Q: Where can you find a good lawyer?
A: In the cemetery.
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?
A: A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?
A: A vampire only sucks blood at night.
Q: What's the difference between God and a lawyer?
A: God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
Q: What is the difference between a lawyer and a sperm cell?
A: At least the sperm has a 1 in 600 million chance at becoming a human being.
Q: What's the difference between a porcupine and two lawyers in a Porsche?
A: The porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?
A: You take off your shoes to jump on a trampoline!
Q: What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?
A: The tick drops off after you're dead.
Q: What's black and brown and would look good on a lawyer?
A: A doberman pinscher.
Q: What do you call an honest lawyer?
A: An impossibility.
Collected from all around the webs joke sites
