Superstar leader singer, BONO, (May His Name Be Forever Praised), has said that if Donald Trump tries to become the American president again, U2 and other musicians are ready to save America. Bono will call up all his friends in the music biz to h…
What do Bono, Bob Geldoff (haven’t heard from him since … well, since he didn’t like Mondays and tried to cure AIDS. Or was is it to save Ethiopia? How are they doing? Been a while since we heard anything. They still dying? Good work, Bob), and Billy…
BRUSSELS - In the aftermath of the European Commission's decision to reprimand Apple over their tax avoidance they have now turned their attention to rock star, humanitarian and professional pranet Bono. Controversially, in 2006, U2 opted to move the...
Hello It's Bono. Dis year I have had to deal with those naughty boys from ISIS. Da buggers ran around killing people in Paris in an attempt to stop me singing. But I was able to get back on stage and show dem. Nothing stops Bono. I plan to go to the middle east and take care of dem personally in the new year. This has got personal. You do not try to stop Bono. While I was in Paris I wa...
Many music critics view Wagner's music as problematic because of the composers' anti-Semitic views, and many argue that his classic works of opera are inseparable from his hatred of Jewish people. However, not everyone agrees. So, we've asked a couple of real music experts (not some pathetic, pedantic, mainstream, dusty old music critics), to give their two (million) cents worth on this on...
Sir Bob Geldof has taken his 30th anniversary supergroup Band AID to the Amazon for what was meant be a secret Christmas special finale to Band AID 30. The supergroup haven't been able to perform the hit 'Do they know It's Christmas?' as they had int...
Hello Hello, Dis year I have been busy saving the world again. My friend and fellow tax exile Sir Bob let me sing on Band Aid again. So that I could start in my new mission to eradicate Ebola. I think I will have this all cured by Christmas, but I will be promoting my other things as well. I now have a rival, Russell Brand, who thinks he can be the saviour of the world. He can't there is on...
Los Angeles - It has been announced that Prince and Bono will team up to record a follow-up to the 1980's anthem "We Are the World" to raise public awareness about the latest immigration crisis along our southern border. Many other artists wer...
Florida, An attempt to land Justin Bieber on the moon by shooting him from a catapult ended in disaster when the annoying pop sensation overshot his target and is now condemned to an infinity of drifting aimlessly in space at a uniform velocity witho...
Ordinary normally working everyday working-man Dave Marx has become the sensation of 2014 after sawing his legs off and then penning his very own ode to agony. It is thought Dave saw an episode of Jeremy Kyle and felt sorry for all those poor people who were forced to live lives with varying handicaps. He decided the only thing for it was to saw both of his legs off and then make a song about it t...
American hip-hop artist Kanye West has given his fans a Christmas gift they will never forget, deciding to legally change his date of birth to 25 December 4BC. West's groundbreaking age reclassification decision means he will not only share a birt...
Dear All, Once again this year I have singlehandedly saved the world on many occasions. I was able to stop people being in poverty and get myself a nice new hat. I have also found the cure to AIDS, HIV and Cancer so I will be saving all of those people next year. I would like to thank my friends in the Irish and British governments who looked the other way when I put all my money through a D...
Following the announcement that Pope Benedict the XVI will step down on the 28th of February Bono the lead singer of the band U2 has said that he would like to be the next Bishop of Rome. Popes are elected by a conclave of cardinals under the age...
Tiny Irish rock knob-head Bono, 3' 4", has sensationally reformed Girls Aloud he said today, from his castle in Switzerland. The U2 frontman has taken full responsibility for the girl bands reformation, telling reporters that he should now be offi...
NEW YORK, NY--Sources from a parallel universe where all the members of Irish rock band U2 died in a plane crash during their 1987 Joshua Tree Tour reported today that Rolling Stone's annual "Greatest Bands of All-Time" listed the late band as the th...
A Utah man, dying of thirst after waiting over 6 minutes to get served a beer has received help from an unexpected source. Greg Marshall, 28, was attempting to purchase a beer last Saturday night at his favorite bar "Sweet Larry's" unfortunately...
Irish rockstar Bono checked into a Monte Carlo hospital for a routine medical procedure to have his ego topped up in the frontal lobe of the brain. This is an operation Bono has every year but something went horribly wrong this time and consequences...
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