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By author at 00:00 1 Jan 2000
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George Thomas Teddy Abe
"America for ever!"
"Yes, this is set in rock"
"And stone too!"
"Any left a message for the new comers?"
By Inchcock at 12:37 06 Jan 2011
I thought we were The Rolling Stones
I thought we were The Fab Four
I thought we were Led Zeppelin
I thought we were The Founding Fathers of The United States of America!
By IN SEINE at 13:22 06 Jan 2011
Rumour has it that Obama is coming here!
No chance!
He will HAVE to be a little BOULDER!!
There goes the neighbourhood!!
By IN SEINE at 13:38 06 Jan 2011
I'm still George!
I'm not Mary...
...and I'm not Zuzu
You're ALL STONED!!!!!!!
By IN SEINE at 13:48 06 Jan 2011
Did you know we are the eighth wonder of the world?
No... what makes you say that?
We're the greatest rock group in the world!
.of course, I think we should be called.........THE STONE ROSES
By IN SEINE at 16:33 06 Jan 2011
I thought there were only three of us.
George you are thinking of the 3 stooges again.
George? Weren't you in the last Caption Competition?
No, that was a different George. There's more than one George in the world.
By Lady Godiva at 17:37 06 Jan 2011
I feel like a nobody.
We are all 'nobodies'.
This sucks big time. I have an itchy nose and can't scratch it.
The writers are running out of things to say when it gets to me so stop whining
By Lady Godiva at 17:40 06 Jan 2011
Anyone feel like going to The Hard Rock Cafe?
Stone me! Is that the only place you go?
Marbellous conversation, I DON'T think.
Last again! Nothing to add.
By Lady Godiva at 17:45 06 Jan 2011
Chins up. Only 4 more weeks or so to go.
Yeah! Don't go losing your heads guys.
My necks bloody stiff.
Don't tell lies...you don't even HAVE a neck.
By Lady Godiva at 18:08 06 Jan 2011
I'm the tallest one here.
I'm second tallest.
I'm third tallest.
OK so I'm a bloody midget. So what?
By Lady Godiva at 18:09 06 Jan 2011
It breaks my heart to see the current state of the nation
ERR... it's made of stone!
Nobody cares any more
YEP... they take us for GRANITE!!!
By IN SEINE at 18:48 06 Jan 2011
4. Of course I did....I don't lie...a cent went MUCH further in those days!
3. I don't believe ya George!
2. I once skimmed a pebble only half way across the Delaware and it sank!
1. Now George, tell the truth did you REALLY throw a coin across the Delaware?
By IN SEINE at 19:31 06 Jan 2011
I'm on a $1 bill
I'm on a $2 bill
I'm on a ...$400,000 bill
I'm on a $5 bill
By Abel Rodriguez at 20:14 06 Jan 2011
I have a state named after me
I had a TV sit-com named after me
I look like a young handsome Geraldo Rivera
I had a car, a penny, and logs named after me
By Abel Rodriguez at 20:16 06 Jan 2011
I can see Nebraska
I can see Iowa
I can see Abe's nose hairs
I can see Wyoming
By Abel Rodriguez at 20:19 06 Jan 2011
I'd like a beer
I'd like some wine
Margarita, the White House maid?
I'd like a Margarita
By Abel Rodriguez at 20:21 06 Jan 2011
I'm broke!
I'm skint!
Don't you mean Borrasic Lint'??? (as London Cockneys would say)
...or even 'JURASSIC FLINT' (..I'll get my coat)
By IN SEINE at 20:23 06 Jan 2011
Why is Lincoln by himself?
I guess he's just shy
My goodness someone needs a nap
Leave me the eff alone
By Abel Rodriguez at 20:25 06 Jan 2011
What the hell is bling bling?
What the hell is fa shizzle ma nizzle?
What the hell is booty?
I don't know but I betcha the slaves do
By Abel Rodriguez at 20:28 06 Jan 2011
That Lowton chap is pure crazy, I can see he's preparing the NEXT caption comp.
Already?
He's doing 101 Dalmations next
We could be stuck up here for months then AWW SHUCKS!
By IN SEINE at 20:36 06 Jan 2011
Mark should be up here with us coz he's a hard headed bugger at times
Be careful what you say George. I heard he sometimes reads these things.
Ah...but it's not really George who SAID it, is it?
You are right! But I heard Lady G's daughter is writing for her today.....
By Lady Godiva at 21:28 06 Jan 2011
Someone I think it was Abe, said Lady G's daughter is writing for her today.
Nah! She just said that because she didn't want to get into trouble off Mark.
What? Just for calling him a hard-headed bugger....but he IS.
Careful else he's likely to leave us up here 'till Easter you idiot.
By Lady Godiva at 21:41 06 Jan 2011
I'm thinking of auditioning for 'Talking Heads' but what is it?
Damned if I know. I'm auditioning for 'Greatest Face at Rushmore'
My agent is sending me to audition for Best American President.How 'bout you Abe
I have a 'sitting' for a sculpture of myself sitting in a very big chair.
By Lady Godiva at 00:16 07 Jan 2011
On a clear day
Wall Drug, whoop-dee-dee.
Burma-Shave.
You can see
By Amethyst Ryder at 06:32 07 Jan 2011
I'm trying not to laugh at some of these crazy captions
I know what you mean. It's hard to keep a straight face.
But I just don't 'get' some of them. Must be 'new age' humour
No Teddy. You are just as bloody thick as two short planks.
By Lady Godiva at 15:40 07 Jan 2011
I heard we are all booked in for an 'acid peel' next week.
Aah! You mean 'acid rain' is on it's way once more.
Well, last time it didn't improve MY complection at all.
Mine either....I ended up more pock-marked than before the 'face peel'.
By Lady Godiva at 15:41 07 Jan 2011
I spy with my little eye something beginning with "S"
Why does he always pick sibbilant letters
Why can't we stop this and join a rock band instead...."Teddy and the Rockstars"
This is unfair on dyslexics
By Mikethelad at 16:09 07 Jan 2011
Am I the only one here wearing a bloody wig?
I do believe so old chap. Don't worry though,you'll never have a 'bad hair day.
Also, you'll save a helluva lot of cash not buying shampoo and condidtioner.
That's what I like about wearing my BIG hat, it hides a multitude of bad 'do's.
By Lady Godiva at 21:02 07 Jan 2011
What an absolutely beautiful blue sky we have today.
Yes, this is the type of day I would just love to be alive.
Personally I like a bit of cloud to shade me from the sun.
What a load of cobblers. I ache for intelligent conversation.
By Lady Godiva at 21:05 07 Jan 2011
my place or yours dear?
Oh yours love, he's here again
You bitch, I saw him first!
Ooh! arc at the queen!
By armfeetandtoe at 23:48 07 Jan 2011
Abe, my friend...do you see what I see
Well, do not ask me and Teddy right! coz we are looking somewhere else.
And even WE are not even looking in the same direction Thomas my friend.
George, I DO see what you see but what the hell is it-is it a bird or a plane.
By Lady Godiva at 02:23 08 Jan 2011
I wanted to be a vet when I grew up - but it did not happen.
I always wanted to be a pop star but I was born way before my time.
Me - I wanted to be a ballet dance but my parents were appalled-so-here I am.
You all need complain - I wanted to be a WOMAN - obviously it never happened.
By Lady Godiva at 03:11 08 Jan 2011
Sitting here watching
Teddy, say something really profound...
Burma-Shave.
the wheels go round...
By Amethyst Ryder at 09:26 08 Jan 2011
South Dakota,
I could really use some--
Burma-Shave.
What a gas,
By Amethyst Ryder at 11:09 08 Jan 2011
1. Who was that crawling all over us?
2. Cary Grant, apparently.
3. Bloody rude!
4. Yeah, but that Eva Marie Saint was well fit, man.
By Ellis Ian Fields at 11:57 08 Jan 2011
For cryin' out loud! Who farted?
He who smelt it dealt it!
But he who denied it supplied it.
Bloody silent but deadly!
By Ellis Ian Fields at 12:01 08 Jan 2011
Anyone fancy an indian?
Could you rephrase that please George?
Christ! You know what he means Tom stop being so picky
Don't worry about him. He's just a chip off the old block
By Lady Godiva at 12:14 08 Jan 2011
Nobody knows...
Nobody knows but...
Burma-Shave.
the trouble I've seen...
By Amethyst Ryder at 12:46 08 Jan 2011
Look at that fellow driving ninety-eight,
But now he's "late."
Burma-Shave.
Wanted to be on time,
By Amethyst Ryder at 14:08 08 Jan 2011
Roses are red,
Teddy, you know what you have to do.
Burma-Shave.
Violets are blue,
By Amethyst Ryder at 14:10 08 Jan 2011
That sun is hot!
Or at least a nice glass of lemonade.
Burma-Shave.
Give me some shade!
By Amethyst Ryder at 14:10 08 Jan 2011
Here's a little song I wrote...
I get by with a little help from my friends...
Burma-Shave.
I know it's not much, but it's the best I can do...
By Amethyst Ryder at 14:12 08 Jan 2011
I started a revolution, and all I got was this lousy tourist attraction.
I slept around, and all I got was... well... I used to smile a lot.
Is this where I'm supposed to say, "Burma-Shave"?
I led people out of slavery, and all I got was a piece of lead.
By Amethyst Ryder at 14:24 08 Jan 2011
Ride 'em, cowboy!
That looks like a mighty nice tail--
--gate. Burma-Shave.
Hit the trail!
By Amethyst Ryder at 14:26 08 Jan 2011
Here we sit...
idiots with cameras clicking away...
Burma-Shave.
day after day...
By Amethyst Ryder at 14:32 08 Jan 2011
Faster than lightning!
Took a bad turn, now he's six feet under.
Burma-Shave.
Louder than thunder!
By Amethyst Ryder at 14:35 08 Jan 2011
Ever feel bad about how we screwed over the Indians?
Yeah.
What?
Yeah.
By Amethyst Ryder at 14:39 08 Jan 2011
I say, gentlemen, let's start a petition to put FDR up here with us!
FDR! The man who put the Roosevelt name on the map of American history.
Thanks a lot, you guys.
That's a terrific idea, George. FDR was one of the greatest presidents ever!
By Amethyst Ryder at 14:46 08 Jan 2011
"I was a Mason you know?"
"So was I!"
"Gutzon Borglum, our sculptor was a stone-mason, thanks heavens!"
"Clever Teddy, clever!"
By Inchcock at 17:26 08 Jan 2011
You're the flower of my heart, Sweet Adeline...
...my Aaaa... daaaahhh... liiiine.
...my Aaaa... daaaahhh... liiiine.
...my Aaaa... daaaahhh... liiiine.
By Amethyst Ryder at 11:02 09 Jan 2011
"I liked Chamber music, how about you lot?"
"I was keen on jazz!"
"Classical for me!
"I used to like Soul music, but I've grown to like rock lately..."
By Inchcock at 15:01 09 Jan 2011
What the hell is this Burma Shave thing of which you speak
Stupid bloody brushless shaving cream from years in our future. We're long dead
Well how the hell are we to know what it is?
It's just so the writers can Google a bit, coz they're bored.
By Lady Godiva at 21:39 09 Jan 2011
I see the shite got beat again. How I laughed when that gobsjite got sent off.
They'll be pointing the finger our way again, the delusional pricks.
I hope they get a right twatting next weekend in the Derby match.
He's a miserable fucker that's the boss, I hear he's a Homosexual
By reidy at 00:24 10 Jan 2011
4. I cannot tell a lie - it was Abe
3. Nor me
2. It wasn't me
1 -somebody farted again?
By Lynton at 03:49 10 Jan 2011
Christ I didn't know that it would take so long to pose for an album cover
Christ I didn't know that it would take so long to pose for an album cover
Christ I didn't know that it would take so long to pose for an album cover
Christ I didn't know that it would take so long to pose for an album cover
By Lynton at 03:50 10 Jan 2011
DeepPurlple?
That's what they said
What do they do then?
The call themselves a 'Rock Group'
By Lynton at 03:52 10 Jan 2011
Can you feel someone crawling around
I did earlier on
Where did he go?
North by NorthWest in my judgement
By Lynton at 03:54 10 Jan 2011
I sure miss superman
used to come here to be alone
nice boy
was it something we said or somethin you did Teddy?
By Lynton at 04:18 10 Jan 2011
How long we been here now
weeelll quite a time
at least 70yrs now
Doncha think it's time we got a little shut-eye?
By Lynton at 04:25 10 Jan 2011
'How I gone gangster' is my favourite anagram of my name, what's yours?
'Smother Jane's off', it brings back memories... ahh
'Ode to three lovers' is mine, brings back memories too!
Mine's...'Gangrene Wigs Hoot!' - now how about I spy with my little eye next?
By Inchcock at 07:50 10 Jan 2011
"Oh my God, look at that over there!"
"Screw You!"
"Up Yours Washington!"
"Oh yeah, I see it. Nice!"
By Trip Nasti at 13:54 10 Jan 2011
Where the HELL are we ? SOUTH DAKOTA ?!?!?
I heard a rumor that the guy who carved us was a member of the Ku Klux Klan...
I gotta tell you, Abe, I'm harder than a diamond in an ice storm right now...
Dude, if you touch my junk, I'm gonna have you arrested...
By SpaceElevator at 23:46 10 Jan 2011
Is it just me, or is this country full of lunatics?
D'ya mean religious nuts blaming dead birds on the Don't Ask Don't Tell repeal?
Or d'ya mean homicidal kids carrying concealed weapons and bullets from Walmart?
(I'll be happy as long as those birds quit sh*tting on my head...)
By SpaceElevator at 00:35 11 Jan 2011
I've heard that it's not just the USA that's full of loonies.
I know...I watch Coronation Street and Eastenders on the telly.
Yup...loonies are all over the world They just speak different languages.
You mean America IS NOT THE WORLD? I'm in shock, I truly am.
By Lady Godiva at 02:09 11 Jan 2011
"Have you lot heard about the internet?"
"Oh yes, I think we are mentioned on it!"
"I haven't seen us on it!"
"Yes, take a look on 'Facebook'!"
By Inchcock at 06:47 11 Jan 2011
It's a toss up who is the most popular of us!"
"I'm the prettiest!"
"I'm the rugged one!"
"Heads... I win!"
By Inchcock at 06:59 11 Jan 2011
I asked the stonemasons to give me a little head
What did they say?
No, but he got his rocks off
I'm guessing nothing polite
By IainB at 09:14 11 Jan 2011
I can see your mums house from here Teddy
I can see your nose hair from here George
I can see your monument from here Abe
I can see that couple having a shag
By armfeetandtoe at 10:22 11 Jan 2011
If I
a
Rich Man
Was
By Mikethelad at 20:27 11 Jan 2011
Can you see Arizona from here?
Where the cross-hairs are
Next to that Safeway store
Yes look over there where Sarah Palin is pointing her rifle
By Mikethelad at 20:29 11 Jan 2011
I'm thinking Arby's
National Treasure 2 sucked!
I can't see anything past Lincoln's nose
I need to scratch my rocks!
By ESB at 06:40 12 Jan 2011
"Ha Ha Ha Ha!"
"Staying Alive, Staying Alive!"
"Staying Aaaallllliiiivvveeeeeee!"
"Ha ha ha ha!"
By armfeetandtoe at 17:59 12 Jan 2011
"Do you ever get the feeling"
"Same old cherry"
"YES! WE ARE BEING WATCHED!"
"I know what your going to say"
By armfeetandtoe at 20:36 12 Jan 2011
God, I can't feel my legs!
(Gives a stony stare)
Your'e crowding me, fellas!
If we all lean forward together, we can fall outa here! One... two.... THREE!!
By Esmerelda11 at 00:37 13 Jan 2011
Lord, this view gets tedious!
I know. And no broads.....
Fellas, you're still crowding me!
Hey, is that a burger van down there? I could kill for a Big Mac.....
By Esmerelda11 at 00:40 13 Jan 2011
Lord, this view gets tedious!
I know. Oh for some hot chicks!
Fellas, you're still crowding me here.
Is that a burger van down there? I could kill for a Big Mac.
By Esmerelda11 at 00:41 13 Jan 2011
I need as lift to the hairdresser's, I have an appointment for a trim.
You are wearing a freaking WIG....send it by Puralator or something.
I have my very own hairstylist and he is so sweet, he gives me a massage too
Oh my Darwin theory...who is the GAY one here. One in 4 guys are gay......
By Lady Godiva at 01:51 13 Jan 2011
I do hear that there is a BLACK president now who is 'in charge' of USA
Yeah..well he can't be carved in stone can he...coz there's no black stone
Could be coal though...couldn't it?
Stop that crap else you may just get banned for not being politically correct.
By Lady Godiva at 01:54 13 Jan 2011
Only fools and horses come by here to look at us. Sad really.
Only fools and horses come by here to look at us.
George just said that you bleeding idiot.
What do you expect Teddy? These people are Spoof writers....be patient.,
By Lady Godiva at 01:56 13 Jan 2011
Hey, have you ever heard of the 'One Star Bandit'?
Yeah, I've heard of such a person. He/she is a bit sick in the head I hear.
Now..WHY would you say THAT Tom?
I know! Animosity. It takes MORE time to ONE STAR a writer than to 3 star them
By Lady Godiva at 01:59 13 Jan 2011
Gee whiz....have you seen the snow that has fallen on Ontario?
Yes, but they shouldn't be complaining because at least they are PREPARED for it
I know! I feel sorry for the folks facing floods. How about you Abe?.
Sorry..no comment...Eastenders is on...gotta watch it. Talk later.
By Lady Godiva at 02:02 13 Jan 2011
There is so much crap on television these days dontcha think?
Shoot - I can't even see a t.v . screen from here.
Me neither Tom.
Hey...don't worry. I can see it and it's a load of crap as George said.
By Lady Godiva at 03:35 13 Jan 2011
Did you all cough up for your lottery payments this week coz I feel lucky.
You feel who the hell you want George - we haven't won a dollar in years.
Abe - I'm so fed up of talking to those two idiots. How about we ignore them?
Sounds great to me Teddy. I'm getting so bored with their inane conversation.
By Lady Godiva at 03:40 13 Jan 2011
Hey Tom, do you have the feeling tht Teddy and Abe are ignoring us?
Yeah but I don't give a flying f**k coz I'm getting bored up here myself.
Abe, did you watch Dr. Phil today where he met the man with the great voice?
Yes! I hope he helps the fella and isn't just trying to make another quick buck
By Lady Godiva at 03:44 13 Jan 2011
My best quote was "Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder"...
Mine was "A coward is much more exposed to quarrels than a man of spirit"
My best one was "A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college"
"Oh shut up!"
By Inchcock at 07:19 14 Jan 2011
"'Soccer feet can' represent us all!" say's Inchcock
So can 'Coca reef scent! he told me"
And 'Cafe cents core' too!" - seems they're Anagrams of 'concrete Faces'?
Anagrams again! - Someone tell the idiot we're made of rock not cement, Strewth!
By Inchcock at 17:05 14 Jan 2011
I'm thinking of getting a Gordon Ramsay hair transplant
Be careful who you go to coz a fella had WANKER put on his head by a crazy doc.
Well the doc. WAS gonna put DICKHEAD on but didn't have enough time.
At least WE don't have to worry about losing our hair.
By Lady Godiva at 21:29 14 Jan 2011
Hmm! I'm pretty good-looking for a man my age I think.
Think what the hell you like, just don't say it out loud you narcassistic sod.
I don't think you spelled 'nararcassistic' correctly. Vain is easier to spell.
Oh sod off arsehole. Who the hell cares...no-ones reading these things anyway.
By Lady Godiva at 23:46 14 Jan 2011
I think I'm good-looking for a man my age.
Think what the hell you like, just don't say it out loud you narcassistic sod.
I think you spelled narcassistic incorrectly. Vain is easier to spell.
Christ...stop being so bloody picky. No-one's reading these things anyway.
By Lady Godiva at 23:50 14 Jan 2011
I wonder if someone will carve another one of these with more modern presidents.
Probably- but people are too busy to bother with this sort of crap these days.
Hey! They'll have to find some black or brown rock for that coloured president
Barock the Barmy. Yes! I've heard of him. Don't think he'll last though.
By Lady Godiva at 23:53 14 Jan 2011
Repeat after me, Silk, Silk, Silk.
Silk, Silk, Silk - I know this one....What do cows drink?
Milk, milk, milk.
Got ya Teddy!! Cows drink water....Good one George and Tom.
By Lady Godiva at 23:55 14 Jan 2011
I'm sick of having your head on my shoulder...
I am a parrot who know.
?
?
By GMsrgr8 at 13:10 15 Jan 2011
Next time someone points a camera up to us shall we all smile?
I wonder how they'd react.
It would sure break this boredom.
Boredom? I could never grow bored of this view.
By Tommy Twinkle at 19:30 15 Jan 2011
Sunday already. Hell, how time flies.
Yup!
True!
Tomorrow's Monday. How predictable is that!
By Lady Godiva at 15:12 16 Jan 2011
That sky looks too blue to be true.
I figure we've been photoshopped. No sky is ever THAT blue.
Why would anyone block out God's own great creation though?
An atheist with a computer can do anything these days.
By Lady Godiva at 15:14 16 Jan 2011
I just saw Abe's lips move.
You've been staring at the computer screen too long.
Yes - and now you are even talking to yourself.
Well, a Spoof Writer's life can be such a lonely one.
By Lady Godiva at 15:15 16 Jan 2011
I wonder where everyone is today. Not a tourist in sight or on site..
I hear 'The Angel of The North' is a pretty big attraction these days.
Isn't there something going on in Trafalgar Square lately?
Well, wherever it's going on...it ain't 'ere. That much is bloody obvious.
By Lady Godiva at 18:18 16 Jan 2011
"The
ollldddddMilllll
Streammmmmm!
Milllllll
By Bureau at 23:07 16 Jan 2011
Why do couples get romantic here?
Kinda kinky!
Probably the heads.
They know we're watching.
By Bureau at 23:10 16 Jan 2011
I can see for miles & miles & miles & miles.
Who were they?
Yes.
But you cannot sing like the originals.
By Bureau at 23:13 16 Jan 2011
Are we what is meant in 'Rock of Ages'?
No, we are Rock of Sages'
As long as we're not Mint Rock
Or Edinburgh Rock. Och Aye the noo!
By Lady Godiva at 23:30 16 Jan 2011
I feel someone chiselling away at my backside.
It's those bloody mountain climbers again. I feel their clamps in MY arse too.
I've just farted...that should keep them away for a while.
Don't bank on it Teddy...they'll just continue climbing- covered in dust.
By Lady Godiva at 23:45 16 Jan 2011
Gosh, I feel that if any of us smiled our faces would crack.
Well, I'm not going first. How about you Teddy?
You've got to be bloody joking Tom. Anyway I AM smiling.
Can't see for that bloody caterpillar on your upper lip boyo.
By Lady Godiva at 23:47 16 Jan 2011
Well, we're at the top - and you know what they say lads....
Yup, the only direction we can go now...is...DOWN
Bloody morbid pair you are...try looking on the bright side for once.
IS there a bright side? Even the Spoof Writers have been ignoring us all lately
By Lady Godiva at 15:34 17 Jan 2011
Stoned again!
If we all sing will it be called Rock music
Why are all the best rock singers dead
Not in the Iranian sense I hope
By Mikethelad at 16:05 17 Jan 2011
I don't like the way our bubbles are set out. It looks like Abe should be NEXT
I know but he isn't. I'm second. Weird innit?
Yeah! I'm third but it looks like I should be last.
I'm last and it looks like I should be second. Someone tell Mark PLEASE
By Lady Godiva at 16:51 17 Jan 2011
Do you think Mark set our bubbles out this way just to confuse everyone.
I'm sure he did. He's a little bugger he is..always up to some prank or other.
It's not fair coz most of the writers are much older than he is and get confused
Well, it'll come to HIM one day, and some young punk will be there to 'get him'.
By Lady Godiva at 16:53 17 Jan 2011
I'm speechless! Anyone have a good joke?
Yeah! What do you call four dead presidents carved in stone?
I give up. What DO you call 4 dead presidents carved in stone
Anything you like,coz they can't hear you.They're STONE DEAF! LG could SELL that
By Lady Godiva at 17:59 17 Jan 2011
Do you think they got the idea from us
What, that film
The hiils have eyes!
Yes, its erm.....
By armfeetandtoe at 21:19 17 Jan 2011
Anyone fancy a drink?
Yes! I'd love a nice cocktail.( Now read Teddy next)
It's not gonna happen. We have to stay stone-cold sober up here-(next is Abe)
Ha bleeding ha! That's so funny I forgot to laugh.
By Lady Godiva at 13:27 18 Jan 2011
Ho! Hum! I wish Ricky Gervais would show up and give us a laugh.
Me too. People say he was rather too outlandishly 'cruel' on The Globes
Yeah! Most of them enjoy GIVING it, especially when they're drunk , but ....
I know what you are going to say Teddy...they can't TAKE it, sober OR drunk.
By Lady Godiva at 15:43 18 Jan 2011
Well that's it! I'm having a snooze. Wake me up if any writers come along.
OK. I think they're all firing blanks at the minute or doing 'research'.
Research?? You mean "reading the papers" for ideas.
Well, I hope they bring some bloody new ones here and damn quick(ly).
By Lady Godiva at 17:17 18 Jan 2011
Oh. Look! There's a writer down there.
Maybe we're in luck. He might look up, see our empty bubbles and write for us.
Damn it. He's gone now. Hey! Come back! We need you.
Don't waste your breath Teddy. They think they're all too good for us now.
By Lady Godiva at 17:20 18 Jan 2011
Where have all the writers gone? Long time passing. Where have all the writers
Long time ago. Gone to the Approval Centre every one...
None to left to come along.
When will we ever learn? When will we EEEVVVERRRR learn.
By Lady Godiva at 18:06 18 Jan 2011
Do you think anyone will come along and carve us some bodies one day?
I hope so. I also hope we get to choose the one we want. I want Tom Cruise's
Really? I fancy Arnie Schwarzenegger's.
Hey, are you sure you two ARE hetrosexual? Sounds kinky to me.
By Lady Godiva at 20:11 18 Jan 2011
Some of those writers are talking about us on the discussion forum.
It can only be GOOD stuff - so don't panic.
I wonder why they won't come HERE and give us a hand or rather 'a few words'?
Beats me Teddy. Maybe they think we are 'beneath' them when are up here.
By Lady Godiva at 21:52 18 Jan 2011
Hey Thomas! Can you believe those Texas School Book Committee assholes?
Are you asking me if they are assholes or if I believe them?
For fucking crying out loud Tom, quick parsing your words already.
I've got a headache..
By Asheville Jack at 22:27 18 Jan 2011
Yeah! What's the point of censoring a bloody 'classic' that be used as a tool?
Yeah! A tool to teach what " shouldn't" be happening today. Right Teddy?
Totally stinks. Are they members of a clan or something. Silly buggers.
Well if they are - it's sure not a Scottish one - they'd be out on their arses.
By Lady Godiva at 23:09 18 Jan 2011
I like your voice and I think you could go far. It's a yes from me.
There's no doubt about it, you really do have the X-Factor - it's a yes from me.
All I can say is WOW! It's a yes from me.
You can't sing, you are ugly, you have no rhythm. A big fat no from me!
By Mark James at 09:17 19 Jan 2011
All you need is love...
...all you need is love...
You do realise that we're not *that* Fab Four, don't you?
...all together now...
By Mark James at 09:44 19 Jan 2011
"They're going to give us a face lift soon, wonder if they'll use chisels!"
"Stone-grinders, stone-files, rasps, rifflers and drags most likely!"
"No, they dare not risk damaging us, were National Monuments!"
"Getting the face mask and lipstick on will be interesting!"
By Inchcock at 15:33 19 Jan 2011
"I was President, Now it is evident, I'm not so resplendent!"
"I'm still resplendent, was a President, but now feel a little despondent!"
"I too was President, and a little decadent, now I'm just a Rushmore resident!"
"On you lot now I am dependent, by accident, so let's not set a precedent!"
By Inchcock at 10:31 20 Jan 2011
Hey Tom, What's Teddy's REAL name? Bit daft 'Teddy' isn't it?
Haven't a bleeding clue. I'll ask him. Teddy what's your REAL name
Adolf!
He's having you on lads. His real name is Pooh! As in Winnie The.....
By Lady Godiva at 12:04 20 Jan 2011
Look at that dirty scrubber takin her cloths off
Where! Where!
Thats my sister you bastards!
Over there under that tree!
By armfeetandtoe at 21:13 22 Jan 2011
Bleeding slow today. Wonder what's going on in the world?
Saturday....football, soccer, ice hockey, Robbie Burns night, shopping, boozing.
Mebbe some of he writers will pop by when they've had a few.
Christ. I didn't realize we were THIS boring.
By Lady Godiva at 22:58 22 Jan 2011
Me, and my
Shadows
The avenue
Walkin darn
By armfeetandtoe at 23:00 22 Jan 2011
I'm,.... puttin on
me top hat
An go to sleep!
shut the fuck up!
By armfeetandtoe at 23:03 22 Jan 2011
Look, here comes that new brown president Rock Barmy or something.
Oh my god. Don't let him see me. I said something not nice about him last week
I think he's quite a good looking fella myself. Nice butt.
What are you scared of...that he'll turn you to stone.....you idiot..!
By Lady Godiva at 15:02 23 Jan 2011
Heads up! Tour bus arriving from the right!
Another crowd of blue rinsed ladies in polyester pant suits carrying big purses.
Yeah! Like Barbie Dolls expcept they look more like rejected old Biker Molls.
I've often wondered if they turn those women out in a big factory somewhere.
By Lady Godiva at 15:05 23 Jan 2011
"ROCK OF AGES, CLEFT FOR ME....!!"
and me
and me
me too!!!!
By IN SEINE at 09:19 24 Jan 2011
I spy with my little eye.....
oh for fucks sake
It'll be "t" for tree again! he always picks bloody tree
Well you always pick rock in rock paper scissors
By Dirk Scare-Monger at 13:59 25 Mar 2011
Do I look like myself?
Don't move! It hurts my neck!
I wanted to me on top!
You people disgust me.
By Aspartame Boy at 05:31 08 May 2011
Which one of you idiots came up with this as our Halloween costume?
It'll be a chick magnet, trust me. Women love Presidents.
OK, which one of you just grabbed my balls?
Sorry, I was just trying to scratch an itch on my leg.
By Pariah at 02:27 13 May 2011
say, did you guys see that cute blonde taking photos of us?
Yeah, she came here last week. Damn fine ass but!
There goes a buffalo. Quick, where's my rifle?
Four score and....four score and....how does that speech go again?
By whatinthe world at 10:08 28 Jul 2011
Obama should give us a coat of paint. I feel naked up here.
Speak for yourself, George. I like our rustic look.
Well, bust my britches, I think I just peed myself. Dammit!!
Four score and....four score and....how does that speech go again?
By whatinthe world at 10:12 28 Jul 2011
Say, Tom, can you go down to the local seven eleven and get me a sandwich?
I can't, George. Don't you realise we're made of stone.
I just spied me the best lookin' damsel this side of the Mason-Dixon. Whooee!
Four score and....four score and....how does that speech go again?
By whatinthe world at 10:18 28 Jul 2011
If Obama doesn't raise the debt ceiling, we could be dynamited to pieces.
Wow, what a blast! Sorry, poor choice of words.
I've got an itch on my cheek like you wouldn't believe. Somebody, please!!
Four score and....four score and....how does that speech go again?
By whatinthe world at 10:24 28 Jul 2011
So the other guy says "That was why she wore pink".
That joke was hope less, George. Have you seen a shrink?
I saw one yesterday holding a video camera. His wife was a tranny.
What's a tranny? Is that a new political party?
By whatinthe world at 10:30 28 Jul 2011
I can't tell a word of a lie, although it helps when I do.
I'm gonna buy me some slaves and do some wuppin.
"I'll be your...teddy bear". I just love Elvis.
uh, oh, are we there yet?
By whatinthe world at 12:40 17 Aug 2011
You know this country WAS one of the finest in the world.
Yeah and then those stockbrokers spoiled it all.
I've never been the same since they turned me into stone.
(snore)...uh..did somebody say something?
By whatinthe world at 06:55 29 May 2012
Okay, does anybody know "My Old Kentucky Home"?
George, do we have to keep singin'? I wanna watch some porn.
Speakin' of porn, look who just showed up. Kim Kardashian! My life is complete.
When I catch up with Wilkes-Booth, he'll wish he was dead.
By whatinthe world at 07:02 29 May 2012
say, why don't we go for a holiday to Miami? Sun,tequila and girls!
Hey yeah, that'd be cool guys, lets go George.
Can't make it gents. Got a date with Betty White.
You know George you can only be part right some of the time.
By whatinthe world at 07:08 29 May 2012
Stop rubbing your body against me, Tom.
Its not me, its Ted.
He's got no idea that boy. George, just keep smiling.
I'm so depressed!
By whatinthe world at 11:42 30 May 2012
Look at 'em down there, guys...
Trying to Google us, boys...
HEY DOWN THERE! Google "ignorant tourist"!
As though we had any choice.
By Mario at 19:39 01 Oct 2012
Here we are. Still "rockin' out" after all these years.
I'm not so much rockin' , but definitely "rollin" (over . . .)
Rock on.
I feel stoned
By Tony Bagodonutz at 08:12 27 Sep 2013
3. It sounded great. I just wish I could have turned my head to see it.
2. Haha. Remember last week when the fat people did it in his hair?
4. I hate you guys!
1. There's bird poop on Teddy's nose.
By Butch32 at 01:04 29 Nov 2013
MMM, that feels good, Tommy.
It feels a little tight in there. Hey Teddy, can you pass the K-Y jelly?
Sorry, I'm a rough rider. Lubricants are for wimps.
This is exactly why I wanted the Declaration of Independence.
By Dick Sheerer at 06:36 11 Jun 2015
I've never seen anyone so full of themselves and now I'm stuck here forever.
You should be honored to be even in the same mountain range as me.
How would YOU like to be stuck under his armpit? At least you're not as close.
Having to listen to that arrogant asshole Jefferson forever-please just kill me!
By Al N. at 05:20 25 Dec 2016
Can you believe this Trump guy?
You better get used to him, he's planning on adding his likeness here.
Who's going to go for that?
Well, he's financing it to happen in the dead of night.
By Al N. at 21:01 17 Jan 2017
So did you hear that Trump is going to bulldoze Teddy and add himself instead/?
It's not like he wrote the Declaration of Independence or something.
Hey! I'm right here! I can hear you!
I always wondered what he was doing here anyway.
By Al N. at 17:35 22 Mar 2017
I didn't think anyone could disgrace the presidency more than Bush, Jr.
I agree, and Franklin Pierce set a high bar for bad presidents.
Not to mention a bad precedent for drinkers-in-general.
And I thought I had it bad with Pierce, Buchanan, and Fillmore coming before me.
By Al N. at 00:54 10 Aug 2017
Well, we gave it a good run!
Well, it looks like it's YOUR Republicans doing all the damage.
Hey, don't blame Abe! These Republicans are a lot dumber than in our day!
To think I went through the whole Civil War just so racist could take over!
By Al N. at 02:50 22 Sep 2017
I was ballin' as I came up
I'll be ballin when I'm old
Spittin up gray stuff
Ballin when I changed up
By Ryan Eggensperger at 17:08 28 Oct 2017
If I would've known the American People would be dumb enough to elect Trump, I..
How many times do we have to hear that story?
I would trade my Nobel Prize and anything else to never hear that story again.
You would have let them make you King instead of President. Blah Blah Blah.
By Al N. at 01:27 08 Nov 2017
Trump's gonna have his face carved up here and wants us to pick which one goes.
Teddy's got those ridiculous glasses.
You can all suck on my big stick!
I think we all agree that Teddy's it. He had animals all over the White House!
By Al N. at 21:26 07 Feb 2018
Poor Teddy Bear. No one likes you. Go home.
Who's the new guy with the mustache?
Hey, I'm a Roosevelt. I'm important!
Teddy Bear. Why don't sit on a beddy? Teddy.
By Butch at 23:51 01 Apr 2020

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