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From News Discussion / Dorking Base Jumper Killed In Tragic Accident
Posted 18 Apr 12 23:06
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Great story, nice research although arguably it is the highest point in se England. J

 
From General Discussion / Transvestite had sex with a dog at English Heritage castle
Posted 23 Jul 10 17:00
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btw - this is a true story as is the other one today about sign theft in Shittington.

I think about one person a week gets arrested for some kind of public perversion. They have a big problem in turkey with goats..

 
From General Discussion / How long woud it take to drink 100pints without death? (because I can't spill dying)
Posted 22 Jul 10 22:43
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Quote: queen mudder

After 20 pints you end up drowning.

And Sainsbury's 'Basics' 4.2% cider is only 86p per 2L bottle this week, special offer.


That's good news although I'd like to remind readers that it is possible to get very drunk on 4% cider despite what my granny says.

She believes it is not possible to get drunk on beer or cider. Either she is wrong or the 1940s were more 'wired' than I thought.

 
From General Discussion / How long woud it take to drink 100pints without death? (because I can't spill dying)
Posted 22 Jul 10 21:27
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Due to the agreable weather and disagreable economic climate, I've taken to drinking 4.2% cider which works out as an attractive 35p a pint - providing you buy two litres at tesco or asda for £1.32

Allowing for 'head' and spillage this is close enough to 4 pints. I think I can put back 6-10 pints of this in hot weather but how long would it take to do 100? Or is it even possible?



 
From General Discussion / My favourite thing about writing for The Spoof
Posted 21 Jul 10 19:52
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It get's a lot of my chest.

 
From General Discussion / Least liked PRODUCT you lived with in your childhood
Posted 21 Jul 10 15:55
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Stone axe

 
From News Discussion / Robotic Michael Jackson not ready for 'Ascension' tour
Posted 16 Jul 10 14:10
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Shamelessly hawking my wares..

 
From General Discussion / Beastiality the pros and cons
Posted 15 Jul 10 22:01
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What's for dinner?

 
From News Discussion / Isle of Wight goes missing
Posted 15 Jul 10 21:57
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A lot of people would jump at the chance to cruise the Ballierics without leaving their own home..

 
From General Discussion / Unconditional Love
Posted 15 Jul 10 19:51
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There was a boy
A very strange enchanted boy
They say he wandered very far, very far
Over land and sea
A little shy
And sad of eye
But very wise
Was he

And then one day
A magic day he passed my way
And while we spoke of many things, fools and kings
This he said to me
"The greatest thing
You'll ever learn
Is just to love
And be loved
In return"

(instrumental interlude)

"The greatest thing
You'll ever learn
Is just to love
And be loved
In return"


 
From News Discussion / BBC to honour Raoul Moat by building a moat around Broadcasting House
Posted 14 Jul 10 21:06
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I like it. The BBC is one of the most useless organisations in the world. If David Attenborough defected to ITV it would be 'all over'.

 
From News Discussion / 'Crowning' EDF extracted from government 'money' orifice
Posted 14 Jul 10 18:17
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Thanks Queen M - just found this section

 
From News Discussion / Paul Gascoigne helping search for Raoul Moat
Posted 14 Jul 10 18:12
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Thanks Erskine - I've just noticed your message. I also did a snippet - Spain 1 Netherlands 0 but it wouldn't have won a normal 'scores' bet because it was in extra time.

 
From General Discussion / Unconditional Love
Posted 14 Jul 10 18:02
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Certain types of grammar and concrete job offers. Never lawyers or any type of home visit salesperson

 
From General Discussion / A discussion about heat
Posted 14 Jul 10 10:01
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Hi Skoob,

Does thrashing something around in a bucket actually make the water hotter if it was insulated as much as possible but not under any pressure?

I've had a scout for info on Google but the jury is still out.

It would mean water rushing down a rocky gully would also be heated.

 
From General Discussion / Are girls called Rachel usually good looking?
Posted 14 Jul 10 09:38
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That's very true Lynton - there's a lot of pretty 'trailer trash' girls in the UK but they're always surrounded by dumb knuckleheads looking for fights.

 
From General Discussion / Are girls called Rachel usually good looking?
Posted 13 Jul 10 10:57
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Rachel Flintoff? Not bad.

 
From General Discussion / Are girls called Rachel usually good looking?
Posted 13 Jul 10 10:40
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I've got a theory based on actually and TV evidence that Rachels are on the whole, fit and if there are exceptions there are less than other names.

Any thoughts?

 
From General Discussion / My Favourite Owl
Posted 12 Jul 10 21:31
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What about the white toothed Simonck Owl?

 
From General Discussion / Why don't....
Posted 10 Jul 10 15:02
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Why don't I survive if I step out of a free falling lift just at the right time?

 
From News Discussion / Surgical instruments 'left inside' patients
Posted 31 May 10 13:06
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Very good - my kind of story.

 
From News Discussion / Pound goes missing
Posted 29 May 10 12:03
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Don't worry - I have the solution.

 
From News Discussion / Fat Asre Grows Exponentially
Posted 29 May 10 11:44
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Like it. No MD would say 'unhealthy food' though. I would edit it to say deep fried mars bars or flip flops.

 
From News Discussion / Pound goes missing
Posted 29 May 10 11:36
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I deleted an image from one of my stories but I can't pick another. I want the editor to help choose an image and caption. How do I do it? Any ideas?

 
From News Discussion / Pound goes missing
Posted 29 May 10 10:28
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Yes, it's a take on a story from 'the day today' back in 1995. Good fun though!

 
2 Pages - [1] 2 »
Any opinions expressed here are purely the opinions of the contributors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Spoof, its staff or the original writer of the spoof news/parody/satire story.

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