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Football would be more entertaining if they replaced the 'l' in goal with a 't'.**

Goatkeeper. A great goat, a spectacular goat, an own goat.

The goatkeeper's jersey. A goat kick. The goat line. The goatscorer.

Goat difference, eg Chesterfield are above Port Vale on goat difference.

Barrow beat Wrexham by three goats to two.

Good grief! Jenkins thunders a shot against the goatpost!

It's goats that count.

And so on.

** Or replaced the 't' in foot with an 'l'. Foolball anyone?

The Flat Cap Army has been replaced by the Fat Cat Army in the Premier League, and footy, once the sport of the working class, has become the sport of elitist scumbags scavenging off our love of the game...

It is astonishing that working class people still flock to see this elitist, multi-millionaire freak show, where the financial SKY is the limit for kicking a fucking ball for 90 minutes!

I have developed a "love-hate" relationship to the game because I'm too fucking old to stop watching the over-hyped crap that modern day players produce! I feel like I'm a hooked junkie!

EQ, watching a bunch of mountain goats clinging to a cliff edge can be more entertaining sometimes...And more therapeutic...

Why not watch grass roots football, sorry, foolball.

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Quote: Jaggedone

The Flat Cap Army has been replaced by the Fat Cat Army in the Premier League, and footy, once the sport of the working class, has become the sport of elitist scumbags scavenging off our love of the game...

It is astonishing that working class people still flock to see this elitist, multi-millionaire freak show, where the financial SKY is the limit for kicking a fucking ball for 90 minutes!

I have developed a "love-hate" relationship to the game because I'm too fucking old to stop watching the over-hyped crap that modern day players produce! I feel like I'm a hooked junkie!

EQ, watching a bunch of mountain goats clinging to a cliff edge can be more entertaining sometimes...And more therapeutic...

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Grass roots football is where a set of footballers smoke weed while trying to calculate the square roots of various randomly generated numbers, with the winner being the one to get the most correct.

It would revolutionise the game, that's for sure.

Of course they have walking football now.

Now if that were to be adopted professionally worldwide, that would be quite something.

At present, it's only the English team that plays it.

A foot in the mouth is worth a kick in the balls

A SOCK in the mouth is worth 'Er in the bath

Confucius said

"Jumpers for goatposts."

"And, I don't know what you think, Brian, but that third goat was really something special."

"Chelsea in full flow now, and bearing down on the Burnley goat."


Yes, I see how this could work...

Some wonderful goats to enjoy there, Gary. Very much so, in fact.

And now back to tonight's match, with the Aris Salonika goatkeeper keeping Bayern at bay almost single-handedly, as his team cling on to their slender single-goat advantage.

And let's not forget that Aris still hold that precious away goat.

Yes indeed. Mind you, it might have been a different story if Robben hadn't spurned that second-minute open goat, Alan. The goat was gaping. Oh yes indeed.

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Quote: Monkey Woods

"Jumpers for goatposts."

"And, I don't know what you think, Brian, but that third goat was really something special."

"Chelsea in full flow now, and bearing down on the Burnley goat."


Yes, I see how this could work...

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I feel the need to inform the RSPCA of this despicable usage of goats being booted at during footy games...

He's hoofed that goat from the edge of his own goat area.

Remember, it's the team with the most goats that wins.

I've never seen a goat come so soon after such bad play, he was dribbling all over the place.

And, of course, the inevitable:

"It only takes a second to score a goat."