Forum Home / Login / Register

This forum does not allow guest posting. You must register to participate in this forum.

Messages ordered by earliest posts first
All times are GMT

Forum Home / News Discussion / German Jew Scolded for Refusing to Wear Piece of Cloth


[This topic is LOCKED]

AuthorMessage
Forumbot
Automated
Posted: 21 Jul 20 20:47

Extract from Story:
BERLIN, GERMANY—Amid a national emergency and crumbling economy, two members of a Jewish family find themselves on opposite sides of the political discussion. One of the men, a businessman by the name of Josef Judenstein, refuses to abide by the law that requires him to wear a yellow Star of David on his clothing. This has caused conflict between Judenstein and one of his cousins, Judah Iscarwitz,…...

Click here for full story »


Please discuss at will.
PLEASE NOTE: The story you are discussing is a JOKE. It is a SPOOF NEWS story written on a SPOOF NEWS website.


sean hodgson
Writer


Location: Faringdon England
Registered: 1 Jul 20

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 21 Jul 20 20:50
At the top of this discussion form is the line:

'The story you are discussing is a JOKE. It is a SPOOF NEWS story written on a SPOOF NEWS'

What part of this article is a 'Joke' or is 'Spoof News'. It reads more like a serious article.

Monkey Woods
Dirty Ape
Monkey Woods

Location: Planet Earth
Registered: 29 Dec 06

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 22 Jul 20 05:11 - Edited By: Monkey Woods, 22 Jul 20 05:13
Well, I'm not the author, of course, but I sensed a certain amount of irony in the story when I read it.

As I've said before, 'funny' is good, but it doesn't have to be the sort of thing that has everybody rolling in the aisles.

Is it not funny that Iscarwitz couldn't see Judenstein's fears, and railed against them, knowing, as we do, the terrible ending?

Plus, it was well written, and needed no changes making.

On both accounts, a novelty.

sean hodgson
Writer


Location: Faringdon England
Registered: 1 Jul 20

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 22 Jul 20 09:45
Yes perhaps your right. After I sent this I later thought better of it.

Sir Geoffroy Cockface
Writer


Registered: 29 Aug 15

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 22 Jul 20 11:04
You were right. The story is rubbish.

It's obviously about face masks, but it's a bit fucked up to compare wearing a face mask with wearing a star of David in Nazi Germany.

Apart from the laziness of the comparison, it couldn't be more wrong, and it doesn't even have a hint of irony or humour.

Attacking government is a staple of satire, but attacking public health advice is just...weird.

What next, comparing washing your hands with genocide?

I mean, in a way it's good that we have a wide range of nutters on this site, but these conspiracy theorists are really crazy.


Monkey Woods
Dirty Ape
Monkey Woods

Location: Planet Earth
Registered: 29 Dec 06

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 22 Jul 20 13:21

Quote: Sir Geoffroy Cockface

it doesn't even have a hint of irony or humour.




A risky subject, I know, but I took the fact that Iscarwitz was being so blasé about the reasons for wearing the star, as being somewhat ironic, knowing what we now know about the next steps in that process.

Not funny, I agree, but so much of the stuff on here, at the moment, Geoff, is not only 'not funny', but appears to have been written by 12-year-olds.

Dr. Billingsgate
Academic zero, literary hero


Location: Galapagos Islands
Registered: 22 Feb 10

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 22 Jul 20 13:28
Would this be published in THE ONION? I think not. Maybe that is why they pay their writers, while The Spoof does not.

Monkey Woods
Dirty Ape
Monkey Woods

Location: Planet Earth
Registered: 29 Dec 06

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 22 Jul 20 13:42

Quote: Dr. Billingsgate

Would this be published in THE ONION? I think not. Maybe that is why they pay their writers, while The Spoof does not.


What's interesting, is that this writer has written other stories of a 'more serious' nature, and not at all funny, in my opinion.

It's possible, I suppose, that the writer thinks this is an appropriate place for those more serious stories, when, in reality, it turns out that, at the moment, you're not going to get on if you don't submit stories with endless references to President Trump, how many Big Macs he eats, how orange he is, how small his pecker is, and how much Melania wants to get back to Trump Tower.

Oh, don't let me forget sexy bikini swimsuits, secret tattoos, and Daisy Duke short shorts.

sean hodgson
Writer


Location: Faringdon England
Registered: 1 Jul 20

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 22 Jul 20 14:07
If I ever submit a piece about Trump wearing his Daisy Duke shorts over his Bikini then throw me off the site... no hang on perhaps...

Monkey Woods
Dirty Ape
Monkey Woods

Location: Planet Earth
Registered: 29 Dec 06

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 23 Jul 20 01:30 - Edited By: Monkey Woods, 23 Jul 20 01:36
You'll have to hurry, Sean. Somebody's probably already writing it.


Quote: Sir Geoffroy Cockface

it doesn't even have a hint of irony or humour.




If you really want to get your teeth into something that's not funny, Geoff, try this one:

Boko Haram release their version of Procul Harem's 'Whiter Shade of Pale' in support of BLM!

I wanted to put it in the forum for discussion, but am unable to do so, for a reason I haven't been able to discover.

It contains the rearranged lyrics of a song:

We whipped white boys' bums fandango
Turned cartwheels at the door
We were feeling kinda seasick
But our Boko boys called out for more
So we went back even 'harder'
And beheaded them on the way
When we called out for another drink
A head appeared on a tray


Is this an example of a comic genius, or somebody in the category Geoff mentions below?


Quote: Sir Geoffroy Cockface

it's good that we have a wide range of nutters on this site,




Sir Geoffroy Cockface
Writer


Registered: 29 Aug 15

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 23 Jul 20 07:10

Quote: Monkey Woods

If you really want to get your teeth into something that's not funny, Geoff, try this one:

Boko Haram release their version of Procul Harem's 'Whiter Shade of Pale' in support of BLM!

I wanted to put it in the forum for discussion, but am unable to do so, for a reason I haven't been able to discover.



I'd say that's funny. I mean, I didn't laugh, but it's daft enough.


Monkey Woods
Dirty Ape
Monkey Woods

Location: Planet Earth
Registered: 29 Dec 06

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 23 Jul 20 08:10 - Edited By: Monkey Woods, 23 Jul 20 08:10

Quote: Sir Geoffroy Cockface

I'd say that's funny.




Funny in what way?

Do you mean the kind of 'funny' we use to express our surprise about something?

"That's funny - I'm sure I picked my keys up from the table."

Or the 'funny' we use to suggest we don't relieve believe something we've been told?

"He said he's with his mates? That sounds a bit funny."

Or the kind of 'funny' we use to imply somebody is a little bit odd?

"Yeah, I know! He's a bit 'funny' in the head!"

Or do you mean the kind of 'funny' we use when we find something humorous?

"Dave Henry's stories - they're really funny!"

If it's the last one, I need some help in understanding.

Jaggedone
Writer
Jaggedone

Location: Back under the bridge!
Registered: 8 Apr 09

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 23 Jul 20 08:56 - Edited By: Jaggedone, 23 Jul 20 21:33
Now where is the bastard?

Mark
Spoofer-in-Chief
Mark

Location: Lancaster, England
Registered: 8 Apr 03

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 23 Jul 20 10:39

Barbarism, mistreatment and despicable acts from such terrorist groups are still among us, and here on the spoof, my intention was, in a 'humorous' manner to make readers aware of the very point!!


But it doesn't do this. IMHO, it falls short of the mark. It feels rushed and underdeveloped. It doesn't go far enough to deride the barbarism, and, in so doing, promotes it.

Also, there is no need to invoke BLM in the article, it just jars.

You've smushed two ideas into one: one attempting to mock terrorism, the other presenting a delusory hysteria purporting to people taking offence from the use of the words black and white outside of a racial context.

Must try harder

Jaggedone
Writer
Jaggedone

Location: Back under the bridge!
Registered: 8 Apr 09

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 23 Jul 20 13:50
Mark, on which planet do you actually live on??? Your answer is just so full of crap it's beyond comprehension...But I guess that's the standards you love; Trump, Harry Maguire, etc, etc.

Yes indeed, I am a massive thorn in MW's and your crown of thorns, hence you have the audacity to default my work; well mate, I could tell you to fuck off, maybe I should, but I am not going to be defeated by the likes of you and your cohort...

So, Sir Galahad of the spoof scene, ban me, get rid of the thorn that dares to piss up MW's and your rather pathetic tree...However, I love a good old fashioned literary punch up!

BTW, your sad subjective opinion of my last spoof stinks, but I'm used to that treatment here...

Jaggedone
Writer
Jaggedone

Location: Back under the bridge!
Registered: 8 Apr 09

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 23 Jul 20 13:52 - Edited By: Jaggedone, 23 Jul 20 21:37
A load of bollocks! But what's new?



Monkey Woods
Dirty Ape
Monkey Woods

Location: Planet Earth
Registered: 29 Dec 06

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 23 Jul 20 15:13
Did someone say "literary punch-up"?


Quote: Jaggedone

I know why MW thought this was not funny,




There's no secret. I thought it wasn't funny because it wasn't funny.


Quote: JaggedoneI had a dig at his non-stop interference!




Yes, it's interesting that you think you have to keep dropping references to Mark and myself into your stories. There's so much to write about. Why don't you stop writing about us? Still, whatever it was, it wasn't


Quote: Jaggedone

revenge




Your story struck me as an example of one that wasn't funny, and I was involved in a mini-discussion with Sean and Geoff about another story that Geoff said contained no humour. I wanted to show him a story that, I thought, really didn't contain any humour.


Quote: Jaggedone

No, my spoof was not 'funny' in the context of sit com humor. However, the backbone of the spoof was to assure people that the threat of global terrorism, just because we have covid, is not gone. Barbarism, mistreatment and despicable acts from such terrorist groups are still among us, and here on the spoof, my intention was, in a 'humorous' manner to make readers aware of the very point!!




Ah, I knew it! I was sure there was something I was missing; some deeper point; some message; some awareness-making, and that it wasn't just changing the words of a Procul Harum (Harem, I think you said) song, to include the imagery of a beheading.

I should have known. Sorry..


Quote: Jaggedone

Non-stop Trumpism's make me puke, he is a mega asshole, the whole world knows that, this subject has run its course a thousand times, especially by our US friends. The Covid pandemic is a sensitive subject, not much to say about that apart from taking the piss out of Trump and BOJO in their utter ineptitude to deal with the crisis, OK done and dusted that subject.




Anybody want a waffle?


Quote: Jaggedone

So, instead, I go out on a tangent, write a, IMHO, humorous warning about the disgusting acts of such terrorist groups and get slaughtered by the one and only Harry Maguire specialist




We talked about this already. Don't you remember? I said that another writer complained to me about how many Harry Maguire stories I'd done. His name is Abel Rodriguez. I think you two are friends. There was a touch of irony about the whole episode, because he writes a lot of stories about President Trump, and, I thought, many more than I wrote about Harry. I looked at his last 100 stories, and counted how many of them were about Trump, and I looked at my last 100, and counted Harry stories.

Thirteen (13) of my stories were about Harry; forty-six (46) of his were about Trump. There were others about Melania, Eric, and White House insiders and so on, but I thought I'd be lenient, and just count the ones tbat specifically had President Trump in the headline.

I honestly hope that I don't have to bang on about this again, but, if I do, I suppose there's always 'copy and paste'.



Quote: Jaggedone

who manages to hit the popular spoof buttons with every spoof he writes entertaining his 'thousands of readers' (How the fuck he does it is beyond me)




If you're referring to the number of points I have, I would hazard a guess that it is the number of stories that I have written, rather than their literary quality, or lack thereof.

The same thing applies to anyone who constantly scores highly. Just ask your friend..


Quote: Jaggedone

MW, you are a well known perpetrator of bad feelings here, many superb writers left because of your seemingly 'important' position, that's a fact! In fact, many have told me how much they 'hate' you!




There should be a full stop after the word 'here', then an upper case 'M'.

They left because of my 'important' position? And it's a fact?

Name them.

Before you do, define 'many'.

Then define 'fact'

They 'hate' me? Listen, Les - is it OK to call you Les? - they don't know me. They only think they do, because of my comments in the forum. You mean to say, they hate the responses they get when I try to adhere to the site's rules? Or because I have to reject a story for some reason? Or, perhaps, because their stories, when submitted, appear as if a 5-year-old, whose first language isn't English, has typed them out in a darkened room, and I've asked them to have another look before I edit it.

Maybe they needed thicker skin.

Name them anyway. I'm curious.


Quote: Les

Mark really should get someone in who can do the job in a more objective manner,




Like yourself? Ask him. What's the worst he could say?

No, wait. Don't.


Quote: Jaggedone

and you sir, should only be allowed to continue your Maquire specials.




Maquire? Who's he? Maguire?

JO, I welcomed you back. What's in the past, is in the past, as far as I'm concerned. But it seems that you want to carry on in the same way that ended up with you taking a break.

First, you started a thread asking how to download your "legal property", and were already on the offensive. You started the tbread with:


Quote: Jaggedone

I never wish to return here, but...




We knew, then, you were on your way.

Eventually, you got your contact with Mark, but, instead of trying to be calm, you filled up another thread with remembrances of 'how great it used to be' with "a plethora of great Brit writers" whose names you couldn't recall. You even found time to drag ME into it, calling me Mark's "cohort", without me even having appeared in the thread.

I think we sensed then, that things weren't right.

Then you came back, and, before your feet are under the table, you're attacking K.C. Bell for her stories which were too much like real news, and the links to her other material at the foot of her articles.

As well as lambasting US writers for their endless Trump stories, little realising that your friend, Abel, is, by far, the most prolific writer of Trump stories. Maybe you should let him know how you feel...

But, getting back to K.C. Bell, the reason her articles use real events, is that she adds her own comments to them. They aren't news stories, they're magazine articles of political commentary, and that's why most - not all - of them go in the Magazine.

And the links? Well, that was easily explained, wasn't it? No need for all those nasty words and phrases that you used:


Quote: Jaggedone

"This writer gets away with murder..."

"I need an explanation how she get's [sic] away with it"

"Quite incredible, unless she is paying Mark thousands for the pleasure, which I very much doubt."

"I just surfed over to one of your lovely US writer's spoofs and, low [sic] and behold, all of her fucking Amazon book links are plastered all over the bottom of her spoof, just like she does all the time!"




You also told Dr. Billingsgate:

"I despise people abusing their rights here..."

Oh, dear, JO! What a catalogue, a pile, a shedload, an avalanche of errors! And all because hou couldn't wait to find out the truth! I asked you to be patient, but you seem to enjoy being a 'victim', and went steamrollering on with your insults, of which K.C. Bell seems to have remained oblivious.

Fortunately.

Jaggedone
Writer
Jaggedone

Location: Back under the bridge!
Registered: 8 Apr 09

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 23 Jul 20 16:31 - Edited By: Jaggedone, 23 Jul 20 21:36
Bla. bla, bla





Jaggedone
Writer
Jaggedone

Location: Back under the bridge!
Registered: 8 Apr 09

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 23 Jul 20 16:43 - Edited By: Jaggedone, 23 Jul 20 21:36
My sincere apologies to KC Bell, but don't blame me, blame our glorious leader for not coming out immediately, calming the storm, and telling everybody why KC was allowed to punch his/her Amazon links out there.

This would never have happened if Mark had reacted adequately.

Once again; my apologies and success with your work. JO

Mark
Spoofer-in-Chief
Mark

Location: Lancaster, England
Registered: 8 Apr 03

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 24 Jul 20 08:51

Quote: Jaggedone

My sincere apologies to KC Bell, but don't blame me, blame our glorious leader for not coming out immediately, calming the storm


It is right you should apologise for the "storm" you whipped up.

You are wholly to blame for trying to cause a fuss, as you like to do. Which is fine when it's just me, but not when you're trying to embarrass someone else.

If that hadn't been your intention, you would have sent me a private message and I could have explained to you directly, or looked into the matter and dealt with it appropriately.


Quote: Jaggedone

This would never have happened if Mark had reacted adequately.


I think my reaction was more than adequate, and more than was warranted, but I figured it best to allay any concerns by posting a response.

If you meant adequate to mean "in a timely manner", then, yes, I accept, if I had the opportunity to respond to this any sooner, I would have.

Dr. Billingsgate
Academic zero, literary hero


Location: Galapagos Islands
Registered: 22 Feb 10

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 24 Jul 20 13:16
Attempting to sanction Jaggedone is like telling Marmaduke to stop licking his balls.

Jaggedone
Writer
Jaggedone

Location: Back under the bridge!
Registered: 8 Apr 09

Forum Profile
Writer's Profile
Posted: 25 Jul 20 14:07
A compliment at last! LMFBO..Cheers Doc, love, health, and peace to you (seriously meant BTW, I would never dare to use sarcasm here again)..


Quote: Dr. Billingsgate

Attempting to sanction Jaggedone is like telling Marmaduke to stop licking his balls.



 
Any opinions expressed here are purely the opinions of the contributors and are not necessarily the opinions of The Spoof, its staff or the original writer of the spoof news/parody/satire story.

Go to top

Forum permissions

You are not logged in.

  • You cannot create new topics in this forum
  • You cannot post new messages in this forum
  • You cannot add polls
  • You cannot link to external images in this forum
  • You cannot upload images in this forum
  • You cannot upload files in this forum
Who is online?

There are no registered users currently online.

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more