Driving through the Aussie outback after a long flight, a pommie's looking foward to a nice warm bed in the hotel room that he had booked.
All of a sudden, he notices a huge commotion at the side of the road.
Back in the UK it's customary to help someone if they're in trouble so he slows his rental car to take a look.
"Oh I'm so sorry!" he says, flustered and embarrassed when he see's that the shaking of the bush was caused by a local Aussie farmer giving a sheep one.
Further down the road the pom' finds a pub and decides he needs a drink, goes inside, sits by the bar and orders a beer.
Glancing around he notices a one-legged bloke jerking off and shakes his head in disgust.
"G'day mate," says the bartender, "What's troublin' ya?"
"I've only been in Australia for a few hours and already I've seen a farmer shagging one of his sheep. Now I come into a bar to sort myself out, and what do I find? That crippled bloke wanking himself off!" says the very embarrassed man, tipping back his drink.
"Fair dinkum mate," says the bartender, "But yer can't expect a bloke with only one leg to go an' catch a sheep now can ya?"