Question: How many ears does Picard have?
Answer: Three. A right ear. A left ear. And a final front ear.
Question: What did the first officer answer when Picard asked "Why did you let Troi win at poker?"
Answer: "Because I Riker."
Question: What is Thomas Riker's dating philosophy?
Answer: "If at first you don't succeed, try Troi again."
Question: What did Worf say when small ice asteroids began hitting the Enterprise hull?
Answer: "Captain, we are being hailed."
Question: Did you hear about the singing contest for young men at Starfleet Academy?
Answer: It's called the Kirk Tenor Prize.
Question: How many of the Enterprise's senior officers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Answer: All of them. One to screw it in, and the rest to debate the moral implications.
Question: What did Lore use to kill Data's cat?
Question: What do you call it when that Strategic Operations Officer on DS9 runs as fast as he can?
Answer: Worf Speed.
Question: Did you hear that Jonathan Frakes is starring in a remake of an old James Bond movie?
Answer: It's called Moonriker.
Question: How many TOS landing party members does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Answer: Only one, but the extra red-shirt will die in the attempt.