PARIS – (Satire News) - French President Emmanuel “Macaroni” Macron has just sent the pride and joy of the French navy towards Turkey. The FS Brigitte Bardot should arrive in a few days. Macron said that the purpose for the voyage is to collect th…
MOSCOW – The Kremlin is reporting that The RSS Mrs. Nikita Khrushchev, Russia’s biggest most powerful aircraft carrier will be under a 14 day quarantine due to the Coronavirus. It seems that one of the Russian sailors has a girlfriend who is from...
Portsmouth - Special Agents Gibbs and DiNozzo reportedly snuck aboard taking the carrier's crew quota to 5,602 when news of the hush-hush deployment broke. Their mission on the US Navy's fabled Big Stick remains classified Top Secret as the magnif...
There have been numerous reports of aircraft disasters in recent weeks. Some of the aircraft went down in freak accidents while others were taken down by antiaircraft missiles shot by terrorists on the ground. Yesterday, in an unintended heroic act o...
The queen is to name the U.K.s biggest warship Bazil because it sounds like her favourite herb. The Queen is due to give the name to the largest warship built in the UK at a ceremony in Fife's Rosyth dockyard. She will smash a bottle of whisky on...
Washington D.C. (LGBT Picayune) - The United States' aircraft carrier John C. Stennis, CVN-74, has filed suit in Federal District Court in Washington D.C. over the U.S. Navy's refusal to grant the carrier transgender status. For centuries around...
MOSCOW - Russia's Vodkavich News Agency is reporting that President Putin has decided to send one of Russia's mightiest aircraft carriers to Cuba. The Russian leader told Vodkavich that the RS Mikhail Baryshnikov will be setting sail within the ne...
WASHINGTON DC-Representatives of Princess Cruises, Royal Caribbean International, Carnival Cruises, Disney Cruises and other cruise services are reportedly bidding for the U. S. Navy's first nuclear-powered aircraft carrier, the USS Enterprise, for u...
Yep, she needed it. That floating piece of--um--history started out as an abandoned, shrunken, weathered behemoth measuring an impressive three hundred and four feet from bowsprit to spanker. (Don't ask). There was a budget crunch in 1797, but...
REYKJAVIK, Iceland - Iceland has just announced that it will be naming its brand new state-of-the-art aircraft carrier in honor of South African President Nelson Mandela. A spokesperson for the Icelandic government stated that originally the aircr...
YOKOHAMA, Japan - The government of Japan has just launched what it is calling the biggest aircraft carrier in the nation's history. Saki, the Japanese national news agency stated that the 820-foot aircraft carrier, which is the first in 70 years...
Somewhere At Sea - Looking to shake its stodgy image and sinking popularity, the Republican Party has purchased Carnival Cruise Lines. The move is designed to rebrand and re-energize the right side of the political spectrum. "From here on out, the...
The Ministry of Defence today announced that IKEA had won the contract, to provide the Navy's next generation of economy wooden aircraft carriers. The idea of using the chipboard warships has angered many traditionalists within the armed forces, but...
Following last year's swingeing cuts to the Royal Navy fleet, the UK government has announced arrangements which will allow Britain and France to share the only aircraft carrier owned by a western European nation. At present, the French carrier is...
A new super weapon called the Carrier-Killer by China who developed it, does not pose a major threat to the United States according to Vice Admiral, Scott Van Buskirk, head of the U.S. 7th Fleet in the pacific. "The Russians gave up on the same we...
Today, the government announced that construction of the Royal Navy's two new aircraft carriers is to go ahead. However, for the first two years of their service, they will have no aircraft, due to dire cuts in the defence budget and the axing of the...
Prime Minister David Cameron is poised to approve a £5 billion order for two new aircraft carriers for the Royal Navy - thanks to a boyhood hobby. The decision follows a meeting of the national security council he chaired yesterday. And it comes a...
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