that wh...
BROOKLYN - The notorious Mafioso Salvatore Goombalini, who heads one of New York City's biggest mob families, has informed President Obama that his offer of a week ago still stands. Goombalini, who is the eldest of 10 brothers, let the president k...
NEW YORK CITY - The rumor that Jennifer Lopez could be breaking up with her boy toy Casper Smart has just gained some credence. An unidentified source said that J.Lo paid a visit to a tattoo parlor in Brooklyn to have an intimate tattoo located on...
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