The codes used by the president to launch a nuclear strike were mislaid for months during the Clinton administration, a former high-ranking US officer has said. Ex-chairman of the Chief of Staff Joints General Hugh Janus made the claim in a new bo...
The popular Irish Nun's Steeplechase which has taken place in Ireland for the past 200 years has finally been accepted as an Olympic Sport. The Chairman of the Olympics Committee Lady Sebaceous Gland-Coe made the announcement from her London office...
In a shock move CBS has announced that Tiger Woods is to replace Charlie Sheen on the hit comedy show "Two and a Half Men" CBS revealed that it had approached Woods management following the infamous "Short Drive" incident outside Woods home last N...
Jonny Wilkinson England's World Cup Hero winning Fly-half has shocked the Rugby world by admitting that he is a heterosexual. In a statement issued by his manager Ben Dover-Backwards,Wilkinson said "Yes it's true Ive always been straight even whil...
Popular crooner Sir Elton John has announced a new Gay Condolence Service aimed at people with Gay friends or relatives that have passed away. For a mere $500 you can have a headline "Elton Devastated At John Smith's death" published in the Tablo...
There has been a huge outpouring of sympathy from fans and stars alike for Jennifer Anniston upon her discovery of a "rogue colourless strand of grey hair" Jen had a message of condolence from famous trollop Madonna whose hair has come out of a bo...
Photographs of Madonna passionately kissing model Satan Sux have been released. In the pictures, the 50-year-old singer is seen lying on top of the 22-year-old Brazilian devil and looking on as he towels himself down. The images appear in a 46-...
A spokesman for Michael Jackson has angrily denied that the Superstar has had an anus transplant. Rumours surfaced that the Prince of Pop is suffering from a mystery disease which caused him to seek an anus transplant. The sources say that Jack...
A bogie belonging to Scarlett Johansson has sold for over $5000 on Ebay. The freshly picked bogie weighing in at 5ounces was eagerly sought after by thousands of international bogie collectors worldwide. The lucky collector Mr I Pickem from Lit...
Fading pop/porn star Mad Donna has refuted claims that she is a vein, arrogant, pompous, untalented, unscrupulous, unhappy bitch. Following her quickie divorce of Guy Ritchie she has lashed out at the media who are trying to portray her as being a...
The Soviet dictator, who was responsible for the deaths of around 15 million people during his 31-year reign of terror, is in second place in online voting for the Name of Russia competition. Stalin last week surrendered a narrow lead to Nicholas...
It has been revealed that former US Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld is actually the legendary Rock & Roll singer Buddy Holly. Holly who was thought by millions to have been killed in a plane crash in 1959 miraculously survived but was too tr...
An English stockbroker has survived a 300ft fall from a London Hotel. The man Mr Sandy Volestrangler fell off a 16th floor balcony at London's swish Dorchester Hotel in Park Lane. He plunged headfirst into a jam jar that was left on the forecou...
New Zealand Assistant Coach Wayne Smith has admitted that they will be fielding the popular 'Black Ferns', the female version of the All Blacks team at Twickenham on Saturday. "The English team is said to be playing like girls at the moment so it'...
Christopher Tolkien son of Lord Of The Rings author J.R.R.Tolkien has hit out at some media claims that the Gandalf character is Gay. Speculation about the wizards sexuality increased following JK Rowling's announcement that Professor Dumbledore...
Superstar Brad Pitt is looking to change his name as he is fed up with it being used as rhyming slang for s**t. It is not known yet what name he will choose. Legendary singer Eartha Kitt, 81, has also decided to change her name for the same rea...
Eerily echoing JFK's secret trysts with Marilyn Monroe, insiders say that President Elect Barack Obama has been seeing Paris Hilton. Hilton who has just announced her split with Benji Madden is remaining tight lipped about the alleged affair but s...
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