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Funny satire stories about Age

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Malaysian Prime Minister Has A Cold

Funny story: Malaysian Prime Minister Has A Cold

There was panic in the Malaysian capital of Kuala Lumpur last night when it was revealed that the country's newly-elected leader, the 92-year-old Dr. Mahathir Mohamad, had a cold. Dr. Mohamad is the oldest Prime Minister in the world, after his p...

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Florida Bar Owner Forced Into Lawsuit For Denying Access to a Trans-Aged Person

Funny story: Florida Bar Owner Forced Into Lawsuit For Denying Access to a Trans-Aged Person

Larry Horowitz, a bar owner in the vacation town of Destin, FL,was forced into a lawsuit over the denial of a Trans-Aged child into a bar at a resort earlier last week. The Lawsuit Lasted just three short days and ended in a settlement of $12,000 for...

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One Day Datebots Say No To Oldies

A spokesman for the Union of One Day Datebots has announced that the escort automatons will no longer accept the custom of older homo sapiens. In a surprise move, the robots have declared that they would deny their service to both mammals over the...

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NASA Has Just Hired A 67-Year-Old Grandmother To Be An Astronaut

Funny story: NASA Has Just Hired A 67-Year-Old Grandmother To Be An Astronaut

HOUSTON - President Obama recently stated to a group of retired lumberjacks up in Portland, Oregon that times have really changed. And now with NASA's announcement, that saying is really, really ringing true. NASA spokesman Trent Timmelfarb inf...

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Scientists Discover That Saturn Is Not Really 4.5 Million Years Old As Everyone Had Believed

Funny story: Scientists Discover That Saturn Is Not Really 4.5 Million Years Old As Everyone Had Believed

HOUSTON - One of the world's leading scientist Dr. Currington S. Clexweiser has just made an unbelievable discovery. Dr. Clexweiser has revealed that recent scientific studies show that the planet Saturn, which is listed as being 4.5 million years...

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62-Year-Old Bachelor Decides to Date Only Age-Appropriate Women in Their 30s

Funny story: 62-Year-Old Bachelor Decides to Date Only Age-Appropriate Women in Their 30s

After several failed relationships with women in their early to mid-twenties, 62-year-old* bachelor Nick Candlewood decided to date only age-appropriate women in their thirties. "There are some very smart, mature 25-year-olds out there," remarks N...

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Scientific Study Finds That People Lose Their Marbles At Forty!

Funny story: Scientific Study Finds That People Lose Their Marbles At Forty!

A recent scientific study to determine the age when the human brain starts to show a significant decline in it's reasoning powers has found that it's no later than forty. This is much earlier than was determined by a different team of scientists in 2...

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Mental powers decline after 45

Alcohol researchers have finally discovered that heavy drinking affects the brain. After 44 unsuccessful results, researchers at Carlsburg University recently came up with a winning study. They got 10,000 'initially reluctant' volunteers to consum...

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The Blue Rinse Crowd - Getting Old

Funny story: The Blue Rinse Crowd - Getting Old

Don't worry about getting old. It happens to us all. JUST DON'T JOIN THE BLUE RINSE CROWD. Our knees may creak and our backs may ache but just stay young at heart...hang around with younger people and if your hair turns white,enjoy it. JUST DON'T JOIN THE BLUE RINSE CROWD. I was lucky in that my hair started to turn white in my 20's and was totally white by my late 20's. It's in the genes...

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World's Oldest Man Dies

Funny story: World's Oldest Man Dies

Sad news today as the World's oldest man, Walter Breuning, died in America at the age of 114. He was well known for such sayings as 'We're all born to Die' and 'I'm ninety nine You Know' , and just recently said 'I'm One Hundred & Fourteen.'...

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A Lesson In Becoming Old

Funny story: A Lesson In Becoming Old

It's not everyday you wake up and you are told you're old. Well OK, maybe it is, but only if you listen, and I'm told that one of the only benefits of growing old is selective hearing. Well, that and standing on street corners and yelling at youngsters about how 'they don't know they're born' and 'pull your trousers up' (in a purely fashion-oriented sense, not in a peadophilic way!) I jus...

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Symptoms of being over 30

Funny story: Symptoms of being over 30

In the event that you are showing signs of adopting any of the traits or habits below, and you are under 30 years of age, then you are maturing too fast! In the event that you are over 30, and not finding any of the traits below are applicable to you - then you are childish and underdeveloped mentally. 1. You leave clubs before the end to "beat the rush". 2. You get more excited about h...

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Betty White Resolves To Die In 2011

Funny story: Betty White Resolves To Die In 2011

While most people resolve to change their lives in a meaningful way in the upcoming year, Emmy-winner Betty White hopes that 2011 ends with her in a lavish brass casket. Unexplained Reference Key Helen Kushnick (1946 - 1996)Jay Leno's former agent...

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Elton John has gay pride and joy at last

Funny story: Elton John has gay pride and joy at last

Elton John and his partner David Furnish have at last agreed to have a baby, after years of agonising. "The problem was," says Elton," we considered there were far too many backward children in the world without producing another." However in...

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People are getting older, science blokes reckon

Funny story: People are getting older, science blokes reckon

In an astonishing announcement type thing yesterday, some science chap said that he has been doing some studying and that, of people and stuff. Our reporter bloke went to go and see him and he took a pen and paper too. Just for the look of the th...

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Average age will soon be 100

Funny story: Average age will soon be 100

Great scientific advances will be heralding in a time when 100 is the average age. The Queen is worried she will have to send so many messages of congratulation that she will run out of paper and Prince Charles, becoming frustrated at waiting so long...

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50 Year-Old Man Refused Wine In Tesco's - Because He Had No Idea

Funny story: 50 Year-Old Man Refused Wine In Tesco's - Because He Had No Idea

A man of fifty was stopped from buying a bottle of wine in Tesco's because he admitted to staff that he had no idea what he was buying. He said that he usually drank lager, but had decided on a whim to try wine. Staff at the Birmingham store firs...

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Another Black Centenarian Dies on President Obama's Watch

Funny story: Another Black Centenarian Dies on President Obama's Watch

ATLANTA, Georgia - The world's oldest woman, Ann Nixon Cooper, the Atlanta woman whose name Barack Obama invoked to symbolize America's struggles and progress, died in her sleep Monday. This is the second black centenarian to die on the President'...

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Breaking news…

Trump to Continue Dictator Tour

There are still a few dictators in the world that Trump hasn't groveled to.
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