More Rejection

Submitted by Andrew Coisman

Tuesday, 24 July 2012

"Dear Mr Coisman. 

While we appreciate your attempt to expand our customer base to include the, to quote your e-mail, "untapped, if you catch my drift" female nudist market, we find your idea of "Bare-Vag Darts" not only to be in poor taste, but in violation of all but 3 of our 'health and safety' policies (although if some of your phrasing were to be taken literally, we could extend this to include our policy on pets, cutting that figure to 2).

Perhaps we are not able to appreciate your idea to it's full, as the profanity filter on our e-mail server blocked the visual presentation that accompanied your original proposal, but I think I can say beyond any doubt, that we are more than pleased with our current clientele and have no wish to branch out at this stage.

Your other idea, "Funbag Friday", has piqued our interest as we have many boiled sweets and trinkets left over from our annual 'St Patricks Day Model Train Exhibition and Knit-Off' that we could easily use to fill these "Funbags". Our part-time marketing manager, Beryll, is eagerly awaiting the conceptual photographs you have kindly offered to send via post.

Yours Sincerely.
Patricia Crayon.
Merthyr Darts Club.

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