I found out the secret to those people who come on the television and announce they have lost 150 pounds on certain, certain product and you can too!
They also get to be on Dr. Phil and that Oz wizard.
If you're really serious about losing a lot of weight. Get this: First you need to eat up to 300 pounds before you start your diet.
1. You can probably qualify for ObamaCare for funding.
2. At first you can eat everything you want!
3. You send in your before and after pics.
4. You sleep most of the time for a couple of months while the pounds are melting away. ObamaCare will also pay for sleeping pills I bet.
You know what. I could probably get a commercial payment from Obama to show how well ObamaCare works.
Just twenty more pounds. I'm pretty sick of ice cream and cake anyway.
-Mary Moleturd