A traveling family of illegal immigrants awaiting transportation from France to England on a heavy goods vehicle are said to be 'delighted' at the government's announcement that it has temporarily relaxed the legal restrictions on the length of time...
English fans eat your heart out. A slice of justice today as the Russian Prime Minister, Vladimir Putin, was served a slice of revenge as he left Moscow to Zurich to celebrate the country's victory. The irony? He had to fly Easyjet. Due t...
Sub-zero freezing temperatures ground Britain's railways to a halt as the Siberian winter increased it's grip on an already frigid country. Despite the north of England having suffered and struggled on for over a week, once the Arctic weather hit the...
A freeze has been put on sensational Wikileaks revelations as the Government introduced a -20 degree temperature. Burst pipes may result but David Cameron announced that 'the damage to Britain would have been far worse if we hadn't taken this action...
LONDON & GOD KNOWS WHERE - As Britain is launched into the coldest winter ever, one man emphasises. His name is Tom Tucker, lost in the Arctic Cirlce since two weeks ago. How we managed to interview him is a mystery. "Well, howdy," said Tuc...
The effects of global warming are having a devastating effect on the UK. Sandy, boiling hot windy deserts, drying up of lakes and rivers, rising sea-levels, livestock dying because of lack of water and food. Cactus and palm trees are replacing...
Danny Thomas, 32, today sensationally told people what they already knew. Upon walking in to a local shop and filling his basket, and then approaching the till, Thomas, rubbing his hands together in a friction related warming action, told those as...
Passions are high at the meteorological office, more heat is being engendered than the cold snap in February. 'It is so exciting' said Met Chief Isobar Therm 'and it is going to get better. We will be headline news all next week.' However homel...
LONDON - As Britain is set to receive a snowy November in most parts, skeptics are denying global warming. A new forcast by the International Weather Agency has suggested that torrents of bullshit will flood workplaces. "Oh god..." said one di...
LONDON - David Cameron, a public sector worker, was evicted by his home by Mother Nature. He had lived in the building since June with his wife and kids. "It's terrible!" he proclaims. "How on earth could this happen? You know, they say you're...
Rare weather patterns and unseasonably warm temperatures will be responsible for a convergence of two storm systems today, where sustained winds are expected to reach more that 60 miles per hour. Local authorities are preparing for the worst, give...
Flags hang more limply, kites are struggling to get aloft and the washing takes a little longer to dry. According to an astonishing new study, Britain has got noticeably less windy over the last few decades. The reason behind this is due to a dra...
...up the wall by MPs who are pissed off with not being able to pass their piss up payments on to the tax payer. Emergency cold weather payments to the elderly could be cut from £25 to £8.50 under plans to replace members of parliaments partying p...
The National Weather Service issued a cryptic, unintelligible and essentially useless tornado warning for parts of Monmouth and Ocean counties, New Jersey this evening as a heavy band of severe thunderstorms moved across the state bringing damaging w...
Hurricane Earl, the Atlantic storm system has caused chaos across the Atlantic in the UK. The West Coast of the UK has been battered by wind speeds of up to sixty miles an hour dislodging roof tiles and blowing over cones on the M6. It was the lat...
With a bank holiday weekend looming, the Met Office is forecasting rain, a bit more rain, followed by thundery showers, prolonged spells of wet weather, and then more rain. It will probably feel a bit colder than the seasonal average too. And p...
Dallas T-Vue Live-Eye Storm Team Meteorologist, Sally Cowley last Monday reported that a cold front was heading to Texas and was expected to reach the state later in the week. Ms. Cowley was able to give this forecast without the slightest giggle eve...
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