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Run forward, throw the ball backwards

Brexit has a lot in common with Coventry too.

If British politics was to be compared to a sport, it would surely be welly-wanging?

Are you trying to bring the fine art of welly-wanging into disrepute?

Cricket makes a good Brexit analogy: lots of pointless obscure rules, endless debates about in and out, and a bunch of English dotards sipping warm beer while the wife shags a Frenchman.

So to recap, welly-wanging is based on lots of pointless obscure rules, endless debates about in and out, and a bunch of English dotards sipping warm beer while the wife shags a Frenchman.

Non, monsieur!

You fail to distinguish between the fine art of welly-wanging, and cricket. Let me explain welly-wanging. We all did it, didn't we? Trying to toss the welly as far as we can. It's basically the Olympic discus but with a welly. It should be an Olympic event and it probably will be in 2028 Beirut.

On the other hand, you have cricket. Pointless obscure rules, endless debates about in and out, and a bunch of English dotards sipping warm beer while the wife shags a Frenchman.

Sorry, I forgot what the original analogy was.

Thank you for explaining things, this is now utterley confusing. Your obvious mastery of French leads me to believe that you should keep your distance from the wives of Englishmen.

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Quote: Sir Geoffroy Cockface

Non, monsieur!

You fail to distinguish between the fine art of welly-wanging, and cricket. Let me explain welly-wanging. We all did it, didn't we? Trying to toss the welly as far as we can. It's basically the Olympic discus but with a welly. It should be an Olympic event and it probably will be in 2028 Beirut.

On the other hand, you have cricket. Pointless obscure rules, endless debates about in and out, and a bunch of English dotards sipping warm beer while the wife shags a Frenchman.

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Cursed roastbeef! You have penetrated my disguise.

I confess, I was sent here on a three part mission:
1. Infiltrate a top satirical website in the UK (I’m not sure I managed this)
2. Undermine “the will of the people” by writing witty satirical articles about the folly of Brexit (again, not sure I really did this)
3. Shag lots of English women with my big French cock. (Yup! Did that.)

What did you expect from someone with the name Geoffroy?

This is all very well, but what has any of this got to do with narwhals?

Narwhals like belugas and Boris Johnson have large forehead melons believed to be used to process sensory stimulation.