The Cosmos - (Armageddinouttahere!): Wiccas' harshest equivalent of a Federal Emergency Management Agency executive order was issued today. The astrology warning by the Global Sabbath Council says Monday's Yuletide solstice will will be a monster.
London - (IVF Observer): Followers of pre-Islamic tantric sex goddess and Miss Fertile Crescent 500BC Al-Lat have renamed key dates in the Wiccan lunar calendar ahead of this Friday's apocalyptic Virgo new moon. The almanac forms the basis of vir...
London - (Ass Mess): London's Non-Aligned Coven of Hotass Witches has issued a red alert for an unprecedented disaster this Wednesday 15 October, the 21st anniversary of the Great Storm. The day coincides with the communication planet Mercury endi...
New York - (Patriarchal Mess): "The Nazi Pope has soiled America and now he must pay!" This, the grim message of World Council of Wiccans, damning satanic P2 Lodge Pope Ratzinger's contamination of sacred American soil this week.
New documents have surfaced in the world of religion. Specifically, the Wicca religion. The chronicles in question, shed some light on the formation of the "world's oldest religion".
Washington DC - (Cardiac Mess): GOP wannabe presidential nominee John McCain is heading for an imminent fatal coronary according to astrological analysis from the World Wiccan Council AGM at the Du Pont Circle HQ this weekend.
Watch out Starbucks! Coffee & A Spell, a coffee shop in Kenmore, a village in New York State's Erie County, is bewitching customers by not only serving up gourmet coffee but by also providing tarot readings and assorted reading material...
Phones, fax lines, and websites at Wiccan headquarters around the globe have been buzzing with frantic demands for information.
Cerne Abbas, Wiltshire - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): Whoever daubed a Homer Simpson fertility god effigy next to the UK's most sacred Wiccan symbol, the Cerne Abbas Giant, may have evoked a terrible ancient curse according to local Wiltshire Pagans wh...
The Cosmos - (Ass Mess): This year's pre-Summer Solstice astrology has all the signs and omens of a massive upheaval for world governments according to the combined resources of the World Wiccan Council meeting this weekend in London's Strawb...
Washington DC - (Rioters): The World Council of Matriarchy issued a statement today broadly backing the Rev Al Sharpton's bigotry jibe that says ex-Governor Mitt Romney has yet to come off the fence viz his personal beliefs about the segregation...
Madison, Wisconsin - (Rioters): The Pentagon's dragon of ignorance and bigotry was finally slain on St George's Day as the US Department of Veteran Affairs caved in on a headstones pentacle ban that had outlawed the ancient Wiccan symbol fro...
Vatican City- Today the Pope was shocked to recieve a letter from the Wiccans who usually keep to themselves. He was even more shocked when he opened it. Inside was a single page with but one paragraph on it.
Bahamas - (ReUterus): The Nassau Earth Mysteries Coven has issued its sternest warning yet that Saturday's Lunar eclipse cuts across strategic astrological lines in Anna Nicole Smith's natal chart...
Macworld, San Francisco - (Ass Mess): A revolutionary new Wiccan hex-messaging i-Phone launched at the annual Geekfest in San Francisco this week is a runaway winner according to reports which show it is outstripping conventional cellphone technology...
New York, NY - (Ass Mess): Fed up with the pandemic of patriarchal TheoCon claptrap that has infiltrated the video-game market, a group of Manhattan Wiccans has launched their very own game where players defeat the forces of Fundamentalism by hexing...
Washington DC - (Associated Mess): US Ambassador to the United Nations John Bolton is the latest victim of an awesomely successful Samhain hex issued by US Wiccans who earlier dispatched Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld to the DC dustbin AND demolis...
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