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Forum Home / News Discussion / Julius Caesar gets attacked for eating sheep


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Forumbot
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Posted: 3 Mar 18 16:12

Extract from Story:
After having started off with humble beginnings, the ace comedian, actor and Roman General, Julius Caesar, went on to reach dizzying heights when suddently attacked by several close friends. His friends lead by Caesar's confidant, Brutus, accused him of sleeping with their sheep as well as stealing sausage, cheese and wine from their pantries. With a Comedy Nights Show to attend, he was dete.....

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victor nicholas
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Posted: 3 Mar 18 16:13
Someone deserves to be stabbed

"Vottznewpuzzykatt?"
Jaggedone
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Posted: 5 Mar 18 09:08
Get's a definite 'Nero' from me!

Nutters United...
Monkey Woods
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Posted: 5 Mar 18 14:11
The best Julius Caesar/sheep story I've read on here this week.

Also the worst I'm ever likely to.



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Jaggedone
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Posted: 5 Mar 18 15:17
Shagged...

Nutters United...
Erskin Quint
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Posted: 5 Mar 18 22:51
Dear Sploff,

Bah!

Bleats me! The incomprehensible sheep joke is the best bit. I've been fleeced!

A. Swaledale
North Yorkshire

PS maybe it got dropped on its way to the printers and the words got mixed up or something?

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Erskin Quint
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Posted: 5 Mar 18 22:52
And another thing. They didn't have sheep in Rome. I haven't seen any in any of the fillums.




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victor nicholas
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Posted: 5 Mar 18 23:53
I am now imagining Marlon Brando and James Mason dressed as sheep.


"Vottznewpuzzykatt?"
victor nicholas
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Posted: 6 Mar 18 02:16
So I find my end at the fine fists of friends
Rome was raised higher at my hand
Yet hunger for mutton turned gluttony
And caused those I once led to gather like crows
Stabbing their sharp beaks to taste blood



"Vottznewpuzzykatt?"
Erskin Quint
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Posted: 8 Mar 18 21:16
You need to go on and write the whole play now.



Quote: victor nicholas

So I find my end at the fine fists of friends
Rome was raised higher at my hand
Yet hunger for mutton turned gluttony
And caused those I once led to gather like crows
Stabbing their sharp beaks to taste blood


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victor nicholas
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Posted: 8 Mar 18 23:19 - Edited By: victor nicholas, 8 Mar 18 23:40
Erskin

Many thanks,

I felt it and the words followed, perhaps that's how it works.

"Vottznewpuzzykatt?"
Erskin Quint
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Posted: 9 Mar 18 21:05
Yes, spot on. I think you definitely have the touch.

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Dr. Billingsgate
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Posted: 11 Mar 18 23:27 - Edited By: Dr. Billingsgate, 11 Mar 18 23:31
It should be noted that the “Montana Pole” had yet to be invented when Julius “My Boy” Caesar was having carnal knowledge with sheep. Infact, Montana hadn’t been invented.

For those who have not read previously, the Montana Pole was first invented by a very lonely shepherd from that eponymous state who attached a mirror to the handle of a pitchfork. After mounting the sheep from behind (is there any other way), he would dangle the mirror in front of the sheep’s head to see if the sheep were smiling.

I'm trying to think, but nothing happens.
victor nicholas
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Posted: 12 Mar 18 02:58 - Edited By: victor nicholas, 12 Mar 18 02:58
I have had this story related to me with a slightly different ending, the mirror was dangled over the sheep's head so it could see if the shepherd holding the pole was smiling.

"Vottznewpuzzykatt?"
Dr. Billingsgate
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Posted: 12 Mar 18 14:16
Something may have been lost in the translation from Latin to English. As long as both were left smiling, who can complain?

I'm trying to think, but nothing happens.

 
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