Geographical Correctness

Submitted by j.w.

Thursday, 19 August 2010

Trouble from the Geographical Correctness League. They couldn't accept Isle of Person for Isle of Man. However Isle of Person/daughter was allowed. Consideration was given to Isle of Perdaughter/son, but it was felt to be lacking poetry by Byron Wordsworth.

Byron Wordsworth, last seen wandering lonely as a cloud having left partners of both sexes, protested that too many of the new names were unpoetic.

The suggestion that Ireland should become Eire has been overruled. The letters IRE are still there, suggesting the country is angry. Ulsterland has been favoured by some and Iraland by others. A war was about to break out over the issue until the two sides avoided all out war by returning to Ireland. It was accurate to describe the country as full of ire after all.

Wales has been a problem. After the Cardiff Tourist Board offered holidays to 'English Virgins' to spend a vacation in 'Sperm Wales' it was thought something had to change. Disgusted from Tunbridge Wales was so outraged he/she wrote to a newspaper about it. Happily there was a chorus of approval from the valleys at the suggestion Jonesland should be the country's new name.

Christmas Island is an offensive name for some religious people. 'It must Go' said the head of the Correctness League. A problem on finding another name has been averted on realising the Island will go soon anyway with rising sea waters.

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