Hot Pursuit

Submitted by C. Lance the Freelance

Thursday, 24 March 2011

A man is being pursued by the police. He accelerates when he realizes it's him they're after, but the police car keeps up with him with no difficulty. Through residential areas, school zones, up the interstate, and down old country roads, the man leads the cruiser on a scenic tour of the county. They finally reach a point where the man cannot go any farther.

Knowing the jig is up, the man pulls over and waits for the police car to pull up behind him. Expecting the worst, the man turns off the ignition, takes out his wallet to produce identification, and puts his hands out the partially open window to signify he doesn't intend to go anywhere.

Eventually, the police officer, sporting the typical mirrored sunglasses and utility belt that would make Batman green with envy, gets out of his cruiser and cautiously walks up to the driver's side window, ticketbook in hand. The man rolls down his window the rest of the way and nervously greets the cop. Beads of sweat trickle down his worried face. "Can I help you, officer?"

"Sir, I need to see some identification and proof of insurance please." the cop instructs the man in a courteous manner. The man produces both required documents. The officer looks at them and gives them back to the man. "Sir, I'm in a generous mood today. If you can give me one very, very good reason why you evaded me at a high rate of speed through school zones, residential areas, and everywhere else you've taken me for the last half-hour, I will let you go with only a warning."

Relieved that he might get out of this with just a slap on the wrist, the man rubs his chin, thinks hard for a couple seconds, and smiles as if the lightbulb has just gone on above his head. "Well, you see, sir, my wife recently left me to go live with her boyfriend who is a police officer, and I was terribly afraid that you were him trying to track me down and bring her back to me."

The officer allows the excuse to resonate in his mind for a few moments, and then a smile crosses his stern face. "Have a nice day, sir." The cop turns around and returns to his cruiser, laughing to himself the whole way.

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