Showing:
It's a wonderful life?
| George | Mary | Zuzu |
|---|---|---|
Now, gosh darn it, if I hear that one more time, I'm going on a killing spree! |
Now, George, don't upset the children. You know how it affected them last time. |
Every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings. |
| By Mark at 14:30 29 Nov 2010 | ||
Say, Mary, what do you want? Do you want a 52" 3D LED TV? I'll get you one, Mary |
I'll take it. |
Daddy, it was me who did the doo-doo in your best shoes. I'm sorry. |
| By Mark at 14:32 29 Nov 2010 | ||
*Nyrrrrrgh* |
George...you're...hurting me. |
Every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings. |
| By Mark at 14:33 29 Nov 2010 | ||
I got drunk. |
You had a nightmare |
Every time you got hit, an angel got his wings. |
| By Bureau at 20:26 29 Nov 2010 | ||
We're in a classic |
Sure, black & white |
I just farted |
| By Bureau at 20:27 29 Nov 2010 | ||
I'll never wish I had never been born again |
You would have changed everything |
We might be in color. |
| By Bureau at 20:28 29 Nov 2010 | ||
Tiny Tim, why are you here? |
He's in the wrong film. |
Bless us all. Do you bless people who fart? |
| By Bureau at 20:29 29 Nov 2010 | ||
I'm glad to be alive. |
Glad you survived George. |
Maybe you didn't. Say 'Brains!' daddy. |
| By Bureau at 20:30 29 Nov 2010 | ||
Wonder where that angel went? |
He was using the pump and then he flew away. |
You mean he flew off the handle? |
| By Bureau at 20:31 29 Nov 2010 | ||
Now everything is great until the next movie. |
Wonder who we will be? |
I have that shitty Shirley Temple stand-in role |
| By Bureau at 20:33 29 Nov 2010 | ||
We really need to give something back to the poor this Christmas season. |
Why? They've never given anything to us. |
Daddy, mommy, I don't really look like a 'munchkin' do I ? |
| By Lady Godiva at 02:44 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Oh look! It's snowing outside. How lovely. We'll have a white Christmas. |
Well hell's bells you better get the snow shovel ready because I'm not doing it |
Aw mom. You are so bloody lazy. Pardon my French. |
| By Lady Godiva at 02:48 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Now, who the hell keeps changing the audio track on this DVD? |
George, quiero tenerte aqu�, ahora mismo. |
Chaque fois qu'une cloche sonne, un ange se ses ailes. |
| By Mark at 09:42 30 Nov 2010 | ||
I have an itch in an awkward place. |
Oh my dear! Why don't you scratch it? |
He has his hands full dummy! |
| By Lady Godiva at 12:11 30 Nov 2010 | ||
I'm worried about our 6ft tall daughter |
Keep smiling and she might not hurt us |
One move and this dagger go's in your back |
| By churchmouse at 12:28 30 Nov 2010 | ||
So that's the infamous Heidi Montag. |
Yes it is. |
Mommy, I smell plastic. |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:04 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Well it looks like Naomi Campbell is moving in |
Dammit! There goes the friggin neighborhood |
Mommy, what does friggin mean? |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:06 30 Nov 2010 | ||
I guess we'll hear all about your mom being patted down. |
Behave honey. You know she's 102. |
Mommy, why is grandma smiling and touching her pee-pee? |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:11 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Ya see. I told you Bristol would not win. |
I still think that Bristol "The Pistol" Should have won. |
But mommy...she sucks big time! |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:13 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Damn, those Kardashian sisters have big butts |
Even bigger than Venus and Serena's |
But that bitch J-Lo has them all beat! |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:16 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Donald Trump's hair looks absolutely stupid! |
Abso-effen-lutely stupid! |
Abso-double effen-lutely stupid! |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:19 30 Nov 2010 | ||
That Ann Coulter is sure one skinny ass woman! |
The bitch looks like a straw with an Adam's apple! |
Mommy, you said bitch. |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:21 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Angelina Jolie's lips are bigger than Mick Jaggers |
And Steven Tyler's lips are bigger than Angelina Jolie's |
Mommy, what's a home-wrecking whore? |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:24 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Sarah Palin thinks the North Koreans are nice |
She really needs to lay off the Russian vodka |
Granny says the skank ho needs to stay in Alaska |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:28 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Rev. Al Sharpton is sure one messed up colored dude |
George, he's not colored he's black |
Mommy, my teacher said black is a color |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:30 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Did Oprah just kiss Gayle on the mouth? |
Yes, and Gayle touched Oprah's right knocker |
Bad mommy. You said knocker |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:32 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Wow! Chaz Bono is sure one ugly looking guy |
Did you forget what Chastity looked like. Bow Wow City. |
Daddy have you and Mommy ever changed your sex? |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:36 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Look, it's LeAnn Rimes |
Damn home wrecking, husband stealing slut |
Daddy, Mommy's one upset bitch huh? |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:40 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Is that Sandra Bullock kissing another girl? |
Yes George. You know she loves kissing females. |
Just like Daddy does when you go visit grandma Mommy |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:43 30 Nov 2010 | ||
I think they would swap it for Zuzu's shit Twinkle |
I say Darling, do you think they would swap that tinsel for little Zuzu? |
HELP HELP PHONE THE FUCKING CHILD PROTECTION AGENCY...... |
| By birbee at 21:43 30 Nov 2010 | ||
A Grass of Sgarsgarilla glease |
A Gottle of Geer |
What would you like to drink my Dears? |
| By Erskin Quint at 21:44 30 Nov 2010 | ||
OK Zuzu, you're not getting any Christmas Presents this year. |
Oh, you are such a cad, George |
Daddy, could I possibly be let down? |
| By birbee at 21:45 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Mary, do you think that Lady Gaga is a hermaphrodite? |
Yes. There's just no way that crotch bulge is normal |
Hey peeps. What the hell is a hermaphrodite? |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:49 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Wow! Kirstie Alley is one big old gal |
Yes. I hear she weighs 409 pounds |
And how about if she put all of her clothes back on? |
| By Abel Rodriguez at 21:51 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Do you think I need more sperm in my hair, Mary?? Just the front bit maybe??? |
George, there's something about your hair. It's not quite right. |
Can I have a puppy? |
| By birbee at 21:52 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Come Now Mother, You Don't Want The Folks To See Your Bald Head. |
George, We've Only Got The Top of Your Father's Head In The Picture. |
Why Do I Have To Wear This Horsehair Wig? |
| By Erskin Quint at 22:41 30 Nov 2010 | ||
I tried But It Won't Let Go! |
For God's Sake, Can't You Leave The Monkey In The House For Once? |
Fuck Off You Pair Of Cunts. I Didn't Ask To Be Fucking Born. |
| By Erskin Quint at 22:47 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Please calm down, ladies. There will be another smoke break in five minutes. |
They always say, "Never work with animals or children." Don't they? DON'T THEY?? |
SCREW YOU, FRANK! THIS IS MY GOOD SIDE!! -- I swear I'm gonna get a new agent... |
| By SpaceElevator at 23:26 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Right about now, little girl, there is an idiot being born into this world. |
You mean George W. Bush, George? |
When I'm a big girl I'll invent a time machine to come back and "terminate" him. |
| By SpaceElevator at 23:51 30 Nov 2010 | ||
Gosh! Isn't this just smashing. My dream. A lady on each arm. |
Well, I don't wish to be cruel - but Zuzu is not a lady. |
I will be ONE day though and you'll be DEAD. I'll be having lots of fun. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:06 01 Dec 2010 | ||
One of these things is not like the other: ...I've got a one-eyed trouser snake. |
...I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. |
...I've never been to the State Fair. |
| By SpaceElevator at 03:26 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Should auld acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? Should auld ac... |
...quaintance be forgot and days of auld lang syne? For auld lang syne, my de... |
...blah blee bloo watermelon cantaloupe cantaloupe watermelon bloo blee blah... |
| By SpaceElevator at 11:47 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Oh look Darling, we've gone all black and white |
Ha Ha Ha, you are such a card |
Jesus! To think that someone actually writes this crap |
| By churchmouse at 15:05 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Do you remember the night that Zuzu was conceived? |
Remember it! I've still got the soiled bedsheets. |
Too much information. Remember there's a kid in the room. |
| By churchmouse at 15:08 01 Dec 2010 | ||
You look beautiful. How about we get friendly tonight |
How about you go and fuck yourself |
You tell him Mom |
| By churchmouse at 15:15 01 Dec 2010 | ||
I'm gasping for a pint! |
If I catch you chatting up that barmaid tart again, I'll have your knackers! |
Mummy said a bad word! |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 17:21 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Does Rover have to lick himself like that? |
You try stopping him. |
Can you do that daddy? |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 17:25 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Has Uncle Billy been drinking? |
Oh, I know - one sherry and he's three sheets to the wind! |
Why is Uncle Billy trying to undress that lady? Is he a doctor? |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 17:30 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Terrific rack, Donna! |
Ooh, Jimmy - you're wicked! |
Why was the director feeling your chests this morning, actor mommy? |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 17:38 01 Dec 2010 | ||
"I do?" |
Do you know, George that you look like Jonathan Ross?" |
"... well I sound like him!" |
| By IN SEINE at 18:47 01 Dec 2010 | ||
"I thought that was the season of goodwill and love to all?" |
"Watch where you're putting that hand, George" |
"I bet he's feeling a right TIT! |
| By IN SEINE at 18:56 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Shouldn't you be in the kitchen? |
Shouldn't you be unemployed? |
Shouldn't you both shut the fuck up and feed me? |
| By masterchev at 19:22 01 Dec 2010 | ||
I don't think we'r in Kansas anymore. |
That's the Wizard of Oz |
Silly Daddy. |
| By Bureau at 22:29 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Call me Ishmael! |
Moby Dick! |
You said a bad word! |
| By Bureau at 22:30 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Maybe I shouldn't have saved my brother. |
Just because of our affair? |
That'sa nota fair! |
| By Bureau at 22:31 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Me Tarzen, you John. |
Jane, Tarzan, Jane! |
Wooho oho cheeeech!! |
| By Bureau at 22:32 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Leslie Nielson's dead too. |
That Dingaling? |
He just got his wings...for Airplane. |
| By Bureau at 22:34 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Would it be wrong to cripple it sweet heart? |
Yes darling, look |
Daddy look at the kitten |
| By Mr Spinks at 22:56 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Dearest Mary, can you scratch my balls coz my hands are full.? |
No problem my dear. Where are they? |
He doesn't have any. I checked. |
| By Lady Godiva at 23:58 01 Dec 2010 | ||
Christ Zuzu - you are extremely heavy. I may have to put you down. |
Now then George. No 'put downs' allowed. |
It might be coz I just pooped my pants. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:00 02 Dec 2010 | ||
Sorry Mary I was just at the convent down the street, donating to the sperm bank |
George your hand is cold...my nipples are standing up. |
You mean Sperm whale don't you daddy? |
| By Jean Le Fete at 01:54 02 Dec 2010 | ||
Say... Santa looks familiar. Who is it? |
That's Peter File isn't it? He's usually the Santa at this party... |
Not this year. Failed his CRB after showing me his bulging sack last Christmas. |
| By pinxit at 09:06 02 Dec 2010 | ||
Pompey won again, Mary. I'm so happy. |
Yes George. Everything's going to be all right now. |
What's a Pompey, daddy? |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 09:09 02 Dec 2010 | ||
Wowzers, sacked from BBC1 |
It's your own fault for getting surgery to look like Jonathon Ross |
As long as you don't start acting like him! |
| By IainB at 10:08 02 Dec 2010 | ||
I have lived this year twice now |
So you know the results of every horse race? |
Of course he doesn't, he's a moron, and we're poor. |
| By IainB at 10:14 02 Dec 2010 | ||
Look, here comes the ice cream truck. |
I'm getting a brain freeze just thinking about ice cream. |
If I turn my head the other way, does my nose look just as big? |
| By Charpa93 at 10:47 02 Dec 2010 | ||
Table for three? |
Oh honey, we're at IHOP we can seat ourselves. |
I just ate the gingerbread man's butt. |
| By Charpa93 at 10:51 02 Dec 2010 | ||
I'm from the planet Zoloft and this is my wife Xanax |
Let go of me George, or I swear I'll call the cops. |
Don't mind my daddy, he's coo-coo nuts. |
| By Charpa93 at 10:53 02 Dec 2010 | ||
We walked here all the way from Kokomo. |
And boy are our legs tired. |
Let me down now daddy, I have a cramp in my butt. |
| By Charpa93 at 10:55 02 Dec 2010 | ||
"Just a minute -- I want to watch this documentary on jungle warfare!" |
"Darling, we need to go to the shops before they close!" |
"I'm a celebrity, get me out of here!" |
| By IN SEINE at 11:24 02 Dec 2010 | ||
Boy, I sure hope that WikiLeaks doesn't find out about my third testicle. |
Or about my sex change operation. |
Or about the fact that you two conceived me out of wedlock. |
| By SpaceElevator at 16:59 02 Dec 2010 | ||
"I think they have named them after her...Zuzuvelas I think!" |
"Shall we buy our darling daughter one of those fancy trumpets for Christmas?" |
"They call them VUVUZELAS you idiot!" |
| By IN SEINE at 19:06 02 Dec 2010 | ||
Darling, the World Cup will be in Russia this year. Do you understand that word? |
Yes dear. Football is an overrated sport. At least they lost with dignity. |
Pah! Two votes! Suck on that bitches. |
| By masterchev at 22:24 02 Dec 2010 | ||
Isn't she a beauty Mary? |
Yeah. Amazing what Sky Plus can give you these days. I'll never miss XFactor! |
I feel like a dirty 1920s stereotype cartoon. |
| By masterchev at 22:25 02 Dec 2010 | ||
Who let the colored fellow in? |
I wish I could let this fart out. |
What drug should I become addicted to when I grow up? |
| By Guy Bellefonte at 01:04 03 Dec 2010 | ||
2. It's mommy's Christmas present dear, from old Mr Gower. |
3. I wish I had a million dollars... Hot dog! |
1. Daddy, why is that man taking all of his clothes off? |
| By Mark at 08:31 03 Dec 2010 | ||
Well, looks like there's an angel needing wings. |
I'll get my box of maxi-pads and help her out. |
Isn't it about time we had that little talk mommy? |
| By Charpa93 at 14:47 03 Dec 2010 | ||
Who just farted because it was definitely not me. |
Oh George...you know I would NEVER do such a thing. |
Yeah! Right. Blame it on the dog again. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:17 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Hey! Do you think the angels can CHOOSE their wings |
You mean like barbecue, honey garlic or suicide |
Stoopid.This movie was made years before people started to eat chicken wings. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:29 04 Dec 2010 | ||
I got my life back, but kids and marriage have taken my soul. |
I can barely contain my disgust, my skin crawls when you touch me. |
Oh goody! Divorce presents! |
| By mickrikko at 14:37 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Oh, to hell with it, I'm off to bermuda with the building and loan money. |
Good idea, let's leave this god-awful miserable hick town and stupid assed kids. |
What's a building? |
| By Mark at 14:50 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Say, brainless, how about I beat your head in with a coconut? |
Geroge? What are you crazy?! |
I think daddy's having another acid flashback momma. |
| By Mark at 14:51 04 Dec 2010 | ||
I wish I had a million dollars. |
Hot dog! |
Will you guys shut the hell up with that already?! |
| By Mark at 14:53 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Hee-haw!!! |
Hee-haw!!! |
You're a pair of freaking morons! |
| By Mark at 14:53 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Buffalo Girls won't you come out tonight, come out tonight. Buffalo Girls... |
SHUT THE HELL UP GEORGE! |
SHUT THE HELL UP DADDY! |
| By Mark at 14:55 04 Dec 2010 | ||
I'm the king of the world!!! |
Yeah, you'd give Leonardo DiCaprio a run for his money any day dear. |
Shame we're not on a boat, ya frickin' moron. |
| By Mark at 14:56 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Zuzu's petals, yargh, Zuzu's petals, nrggh petals...Zuzu...Zuzu petals |
Oh God, what's wrong George? Snap out of it. You've been like this since act 2. |
I think you braindeaded daddy when you whacked him with the frying pan momma. |
| By Mark at 14:58 04 Dec 2010 | ||
I feel so good, I could spit in Potter's eye. |
George, I'm totally wasted right now. I should've drunk that tequilla. |
Spit? I'm gonna go poop in it. |
| By Mark at 15:00 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Whrer's my hat? |
You never said that. |
Ohhh Daddy! |
| By Bureau at 15:07 04 Dec 2010 | ||
It was your turn last time, remember? |
OK! OK! Let's go to bed. |
At 4 in the afternoon? |
| By Bureau at 15:08 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Hey "uncredited townsmen" I'm George motherf'ing Bailey, y'all. Don't forget it. |
He's George motherf'ing Bailey, y'all. |
Yeah, Jackwads! |
| By SpaceElevator at 17:28 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Let's bet on who is coming through the Pearly Gates next... |
I'm thinking one of the members of ZZ Top... |
...but I'm not dead yet. |
| By SpaceElevator at 17:31 04 Dec 2010 | ||
What a wonderful time of the year! |
Please dear, you cannot sing. |
He can't even whistle. |
| By Bureau at 20:14 04 Dec 2010 | ||
I saw an angel I tell you. |
Sure you did. |
Daddy's drunk. |
| By Bureau at 20:16 04 Dec 2010 | ||
It's a wonderful life. |
It WAS. We're all dead now except maybe the kid. |
I'll have to look myself up on wikipedia. |
| By Bureau at 20:17 04 Dec 2010 | ||
What was that buzzer? |
I don't know. |
I think somebody just got their horns & tail. |
| By Bureau at 20:18 04 Dec 2010 | ||
What a loving family, I can't believe I almost threw it all away. |
I wish he jumped off that bridge so I could get my hands on that life insurance |
Why do I look just like the milk man? |
| By Guy Bellefonte at 22:48 04 Dec 2010 | ||
That old Buzzard turned out to be an angel! |
And you turned out to be a nut job. |
That old fart an angel? Come on, daddy! |
| By Bureau at 23:40 04 Dec 2010 | ||
He was an angel! |
And I'm a leprechaun! |
I'm Tinkerbell. hee hee |
| By Bureau at 23:41 04 Dec 2010 | ||
No, I had this weird dream! |
Spiced your eggnog at work, probably! |
Probably Pual Masson Rose! |
| By Bureau at 23:43 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Pual what? |
She spoke it misspelled. |
I meant Paul Masson. Farthead can't type. |
| By Bureau at 23:44 04 Dec 2010 | ||
Hey, I just heard that Birbee is Featured Writer |
What? When?Where?When? Why?Who? |
You just did the 5 W's mommy but YOU did 6. Clever you! |
| By Lady Godiva at 13:58 05 Dec 2010 | ||
Tee hee hee... beer... the angel said so! |
Zuzu, this is what happens when your father gets drunk. |
Great quotation! I'm posting that on Facebook! |
| By thebalancer at 20:07 05 Dec 2010 | ||
I can't wait to get home and have a scotch. |
This bozo squeezes any harder and I'm kneeing him in the crotch. |
These bogus actor parents are so narcissistic. |
| By C. Cranium at 20:52 05 Dec 2010 | ||
What do you think, Mary? Reckon we can do it? |
In your dreams, Georgie. |
Just get me my raincoat in case you vomit. |
| By Bugatti Dunes Ex at 02:13 07 Dec 2010 | ||
1.OO........................ 4.AH-AH................. 7.WALLA-WALLA.... |
2.EEE........................ 5.TING................... 8.BING............... |
3.OO........................ 6.TANG.................. 9.BANG............... |
| By SpaceElevator at 22:48 08 Dec 2010 | ||
I'm pretty bored stiff now. |
Ooh! Yes, I can FEEL it George. |
What do you mean Mary? |
| By Lady Godiva at 23:37 08 Dec 2010 | ||
Does God exist Mary? |
No you idiot. He was made up by people who are scared of death. |
But we are all dead now - and it's just like before we were born. |
| By Lady Godiva at 23:39 08 Dec 2010 | ||
She is handsome, she is pretty... Please won't you tell me, who is she? |
He pulls my hair and he stole my comb, but that's alright til I go home... |
Tell my ma when I go home, the boys won't leave the girls alone... |
| By SpaceElevator at 02:42 09 Dec 2010 | ||
That was a long wait behind Bush & the Pope -- I gotta piss like a racehorse! |
George, behave. Here...you can piss in my new purse. I'll return it next week. |
Are we stuck here til Christmas?! But I wanna open my presents from Santy Claus! |
| By SpaceElevator at 04:26 09 Dec 2010 | ||
That angel told me that Ronnie Reagan's gonna be president one day. |
Angels and ministers of grace defend us! |
I mean! What the flip kind of a name is Zuzu? |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 15:44 09 Dec 2010 | ||
If that taxi driver so much as looks at you again I'll give him such a twatting! |
Oh, George! He's harmless. |
Why were you wrestling with him in the back of his car yesterday, mommy? |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 15:49 09 Dec 2010 | ||
Mary, that's not really MY arm around you. My arm isn't that long |
I know George. I also KNOW where your right hand is RIGHT now George |
Mary, you should be worrying MORE about where George's LEFT hand is ! |
| By Lady Godiva at 02:55 10 Dec 2010 | ||
Are you looking forward to taking over as Miss Ellie? |
Well, that Bobby's a dish! |
Larry Hagman says it'll be a cold day in hell before you get a second season! |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 16:16 10 Dec 2010 | ||
Sorry ladies - I just farted. |
Oh George dear! Don't be so crude. You should just have said 'I've fluffed' |
Yes, that's what I've been taught to say George. |
| By Lady Godiva at 23:47 10 Dec 2010 | ||
I think I have tinitus. |
Do you mean you are constitpated? You have that strained look on your face. |
No...he's just hearing the sound of thousands of angels getting their wings. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:33 11 Dec 2010 | ||
Why do I get the feeling we're in a caption bubble? |
Nah! We aren't... right? |
Well, someone explain the speech bubbles hovering around the place. |
| By Inhopeless at 17:47 11 Dec 2010 | ||
Beans, beans, the magic fruit. |
The more you eat the more you toot. |
The more you toot, the better you feel. That's why we have beans for every meal |
| By Lady Godiva at 20:19 11 Dec 2010 | ||
"Jingle bells..." |
"Batman smells..." |
"Robin's baskin' on an open fire... I'm just a mixed up kid!" |
| By IN SEINE at 20:25 11 Dec 2010 | ||
Can I stuff the turkey now, Mary? |
Of course you can George - just be gentle though - like you do it to me! |
You mean RAM in the old sage and BOTH onions 'til it makes your eyes water? |
| By IN SEINE at 20:58 11 Dec 2010 | ||
Mary, don't you just hate it when Spoof writers have control over what we say? |
Not really George. They speak as much bullshiit as WE do. Dontcha know? |
Oh! Mary, please don't speak so! |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:56 12 Dec 2010 | ||
Oh my Mary! Did you know that Nick Hobbs had broken his finger? |
Who is Nick Hobbs my dear? |
Mary...he is just the biggest fan of Spoof Writer, Lady Godiva. |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:58 12 Dec 2010 | ||
Do you think Lady Godiva, Spoof writer....really looks like her profile picture |
Don't be so stupid George. None of them look like their pictures. |
Right George....just look at some of their avatars. Gimmee a break. Sheesh! |
| By Lady Godiva at 05:01 12 Dec 2010 | ||
I'm very Proud of our daughter, Mary, she has become a great car maker! |
I wondered why she wouldn''t play with dolls and girly things |
Yep... made a name for myself......... IZUZU |
| By IN SEINE at 11:29 12 Dec 2010 | ||
Oh god, it's a bloody Jehovah's Witness. Just smile and it might go away... |
I'm not smiling at it! It might sense weakness. Sigh, okay, just a small one... |
It's not working, Daddy! Run! |
| By mattymc13 at 21:48 12 Dec 2010 | ||
Glad to see you're wearing that doily dress I made for you last Christmas, Mary. |
I wonder what you've made for me this year, George. |
You're only as good as your last screw-up, Meathead. |
| By SpaceElevator at 07:14 13 Dec 2010 | ||
Kids say the darnedest things, don't they Mary? |
I'm pleading the fifth amendment on this one, George. |
Do as I say, folks. Or the stooge here says "Howdy!" to my Vulcan death grip. |
| By SpaceElevator at 07:30 13 Dec 2010 | ||
2. Thats because he comes from Russia, Zuzu |
3. Yep...RUDOLPH THE RED KNOWS RAINDEAR!! |
1. Daddy, why's that weatherman on the telly called 'Rudolph the Red'? |
| By IN SEINE at 12:41 13 Dec 2010 | ||
Isn't it great that we are all frozen in time like this |
Yes George, not everyone has the ability to be so |
Bu' it's gettin' ded friggin' borin'. A want t'do summit dff'rent ....innni' ? |
| By Lady Godiva at 02:58 14 Dec 2010 | ||
I wish we were in colour because I just love this purple scarf. |
It is very nice. Where did you get it. |
I know! One of the 'sane' Susan Boyle fans knit it for him. They ALL wear purp |
| By Lady Godiva at 02:59 14 Dec 2010 | ||
I just think those Spoof Writers are hilarious. Don't you? |
No! Personally I think they are very crude and write many distasteful articles. |
That's the whole point...or they'd be on a Susan Boyle fansite 'playing nice'. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:02 14 Dec 2010 | ||
Have you met Mark Lowton Mary? I hear he's a 'hoot'. |
Yes George. He seemed to be a very nice young man. |
Ha! He must have been on his BEST behaviour the day you met him. He's a pig. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:08 14 Dec 2010 | ||
I just went over to The Spoof and read Lady G.'s stories. She is amazing. |
I saw her profile 'image' George. Calm down. She looks NOTHING like that image |
Oh Mary! Don't dash the dreams of all those old fellas who write for The Spoof. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:11 14 Dec 2010 | ||
Could I borrow some money and take Zuzu to the race track, Pet? |
Oh no, George. You're having one of those Andy Capp "episodes" again. |
But I want to go to the race track! |
| By SpaceElevator at 22:17 14 Dec 2010 | ||
I could have smiled without help from prompts |
He does look funny. |
Fatty Arbuckle without trousers! Wow! |
| By Bureau at 19:45 15 Dec 2010 | ||
It's a wonderful life. |
But we're all dead. |
I died at 90! |
| By Bureau at 19:46 15 Dec 2010 | ||
2. Martha!..................... 4. Oh, Martha!............... 6.You complete me! |
1. George!.................. 3. Oh, George!.............. 5. My breath is gone! |
7. Get a room, you two. |
| By SpaceElevator at 20:11 15 Dec 2010 | ||
So - did they watch us or "Scrooge?" |
I don't give a monkey's - I'm knackered. 2 hours plus for crying out loud! |
God bless us, every one. |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 20:30 15 Dec 2010 | ||
2. Oh Donna - twarnt nuthin! You know you're the only gal for me. |
1. Shop Around The Corner, is it? Margaret bloody Sullavan? You bastard! |
3. Is daddy sleeping on the couch again mommy? |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 20:35 15 Dec 2010 | ||
Oh, Donna - you make me stand up, you make me stand up Donna... |
Oh, George. 10CC - our first gig... you remembered. |
Tcha! Mom! Dad! It's so embarrassing! You're so stuck in the bloody 70's. |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 20:40 15 Dec 2010 | ||
We all live in a Yellow Submarine,..... |
A Yellow Submarine, a Yellow Submarine |
Hey, I just read that the Titanic was really designed as a submarine |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:14 16 Dec 2010 | ||
How long do you think we'll be stuck here? I have Christmas shopping to finish |
Stop whining. You should be happy that people remember you George. |
Yes George. They only remember me as Jedd Clampet's ma in That Hillbilly show. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:17 16 Dec 2010 | ||
Wow! I've just seen that photo of Lady Godiva the Spoof writer. Cor! |
Calm down George. She chose it from some images on the site. |
That's true George. She's probably nothing like that image. Drool on though. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:19 16 Dec 2010 | ||
Watch out. The Subo Fanatics are heading this way. |
Armed with red scarves and plenty of Blessings. |
You're ok George. You are wearing a red scarf though we're in black and white. |
| By Lady Godiva at 13:38 16 Dec 2010 | ||
Whoops! I'm not wearing any pants -- and I think I just shat myself... |
Don't be silly, George. |
Pretend-Daddy, why is poop brown? |
| By SpaceElevator at 14:16 16 Dec 2010 | ||
Mary, are you the virgin one? |
Of course George, pure as the driven snow. |
Do you mean the 'yellow' snow Mary! |
| By Lady Godiva at 17:25 16 Dec 2010 | ||
Somebody's moved the snowman's carrot again. |
They should be ashamed. |
Why down there? |
| By Bureau at 13:02 17 Dec 2010 | ||
I'm happy, even though I have pneumonia from running around in the snow. |
We should have filmed indoors. |
What aboout the car scenes? |
| By Bureau at 13:07 17 Dec 2010 | ||
That last "Ding" was mine. It's frozen to my leg. |
Let's get you thawed out. |
Am I going to have a baby brother? |
| By Bureau at 13:09 17 Dec 2010 | ||
Gary Cooper, Cary Grant, and Clark Gable walk into a bar... |
Did they need stitches? |
Good one! |
| By SpaceElevator at 11:25 18 Dec 2010 | ||
Santa Claus, Julian Assange, and Barack Obama walk into a bar... |
Very funny, George. |
Pretend Mommy&Daddy, stop!! I can't distinguish sarcasm and verbal irony yet... |
| By SpaceElevator at 11:36 18 Dec 2010 | ||
That's just how it happened honey |
An 'Angel' called Clarence? Are you a faggot? |
Daddy I guess some days it would be best if you'd never been born |
| By Lynton at 21:25 18 Dec 2010 | ||
They called off the footy! |
Never mind, George. There's one or two things you can do round here. |
Mend the bannister, daddy. |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 08:21 19 Dec 2010 | ||
The screen door slams, Mary's dress waves. |
Like a vision she dances across the floor as the radio plays... |
Oh, purleeeze - enough with the Springsteen already! |
| By Ellis Ian Fields at 08:32 19 Dec 2010 | ||
I've just noticed that the two parts of my shirt collar don't match. |
Mimicking part of your family jewels George. |
Do we have family jewels? Oh goody goody gumdrops. We're rich! |
| By Lady Godiva at 12:01 19 Dec 2010 | ||
I fancy good slice of tripe for dinner Mary. |
Well there's plenty of it around here George, just look for yourself. |
Is tripe that white rubbery stuff we slide on barefoot in Billy Tripemans' yard? |
| By Lady Godiva at 12:05 19 Dec 2010 | ||
I think I need to check myself into The Priory Clinic after this Caption comp. |
Are you sure George? I hear it's been taken over by those Subo Fanatics. |
Yes, pretend Daddy, you'll be worse when you come out than when you went in. |
| By Lady Godiva at 15:15 19 Dec 2010 | ||
I hear Mick Jagger is still alive Mary. |
Yes, I was shocked to find out. I thought he'd died years ago. |
Who's Mick Jagger. Does he write for that silly Spoof paper? |
| By Lady Godiva at 15:16 19 Dec 2010 | ||
Gee Mary, Larry King has hung up his suspenders. That's a shocker. |
Yes George, it's all that was holding him together actually. |
Who's Larry King? Is HE another of those Spoof Writers pretend Daddykins? |
| By Lady Godiva at 15:19 19 Dec 2010 | ||
Not many people writing captions lately Mary. |
I know George. I think the novelty is wearing off. |
Don't say that mommy, I like sitting up here smiling. |
| By Lady Godiva at 15:20 19 Dec 2010 | ||
I know I'm a bit behind with the news, but the Vatican has ok'd condom use. |
Oh, that's much too late for us George. Look at little Zuzu. |
Don't we live in a huge condom mommy? |
| By Lady Godiva at 15:45 19 Dec 2010 | ||
Is Mark Lowton still around? I hear he has others helping him edit now. |
Yes George, seems he is still too busy to change the Captions though. |
Oh mommy, I don't want to go....I don't waannt to gooo. Don't take me away Mark. |
| By Lady Godiva at 15:48 19 Dec 2010 | ||
There is so much to say, and so few characters. Eighty just does not seem to be |
enough...I finished your sentence for you George because our lines are written |
by the same person so it doesn't really matter if YOU can't finish your sentence |
| By Lady Godiva at 15:50 19 Dec 2010 | ||
Ya know. I kinda miss Bureau, that great Spoof Writer, don't you? |
Yes George, but he'll be back again someday. |
Just like Frosty the Snowman George. Don't get upset now. |
| By Lady Godiva at 16:33 19 Dec 2010 | ||
Have you noticed a lot of the Spoof Writers seem to be suffering physically. |
Yes, George, it's because the average age of a Spoof writer is 85 dear. |
Wow, that's pretty old Mary. Are they all bald with whiskers and no teeth? |
| By Lady Godiva at 16:36 19 Dec 2010 | ||
What's that ringing sound I hear Mary? |
That's Mark Lowton ringing for one of his minions to get him a beer. |
I thought you said it was an angel getting their wings. YOU LIED! |
| By Lady Godiva at 16:37 19 Dec 2010 | ||
OK you can have a new car for Christmas. Just let go of my testicles |
It's not me, but as you're offering............. |
Ah-Ha! The child with the four foot long arm strikes again! |
| By churchmouse at 21:50 19 Dec 2010 | ||
Oh my! I hear Susan Boyle fans are fighting again on their fansites. |
Yes. Sad really. Susan would be so upset. |
Never mind. There'll always be The Spoof to run to for safety. |
| By Lady Godiva at 23:57 19 Dec 2010 | ||
Am I dead? |
Not sure. |
Such was life. |
| By Lady Godiva at 23:57 19 Dec 2010 | ||
Is there truly 'life after death or do we just GO? |
I'm not sure George. Jesus was supposed to come back to let us know. |
Everytime Jesus comes back, they lock him up in a loony bin. He must be fed up. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:02 20 Dec 2010 | ||
Oh me! Oh my! This is feeling like War and Peace all over again...lengthwise . |
Yes I know what you mean George. Or the Ten Commandments movie. That was long. |
Lady G's dad took her to see it. He sat for over 4 hours with a boil on his bum |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:07 20 Dec 2010 | ||
Lady G's dad sat through the movie The Ten Commandments, with a boil on his bum |
I heard that he did. It's the truth too. Nice fella her dad was. |
Yup! Ain't that the truth. He brought her up with values. She misses him. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:09 20 Dec 2010 | ||
Mary, it's rather slow around here lately. Do you think people bored with us? |
Maybe with YOU George, but certainly not with ME. |
I'm getting a bit fed up now. Only Lady Godiva writing for us lately! |
| By Lady Godiva at 13:55 20 Dec 2010 | ||
I'll send a text to Mark to see if he's even bothering with us lately. |
Well, he IS busy with the new Approval Centre George. |
But - that's no excuse to leave us stranded here is it? I used to like Markie. |
| By Lady Godiva at 14:42 20 Dec 2010 | ||
Well Mary, best grin and bear it. Looks like we're stuck here for a bit longer. |
Oh George, I do so need to powder my nose. |
Well you can do that in front of us Mary. What's the problem? |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:39 20 Dec 2010 | ||
This piece of hair is annoying me more than a dangling participle. |
Don't worry George. Everyone is looking at me and admiring my beauty. |
Wow. Talk about an inflated ego. Inflate it more and you'll merely burst Mary. |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:41 20 Dec 2010 | ||
Damn, I forgot to put the Lottery numbers on Mary. Now I can't move. |
Damn you George. Damn you to hell. I bet our numbers come up this week. |
You mean, you are both going to DIE????? Nooooooooooooo! |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:42 20 Dec 2010 | ||
1. Knock, knock. 3. Irma. 5. Irma Fedup and Anna Wannagohome. |
2. Who's there? 4 Irma who? 6. That's pretty pathetic George. |
7. Well, we're stuck with him Mary, until a new photo and bubbles come up. |
| By Lady Godiva at 23:28 20 Dec 2010 | ||
Oh my dear Lord....I cannot believe what I am seeing Mary. |
What ARE you seeing George pray tell. Do not keep me in suspense my darling. |
He bloody well sees that we are still effing well HERE. Pardon the language. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:42 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Sheesh Mary, dog gone it...I feel like saying a very bad word at the moment. |
George, hold back....don't get stressed for we shall be gone from this site soon |
That''s what YOU think Mary...Mark has forgotten ALL aboout us. You'll see. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:44 21 Dec 2010 | ||
I have an urge to listen to Susan Boyle's new CD The Gift, Mary., |
I know George. Me too...but we cannot hear anything here. We can just talk. |
I have heard the CD 'TheGift' and I think ALL Spoof writers should buy it. :) |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:47 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Well Mary, seems Lady G. is the only one putting words in our mouths right now. |
Yes George...and she's pretty unimaginative...just clutching at straws right now |
Well you two, at least SHE is taking part and playing the game. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:49 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Mary, did YOU do Zuzu's hair today. |
Why yes George I did do Zuzu's hair. Why? |
Well Mary, he told me that my hairstylist was crap. He hates this style. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:52 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Jesus, Mary, mother of God. We're still hanging in here. |
Yes George. Why do I often begin sentences with 'Yes George'? |
Because you are such a boring 'broad' Mary. That's what I heard George say. |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:54 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Lady Godiva has "writer's block" at the moment Mary. |
How do you know this George my dearest? How could you possibly know such a thing |
Oh. Think about it Mary. Why the hell else would she be hanging around here? |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:57 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Where have all the writers gone? Long time passing. Where have all the writers |
gone..long time ago. Gone to stories everyone. Left us here to rot my love. |
When will they ever learn? When will they eeeveeeer learn? |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:00 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Try as I might Mary, I just cannot come up with something new to say. You? |
Buggered if I can think of new stuff George. I'm well 'spent'. |
Dat's not da way t'do it guys. Create...create....create...youse can do it. |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:02 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Shit..sorry about that...but it's a new day in England now yet not in Canada. |
I know what you are going to say George "AND WE ARE STILL HERE" |
I am going to contact the CAS - Children's Aid Society. I'M being exploited! |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:57 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Mary..Zuzu...I am going to take my own life. I'm not sure WHERE I am taking it |
Call us when you get to your new life George. Perhaps we can join you. |
Well hell's bells Mary, it can't be any worse than THIS crap Caption thingy. |
| By Lady Godiva at 05:02 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Mark, Mark, where are you our Sweet Saviour? |
We bow to you oh Great One who is known as Mark. Get us the hell outa here. |
Mary, I don't think Mark likes rude words. Perhaps you could rephrase that. |
| By Lady Godiva at 05:04 21 Dec 2010 | ||
Sweet Jesus! Here we stand and Christmas just around the corner. |
I know George. I wish Mark would hurry up and `free` us. I have shopping to do. |
Ooh! Mary...and you Baby Jesuseseses momma |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:28 22 Dec 2010 | ||
Ya wanna know what I think...I think Lady G. will win this one . |
Ssh George! She`s the only one keeping us alive here. Don`t scare her away. |
What do you mean. I hear she just loves all the attention. An APE told me so. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:31 22 Dec 2010 | ||
What's the current endurance record for a Caption Competition stunt, Mary? |
41 days I think, George. If I'm not mistaken, "W" and the Pope won a new truck. |
Has anyone Googled "Endurance Stunt Backer Settles Case over Suicide" recently? |
| By SpaceElevator at 00:34 22 Dec 2010 | ||
Mary, There`s a SKULL looking over my shoulder between us. |
George - it iISstrange thhings you notice when you have been here so long. |
Yes, I have just noticed how enormous my left ear actually is. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:34 22 Dec 2010 | ||
Mary, there is a SKULL behind me, between us, over my right shoulder. |
George, it IS amazing the details one notices when one has been here so long. |
Yes, I have just noticed how enormous my left ear actually is. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:37 22 Dec 2010 | ||
Gee Mary. All the needles have fallen off the Christmas Tree. |
What did you expect George. They haven`t invented fake trees yet. |
Oh Mary, I hope they never do. That`d be like having a fake Santa Claus. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:40 22 Dec 2010 | ||
Could we get some Visine, please...? |
I'm not sure which is worse: the sleep deprivation or the not showering part. |
I have some extra NoDoz if anyone needs it... |
| By SpaceElevator at 00:42 22 Dec 2010 | ||
Gosh darn it Mary. Just gosh darn it. I don`t know what else to say. |
I am quite speechless myself George dear. I`ll `gosh darn` it WITH you. |
Oh to hell....I`ll `gosh darn`it too but I prefer rogan gosh and aloo gobi. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:42 22 Dec 2010 | ||
The calendar shows we've only been up for 23 days??? -- How demoralizing. |
We're going to win that new truck, George. |
23 days is chump change, Pretend-Daddy. |
| By SpaceElevator at 00:48 22 Dec 2010 | ||
Jesus! How long do we have to stay here? I forget! |
Don't worry about it George. We're all dead anyway. I think. |
Pretend mommy and daddy, are we safe from Monkey Woods and his alter egos? |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:07 23 Dec 2010 | ||
Zuzu, what would you like for Christmas dear...besides a new name? |
Oh George dear! Don't ask her questions she is unable to answer. |
It's OK Maryu.. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:09 23 Dec 2010 | ||
Zuzu, what would you like for Christmas dear...besides a new name? |
Oh George dear! Don't ask her questions she is unable to answer. |
It's OK mummy dearest. George I WOULD like to change my name - to - Jesus. |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:11 23 Dec 2010 | ||
Another question Zuzu....who is your favourite Spoof Writer? |
Oh George dearest - that is not a FAIR question - putting Zuzu on the spot . |
No! Mary.it's OK really. Easy answer. LADY GODIVA because she seeks attention |
| By Lady Godiva at 00:14 23 Dec 2010 | ||
It's almost Christmas Mary. Did you take the turkey out? |
No dear! David Cameron wanted to stay in and watch television. |
What's he watching Mary? "Hairdos of the not so rich and famous"? |
| By Lady Godiva at 17:49 23 Dec 2010 | ||
I really gotta pee, lets get this over with. |
I should have done that Tarzan flick at Warner Brothers. |
This smile is starting to hurt. |
| By C. Crawdad at 19:25 23 Dec 2010 | ||
When's Mark coming to let us out of here? |
Oh Georg. I don't know. You know I don't pay attention to such details. |
I don't care. I'm having lots of fun. Look at my face. Am I bovvered? |
| By Lady Godiva at 14:15 24 Dec 2010 | ||
That snowman looks funny. |
It's leaning toward the Whitakers. |
Dog pissed on it. See how yellow that side is. |
| By Bureau at 16:48 24 Dec 2010 | ||
Yes zuzu I do believe they are |
Anything's better than what you put in mine last night George |
Daddy are those spoofer guys trying to put words in my mouth? |
| By Lynton at 00:26 25 Dec 2010 | ||
Merry Christmas, Mary! |
Oh, George... nobody reads this stuff anymore. |
Un-f*cking-believable. Four weeks of my short life down the drain and for what? |
| By SpaceElevator at 08:07 25 Dec 2010 | ||
There it is again. |
It looks like a live snowman. |
Look at the big feet! |
| By Bureau at 13:06 25 Dec 2010 | ||
Wonder why the director is waving his arms about? |
We ARE smiling. |
I think it's because the camera is to our left. |
| By Bureau at 13:07 25 Dec 2010 | ||
On the 1st day of Christmas, my TRUE love gave to me a partridge in a pear tree |
well I got you a tie and some slippers, George |
it's obvious she doesn't LOVE YOU, Daddy!!! |
| By IN SEINE at 10:00 26 Dec 2010 | ||
On the 2nd day of Christmas, my TRUE love gave to me 2 turtle doves |
COWABUNGA!!! |
Mummy they're SOO...1990s, they're no longer teenagers - and they're not birds |
| By IN SEINE at 10:15 26 Dec 2010 | ||
I was so cute in this movie. |
You were a ham. |
She called you a pig, daddy. |
| By Bureau at 18:52 26 Dec 2010 | ||
Mark bless us all, everyone. |
Maybe we won't turn out like the pope & president. |
Mark, I just pissed on Jimmy Stewart |
| By Bureau at 18:53 26 Dec 2010 | ||
I hope this caption competition ends soon |
Are you getting cramp too? |
No he can't wait to get his hands on Lady Godiva |
| By Lynton at 20:29 27 Dec 2010 | ||
They say 'publish or be damned' |
Do they really? |
Yes, so Mark is really going to hell this week |
| By Lynton at 14:37 28 Dec 2010 | ||
I just saw my whole life flash in front of me in 80 minutes. |
Me too. Guess we're all dead by now. |
Not me. I'm 93 & chasing the nursing home immigrant worker. |
| By Bureau at 14:49 28 Dec 2010 | ||
Well girls. It won't be long now. We'll soon be gone from the Spoof pages |
Yes George! I'm wondering who will replace us dear. |
Well, we're a h |
| By Lady Godiva at 13:35 29 Dec 2010 | ||
Well, it won't be long and we'll be gone from the pages of The Spoof. |
Yes George. I'm wondering who will replace us. |
We're a hard act to follow. I do hope it's not a Political Caption though. |
| By Lady Godiva at 13:37 29 Dec 2010 | ||
It's been fun hasn't it Mary, residing here and having people speak for us? |
Yes George. No lines to memorize...it's all been done for us. |
Speak for yourselves! Oh! You can't - can you? |
| By Lady Godiva at 13:39 29 Dec 2010 | ||
I see Lady Godiva trie to put the same caption twice |
Oh she probably jus hit the wrong button |
I think she was attention seeking again :-) |
| By Lynton at 14:15 29 Dec 2010 | ||
You'd think they'd be fed up by now |
Well you know how enthusiastic they are |
At writing the first crap that comes into their heads |
| By Lynton at 14:18 29 Dec 2010 | ||
Oh no its that gosh darned Rabbit again |
I can't see anything George |
What's that white powder around your nose daddy |
| By Lynton at 14:20 29 Dec 2010 | ||
Susan Boyle is beginning to look 'good' to me Mary. |
George, you HAVE been here too long. |
Who's Susan Boyle? |
| By Lady Godiva at 14:31 29 Dec 2010 | ||
Yeah,well your hair makes your head look like a pie. |
George did we not discuss the "fringe"? |
sod these two,im off to narnia. |
| By paddy stash at 18:16 29 Dec 2010 | ||
What do youmean your hair needs washing Mary? |
I haven't washed it for days now |
Can I have first choice of the nits please |
| By Lynton at 19:57 29 Dec 2010 | ||
Mary, chill the white wine. Looks as if we'll be spending New Year's Eve here. |
OK George. At least most of the Spoof Writers will be here. |
Poor things. Don't they have real lives mommy and daddy, like we do? |
| By Lady Godiva at 14:01 30 Dec 2010 | ||
Have you seen 'Miracle of 34th Street' Mary? |
No but I saw 'Nightmare on Elm Street' George. |
I saw Sesame Street. It was the letter R. |
| By Lady Godiva at 14:06 30 Dec 2010 | ||
I s this compettion still not finished |
I know Dear I need a pee too |
Daddy does your hand feel warm? |
| By Lynton at 16:31 30 Dec 2010 | ||
My name is James Stewart |
James Stewart what? |
Here mam borrow my hearing aid |
| By Lynton at 16:33 30 Dec 2010 | ||
I hear Elton John has had a baby |
Don't be so silly dear |
Saturday night's alright for fighting |
| By Lynton at 16:34 30 Dec 2010 | ||
Is that Mark coming tout from behind the curtain? |
I think he could be coming to changr the picture |
Why are his trousers around his ankles? |
| By Lynton at 16:38 30 Dec 2010 | ||
The police have issued an Amber Alert for Mark. |
Yes, and I've just seen his photograph on the side of the milk carton. |
I just gave the police information about his last known whereabouts. |
| By Lady Godiva at 17:04 30 Dec 2010 | ||
Not long to go now my beauties, not long to go. |
Are you talking to your balls again George? Waiting for them to shrivel up? |
But we can use the footpump and inflate them again. Don't worry George. |
| By Lady Godiva at 20:08 30 Dec 2010 | ||
I suppose we are going to have to wait until the New Year to get out of here. |
Seems that way George. Pass the vodka. It's gonna be a long coupla days. |
Pour me a glass too George..never mind, just pass the bottle. |
| By Lady Godiva at 21:23 30 Dec 2010 | ||
Less than 24 hours to go Mary...are you ready to leave the pages of The Spoof |
Oh George darling...I am MORE than ready. My suitcases are packed. |
But will I be EVER seen again in movies pretend mommy and daddy? |
| By Lady Godiva at 03:49 31 Dec 2010 | ||
I wonder where we will be in 2011 Mary. |
Dear George, I don't really give a damn as long as we are not HERE. |
I want to be in movies. How can I find out if I am? I know. Google me! |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:44 31 Dec 2010 | ||
I auditioned for The Importance of Being Earnest but didn't get the part. |
Which part did you try out for George? |
I heard that it was for the part of THE HAAAAANNNNDDBAAAG. |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:46 31 Dec 2010 | ||
I've just joined Weight Watchers Mary. |
Why George? You are in no way overweight. |
No Mary....he just has a healthy fetish for FAT WOMEN. |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:48 31 Dec 2010 | ||
Mary, did you know I'm the only gay in the village? |
I was a little suspicious George, when you ignored me, naked in bed. |
Crikey, I'm learning all new stuff about you two. I hope Mark leaves us here. |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:50 31 Dec 2010 | ||
Did you read that 'Adopt a Bollock(s)' story Mary? If not...you SHOULD |
Oh George darling, are you trying to tell me something? |
Duh! Yeah! He's trying to tell you that we are all speaking a load of bollocks |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:52 31 Dec 2010 | ||
I'm joining the 'Adopt a Bollocks' campaign Mary. |
Why would you do such a thing George? |
Because he wants to adopt bigger ones Mary, and call them his own. |
| By Lady Godiva at 04:54 31 Dec 2010 | ||
Counting down the hours till midnight now Mary, aren't you. |
No George, I hate New Years it takes to get used to writing it on cheques |
I can't count backwards yet George, only if I turn around. |
| By Lady Godiva at 13:52 31 Dec 2010 | ||
happy new ear mary |
you mean happy new year george |
no mommy he thinks you look like van Gogh |
| By Lynton at 18:56 31 Dec 2010 | ||
I'm still wondering who'll be replacing us ya know. |
Me too. I'm wondering if they'll pick dead people or live ones this time. |
It doesn't matter to me coz WE WILL NEVER KNOW! |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:46 31 Dec 2010 | ||
who's this gosh darned woman who keeps putting words in our mouths? |
No idea George |
She looks like she's going to strangle one of us with her red scarf |
| By Lynton at 20:13 31 Dec 2010 | ||
Gottle of geer Gottle of geer |
Your not a very good Ventriloquist |
And you can not spell, bitch |
| By armfeetandtoe at 21:54 31 Dec 2010 | ||
Not long now Mary. |
It never WAS George, only in your imagination. |
What are you grown-ups talking about? I bet it's rude as usual. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:11 31 Dec 2010 | ||
I just read that they use arseholes to make hotdogs. |
That's not nice George. They're called 'butchers' dear. |
If a hole is nothing, then is an arsehole nothing too? I'm confused. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:23 31 Dec 2010 | ||
Two hours or less and we should be outta here girls. |
Now George...don't be getting our hopes up. We could be here a while. |
Yes pretend Daddy, what if Mark forgets us altogether? What then Daddy? |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:25 31 Dec 2010 | ||
I can't wait for the fireworks. I'm so excited. |
Mary, how come my words are in YOUR mouth. |
Zuzu, that must be all the alcohol we've been consuming dear. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:33 31 Dec 2010 | ||
Jesus Christ, it's 2011 and we are still ******* here. What in hell is going on |
F****d if I know George, but I am right pissed off to still be here. |
Oh...Happy 2011 George and Mary....Long may we live at The Spoof. I love it. |
| By Lady Godiva at 01:19 01 Jan 2011 | ||
I'm going to call my agent. This is just not in my contract. |
Good luck George. Do you think agents give a damn about us? |
No they don't...as long as they are getting their fees. Pump to them. |
| By Lady Godiva at 01:21 01 Jan 2011 | ||
It'll be a cold day in hell before I return to the Caption Comp. of The Spoof. |
George, Mark won't even invite you. All the writers are sick of the three of us |
Oh no Mary...they just love ME. They just LOVE CHILD ACTORS. I KNOW THEY DO. |
| By Lady Godiva at 01:24 01 Jan 2011 | ||
I just don't believe it Mary and Zuzu. Why does our Master desert us ? |
That's a Master Debate George. Take it to the Spoof Writers' Guild. |
Masterbate? That's really rude pretend Mommy. Wash your mouth out with soap. |
| By Lady Godiva at 01:27 01 Jan 2011 | ||
I just don't believe it! We're STILL here. |
STILL being the operative word George. I'd 'leg it' if I could. |
That's funny Mary...none of us HAVE legs tee hee! |
| By Lady Godiva at 12:24 01 Jan 2011 | ||
I see Queen Mudder won thousands of points in the Spoofs latest competition |
Yes. All the others will be crying over their keyboards this morning |
Ooh! Isn't that dangerous Mary? Are you going to get me a Tesco's Easter Egg? |
| By Lady Godiva at 14:13 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Do you think if a writer stares at this page they'll see it actually change |
To the new caption you mean (having run out of characters). |
Hmm! Do you think they have such pathetic lives that any of them will DO THAT? |
| By Lady Godiva at 14:18 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Lady G. WAS going to stare at this page to be here when and if, it changes. |
I heard -but she's just found out Man. City play Blackpool and it's on telly. |
Well, with that choice I'd be hard pushed to choose one. |
| By Lady Godiva at 14:23 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Christ its 2011 and we're still here! |
Happy New Year Gorge - Happy new year Zuzu! |
Whaddyamean its just the same pile of shit with different flies |
| By Lynton at 14:47 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Someone get this little cow off my arm |
What do they say Zuzu? |
Never work with children or animals |
| By Lynton at 14:50 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Have we really been here since September? |
Thats what the list below says |
three months of sheer hell for everyone including us |
| By Lynton at 14:52 01 Jan 2011 | ||
"Apt, I omit conception!" |
"What does that mean dearest?" |
"It's obviously an anagram of Caption Competition!" |
| By Inchcock at 15:13 01 Jan 2011 | ||
? |
? |
? |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:14 01 Jan 2011 | ||
I'm glad WE don't have to go to the new Approval Centre. |
Christ! That'd add another 2 weeks to our stay here - at least! |
Don't go giving Mark ideas now you two. Those Spoof writers are busy enough. |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:16 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Why do people say "I'll RUN a bath" or "I'll DRAW the curtains"? |
Or even, "I'll CATCH a cab" or "I'll THROW you a party"? |
Or "My nose is RUNNING" or "I'll DROP you a line" or "I'll be buggered!" |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:24 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Well Lady G. lost her own competition re: what time the caption would change. |
Mark must have seen it and - knowing she was correct, changed his mind. |
There's no justice in this world. No honour amongst thieves.No,no,no,no,yes! |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:40 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Do writers earn points for doing this Mary, or just get them for views. |
Now there`s an interesting question George. |
No it ISN`T coz he doesn`t have a question mark after his words . |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:45 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Wouldn`t it be funny if Mark put up a new caption when someone was typing� |
It`d read like a load of rubbish though George. What`s that � for �. Oh I get it |
What the hell do you call this then, Mary� (That`s lady G`s question mark). |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:48 01 Jan 2011 | ||
What is Lynton doing on the forum |
Canvassing opinion I think |
You mean Poll dancing surely |
| By Lynton at 22:06 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Christ, we are still here. So much for 'praying'. I heard he'd answer prayes |
Oh George darling...you don't believe in all that god crap do you? |
I was told you DO get an answer from God but it may not be the answer you WANT. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:22 01 Jan 2011 | ||
God can't lose can he? You just HAVE to accept whatever he gives you. |
Yes George. It took you a hellova lot of time to figure that one out. Bollocks. |
I don't care as long as he leaves Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny alone. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:27 01 Jan 2011 | ||
I promise to haunt Mark if he doesn't change this caption very soon. |
I'm with you on that one George. Mark is definitely on MY list. |
I'll come along and rattle the chains. He deserves it. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:38 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Half past whatdoyoucallit and here we stand. Oh Canada! |
Whatsisname doesn't give a whatdoyoucallem about whatsourfaces. |
Well said you to. I think a thingummyjig will be coming our way shortly. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:40 01 Jan 2011 | ||
I smell cabbage cooking. Anyone else smell it? |
Yes George. Lady G. is bored and is cooking Cabbage au Gratin whilst she waits. |
Yup. They're having Beef Tenderloin. Looks like an arm cut off by Dexter. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:43 01 Jan 2011 | ||
I feel like a Nerd. |
You LOOK like a nerd. |
News update George. You ARE a nerd. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:44 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Do you remember when 1984 was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay in the future Mary. |
I do George. It seemed like Science Fiction and so much became true. |
Except that men didn't REALLY land on the moon. It was filmed in a studio.... |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:47 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Men did NOT really land on the moon ya know. That was a big hoax. |
Yes George...I was in the 'pretend' documentary as a reporter. |
I went to the moon once....on the end of Ralph Cramden's arm.... |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:49 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Shoot...writers keep coming back here just to check if the caption has changed. |
Well, that's good for us George. Isn't it dear? |
It's only good for writers who keep putting words in our mouths to get points |
| By Lady Godiva at 23:16 01 Jan 2011 | ||
Don't YOU go putting words into my mouth Zuzu. |
Don't worry George. Zuzu can't type or read. |
I can TOO read. Anyway, don't worry George..Lady G. is doing her best for you. |
| By Lady Godiva at 23:18 01 Jan 2011 | ||
"Can you spoofers Please have a go at this competition?" |
"Yes, as many as possible please!" |
"Then they might change it, and I can get this hand off my bum!" |
| By Inchcock at 03:21 02 Jan 2011 | ||
What's that sticking out from behind the curtain? |
I think it's the queen mudder's periscope |
When she goes swimming with the guys they say she likes a 'submarine sandwich' |
| By Lynton at 06:22 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Hi CJ |
You think I 'look like Marilyn Monroe?' |
No mom he said 'President Monroe' - isn't he a juan! |
| By Lynton at 06:27 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Where's skoob he should be here |
He's at home with the flu and a hot toddy |
Toddy's not here either |
| By Lynton at 06:29 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Mary someone just snatched my testicles |
Who could that have been ? |
Probably he same one who test tickled mommy's snatch |
| By Lynton at 06:33 02 Jan 2011 | ||
"Go dial Davy is good isn't she?" |
"Go dial Davy?" |
"Go dial Davy is a just one Lady Godiva anagram!" |
| By Inchcock at 09:44 02 Jan 2011 | ||
We're here until the twelfth day of Christmas....... that's January 6th!! |
Then what? |
We STRIKE!! We say NOTHING |
| By IN SEINE at 11:19 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Only 3 days to go until the Great Spoof Caption Writers Strike 2011 |
It's getting exciting isn't it George? |
I bet Lady Godiva will be the first to break it? she's a slag - I mean SCAB!!!! |
| By IN SEINE at 11:31 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Oh, look, Mary, Elton John and his husband have a new baby boy! |
Don't be ridiculous, George. How can two men make a baby? |
They put it in a U-Tube and watch it grow. Honestly, get with the 21st century. |
| By Amethyst Ryder at 12:42 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Isn't that Lady G. peeping round the door Mary. |
Yes George! She keeps checking in hoping to see a new Caption. |
Well, she's going to have a long wait. Mark has other fish to fry. |
| By Lady Godiva at 17:06 02 Jan 2011 | ||
You'd think Lady G. would have better things to do that keep checking in on us. |
George, lots of writers come here when they can't get inspiration to write. |
That's true George. It makes them feel that their day actually has a purpose. |
| By Lady Godiva at 17:09 02 Jan 2011 | ||
I see Lynton is Featured Writer today Mary. |
True George. Not before time. He is such a gentleman and a great writer too. |
Mary and Lynton sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G. YOU KNOW THE REST. |
| By Lady Godiva at 17:12 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Shoot, she's here again peering round the door. She's giving me the creeps. |
Oh..you mean Lady G. Well George, she's getting a little frustrated. |
She's not the only one. I've seen a few of those writers peeking round the door |
| By Lady Godiva at 17:41 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Hehehe.... |
What? |
There's a guy over there who doesn't know about the car bomb. |
| By Inhopeless at 17:41 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Roll on Jan. 6th and the Caption Writers Strike IF it goes ahead |
I wonder if Mark will 'get the message' George? |
Only time will tell. Only time will tell. |
| By Lady Godiva at 18:02 02 Jan 2011 | ||
The Aishwarya Rai Inflatable Doll has become biggest selling doll of all time. |
What made you come out with THAT George? |
Oh he's just proving that he DOES actually read the Spoofs on this site Mary. |
| By Lady Godiva at 18:13 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Kate Gosslin and Nadya Suleman are moving in together. |
Are they lesbians George! Is that why they're moving in together. |
No Mary. They're just two cows exploiting their poor children. |
| By Lady Godiva at 18:14 02 Jan 2011 | ||
I see Arnie Schwarzenegger is running for president Mary. Did YOU hear that? |
Oh George! Please stop believing EVERYTHING you read over at The Spoof. |
D'you mean it's NOT true Mary. Shoot. I'm a sucker for a good story. |
| By Lady Godiva at 18:16 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Darn, I just read in a REAL newspaper that Arnie Schcwarty is leaving politics |
I read that too George. More fodder for the Spoof Writers anyway. |
Ooh. I hope he makes more movies. I love Arnie. |
| By Lady Godiva at 18:46 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Do you think anyone will remember us when we die Mary. I, I, I mean REALLY? |
Yes George we surely will. We are HERE aren't we? |
Mark Lowton will be remembered for his very LONG caption competitions George. |
| By Lady Godiva at 21:52 02 Jan 2011 | ||
I heard that in the future, men will be having babies and marry each other. |
Anything is possible George. Remember Harvey...you invisible rabbit? |
Mary, don't be silly..that was just a movie, George means for REAL. I read it. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:08 02 Jan 2011 | ||
Mary, why don't writers go back and fix their typos on the Captions? |
Because it is too much of a hassle George and THEY know what each other means. |
Yes George. They're MOSTLY an understanding group of individuals. |
| By Lady Godiva at 22:10 02 Jan 2011 | ||
I see Paris. I see France. I see Mark Lowton's underpants. |
George dear..that is not really helping matters here you know. |
Tee hee! But it's funny George. Leastways I think it is. |
| By Lady Godiva at 23:30 02 Jan 2011 | ||
There really are too many people round here with time on their hands |
I know what you men |
Dumbasses they're clled wrist watches |
| By Lynton at 23:48 02 Jan 2011 | ||
"I just don't know what to say..." |
"Nor do I my darling!" |
"Not many Spoofers do either!" |
| By Inchcock at 08:24 03 Jan 2011 | ||
Here we go again! |
It's going to be a long day. |
Aren't they ALL? |
| By Lady Godiva at 11:48 03 Jan 2011 | ||
Only 2 days now! |
Lady Godivng will be the first! |
The FIRST LADY or the first STRIKEBREAKER??!! |
| By IN SEINE at 12:34 03 Jan 2011 | ||
No, I have faith in Lady Godiva but I know she doesn't like carrying placards. |
The strike willl give her time to write something worthwhile. |
Yes, she has been 'piddling about' the last few days. |
| By Lady Godiva at 13:35 03 Jan 2011 | ||
Some of our writers are very old Mary..and have many senior moments. |
Oh...you mean they may FORGET to go on strike George. |
Poor things. More to be pitied than scorned. We all get old - with luck. |
| By Lady Godiva at 13:36 03 Jan 2011 | ||
Time to take down the Christmas decorations Mary. |
Yes, it's unlucky to leave them up after Jan 6th. or so they say. |
Aren't we hope to be gone from here by then though? |
| By Lady Godiva at 19:31 03 Jan 2011 | ||
Zuzu they say imitation is he sincerest form of jealousy |
Zuzuz It rained birds in Arkansas -I know I read it on the spoof |
I read it too but I liked the first of the stories better |
| By Lynton at 22:24 03 Jan 2011 | ||
Yes Mary. I saw the stories. A little wierd I thought. |
It happens all of the time George. Don't fret. It'll be fine. |
George. It'll be OK honestly. Onward and upward as they say. |
| By Lady Godiva at 02:27 04 Jan 2011 | ||
When does the strike begin? I've forgotten already. |
Oh. You mean when NO-ONE puts words into our mouths George? |
Do you think it will ever happen George? I think it begins on January 6th. |
| By Lady Godiva at 02:29 04 Jan 2011 | ||
Does that woman never tire of putting words in our mouths? |
Who Lady G? |
Yep - if she's that naked one on the horse that is |
| By Lynton at 16:17 04 Jan 2011 | ||
I love you, Honey! |
I love you too, George. |
Guess you two need to go off camera. But I vote for a baby boy! |
| By Bureau at 19:22 04 Jan 2011 | ||
Thanks for staying loyal to me, Mary. |
Well, there was this one incident. |
Yeah Dad. She was kissing the Best Boy while you were flipping out. |
| By Bureau at 19:26 04 Jan 2011 | ||
And every time you hear a bell ring an angel gets his wings! |
HIS wings? |
Here in California, an Angel gets his first steroid shot. |
| By Bureau at 21:12 04 Jan 2011 | ||
No, when you hear a bell an Angel gets his wings! |
Are they ALL male? |
I think it's an Angel gets his Harley. |
| By Bureau at 21:16 04 Jan 2011 | ||
[Dear Lord: Please grant us the strength to make it through another day...] |
[Dear diary: Judging by angle of the Sun, I think we are past the Solstice...] |
[Day 36... Still no sign of Mark... Starting to ponder cannibalism...] |
| By SpaceElevator at 22:29 04 Jan 2011 | ||
"Happy Easter Darling..." |
"Easter?" |
"It'll save him telling you later..." |
| By Inchcock at 08:37 05 Jan 2011 | ||
Well, if all goes to plan, we won't be speaking to each other after today. |
Oh George, I AM going to miss you, and Zuzu too. |
Don't lie Mary, you told me you are sick of the sight of George. |
| By Lady Godiva at 13:35 05 Jan 2011 | ||
After today WE SAY NOTHING!! |
That's gonna be hard -I am a woman ya know? |
... and I'm going to turn deaf overnight.. |
| By IN SEINE at 15:14 05 Jan 2011 | ||
I'm going crazy, being stuck up here... it's just too long! |
Its Prfoessor Lowton's fault, George. |
He's using us for one of his psychological experiments...AGAIN!!! |
| By IN SEINE at 15:28 05 Jan 2011 | ||
"And now, the end is near..." |
"And so we face, the final curtain..." |
"And more, much more than this, we did it Mark's Way!" |
| By Inchcock at 16:27 05 Jan 2011 | ||
Being here is getting to be a bit like being tortured. |
I know! I don't know how long I can 'hold out'. I'll tell them ANYTHING |
Why don't we just all switch places? I'll be George, George be Mary etc. |
| By Lady Godiva at 16:28 05 Jan 2011 | ||
Oh, look, Mary, it's Ebenezer Blackadder... |
The kindest, loveliest man in all of England... |
What Would Baldrick Do? |
| By Amethyst Ryder at 17:22 05 Jan 2011 | ||
Any day now... |
Any day now... |
I shall be released... |
| By Amethyst Ryder at 17:28 05 Jan 2011 | ||
Mary, I can't move. |
Neither can I, George. How are we EVER going to get out of this? |
Don't worry, Mom. I have a cunning plan... |
| By Amethyst Ryder at 17:31 05 Jan 2011 | ||
DRINK... |
BE MARY |
EAT... |
| By IN SEINE at 19:17 05 Jan 2011 | ||
I see no evil... |
I speak no evil... (ESPECIALLY AFTER JANUARY 6th) |
WHAT? |
| By IN SEINE at 19:24 05 Jan 2011 | ||
Only 8 hours to now Mary my love. I wonder how many scabs there'll be tomorrow. |
Well, maybe not on 'purpose' George. Some writers may have been away nd not know |
Yes, they may not know what we are talking about. Right? |
| By Lady Godiva at 21:12 05 Jan 2011 | ||
Come on dears, smile for the camera. |
*smiles* |
You smug bastard. |
| By Griff at 15:05 06 Mar 2011 | ||
So what has he got that I haven't |
A massive trouser snake!! |
Yeh! dad. Yours is tiny compared to that! |
| By Dirk Scare-Monger at 13:21 25 Mar 2011 | ||
The Sex Pistols are on next |
Then the Damned |
Can I spit all over mummy, daddy? |
| By Steddyeddy at 09:50 29 Mar 2011 | ||
That man is so handsome |
The woman next to him is extremely beautiful |
I like the pretty frame of that mirror |
| By Tommy Twinkle at 23:08 16 Apr 2011 | ||
o o o o o o oo o o (wow that babe is hot) o o o o o o o o o o o o o o |
Back off Charlie! Debby is in the room! |
Daddy LIKES that lady MOM! |
| By Aspartame Boy at 05:34 08 May 2011 | ||
C'mon Mary. You know I need to practice before I perform for the Rotary Club. |
George, I can't watch. You know ventriliquist dummies weird me out. |
Who are you calling a dummy? I'll jump off his hand and kick your butt! |
| By Pariah at 02:33 13 May 2011 | ||
I have the best family a man could wish for |
I have all the love in the world |
I have the hair of Eva Braun |
| By Ho Lee Crap at 15:09 10 Jun 2011 | ||
How much did we pay for that tree? |
Sixty dollars, darling |
You got ripped-off, bitch! |
| By Ho Lee Crap at 15:10 10 Jun 2011 | ||
Yep Mary, that's about the jist of it |
So your uncle lost the money, you had a breakdown & were visited by an Angel? |
Daddy's drinking again isn't he Mummy? |
| By Marc A Cutler at 19:48 26 Aug 2011 | ||
They say that every time a bell rings... |
...an angels gets its wings. |
Except in this case. My Poptart is ready. |
| By JOJO at 03:37 10 Dec 2011 | ||
(Whispers) I Fucking Hate Christmas |
Miserable Old CUNT!! |
You two are both really really really OLD and stop calling mummy Christmas !!! |
| By MrNutz at 19:05 16 Aug 2012 | ||
Look, someone pulled up the Spoof website! |
Yay! now we can get a buttload of spyware! |
They tried to make an honest living--it didn't work.... |
| By Mario at 19:26 01 Oct 2012 | ||
1 |
1 |
1 |
| By yindsice at 19:23 19 Jan 2013 | ||
I see the way you look at him. But you're my wife and I can't let you go. |
But I love him because he's so rich and handsome. |
Yeah mom, you should divorse dad and Mary that guy. |
| By Dick Sheerer at 07:16 11 Jun 2015 | ||
So you won't sleep with me? I'll make sure the best you ever get is a TV show. |
At least I don't end up reading stupid, sappy poems on late-night TV. |
I had a shitty life but at least I'm still living! |
| By Al N. at 05:27 25 Dec 2016 | ||
Wow! Look at Trump and his wife fight! |
You would think they would at least wait until they were somewhere more private. |
Look, he's hitting her over the head with a chair! |
| By Al N. at 22:32 21 Jan 2017 | ||
You shouldn't have agreed. |
I would have demanded more but I needed the eight million dollars |
Not enough money. In that scene you can be seen in the crowd for a whole second. |
| By Tommy Twinkle at 13:31 02 Jul 2017 | ||
I still feel guilty bringing her into a world where... |
Where her grandchildren will have to live under Trump as President, I know. |
You say that twice a day Dad! |
| By Al N. at 01:29 12 Aug 2017 | ||
I can't believe this movie is considered one of the all-time greatest! |
I was begging my agent to get me out of it.I offered to do She-Wolf of London! |
I offered to do Dick Tracy Vs. Cueball! |
| By Al N. at 04:55 20 Nov 2017 | ||
Shall we just go home and watch Keeping up with the Kardashians? |
What's a Kardashian? |
It is when Ian is driving very fast. |
| By Ben Macnair at 14:06 06 Jan 2018 | ||
Wow! To think I was a Republican! |
Well, I campaigned for feminist rights! |
I wanted to protest child labor but my mother made me be home by 5. |
| By Al N. at 07:28 08 Dec 2018 | ||
Other caption competitions
- Goats (1,091 entries) - 19 December 2011
- Old Satire, Revisited (223 entries) - 4 November 2011
- I hate you all! (336 entries) - 31 August 2011
- "I am not a crook" - "Uh-huh?!" (892 entries) - 21 May 2011
- Llamas (or some other fluffy creature) (449 entries) - 6 April 2011
- Wise as Solomon? (389 entries) - 9 March 2011
- Cows (357 entries) - 17 February 2011
- Churchill, Roosevelt, Stalin (129 entries) - 24 January 2011
- Rushless, Talkmore (159 entries) - 6 January 2011
- It's a wonderful life? (383 entries) - 29 November 2010
- Pope, Bush & Bush (517 entries) - 18 September 2010
- Shoes with souls (703 entries) - 28 August 2010
- Meerkats (1,593 entries) - 30 July 2010
- Einstein (783 entries) - 19 July 2010
- Queen Elizabeth, Laura Bush, and the Medics (242 entries) - 13 July 2010
- Hitler & Mussolini - Classic! (431 entries) - 8 July 2010
