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Hitler & Mussolini - Classic!

 
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By author at 00:00 1 Jan 2000
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Hitler Mussolini
Hey, Mussi, hand down, das ist my bit.
Screw-a you German boy, I hail-a de ice cream truck!
By Mark at 10:02 08 Jul 2010
Achtung, ich vant a 99!
Hey, I ain't-a got-a no flakes!
By Mark at 10:02 08 Jul 2010
How do you do the rubbing the tummy and the patting of the head?
Is easier if you start with your other hand in-a de air.
By Mark at 10:05 08 Jul 2010
Hail us a cab Mussi.
Okiedokey!
By Mark at 10:07 08 Jul 2010
Hey Mussi, du hast ein Curtain-Pulllen on your pocket!
What-a-mistka-to-maka!
By Mark at 10:09 08 Jul 2010
fascist bastard!
I vote we take the ladies on a day trip to Paris
By Colonel Juan at 10:59 08 Jul 2010
I agree...let's do Poland!
Screw This Soccer Shit.....
By Morse at 11:03 08 Jul 2010
Better Wait...I'm gonna PUKE!
Waiter....more Scungilli!
By Morse at 11:08 08 Jul 2010
Ach, ficken! - mein colostomy bag gefuckt ist
Ok hands up who farted?
By Lynton at 11:10 08 Jul 2010
Can't...broke my thumb!
Cabbey! Two for the Coleseum!
By Morse at 11:11 08 Jul 2010
In my experience most Luftwaffe pilots are
Is that a Fokke
By Lynton at 11:12 08 Jul 2010
Say Hi To the little guy in leather..
Hi Skoob (cute little bastard, eh?)
By Morse at 11:12 08 Jul 2010
1 arm only...you're not French!
Fuck it...I give up!
By Morse at 11:14 08 Jul 2010
Hey Wop, That's my air minister!
Look at the size of that Blimp!
By Morse at 11:15 08 Jul 2010
All that military technology and we still haven't invented underarm deod
Ah that's better
By Lynton at 11:16 08 Jul 2010
Say goodbye to Neville....
Bye Neville....ARSEHOLE!
By Morse at 11:17 08 Jul 2010
Mein Gott! Put your arm down!
Ooops, Sorry, We're rationing soap and water!
By Morse at 11:23 08 Jul 2010
Are you trying to get sent to a camp?
Give me some skin bro
By IainB at 11:26 08 Jul 2010
careful what you wish for Idiot!
Luigi...2 for lunch..against the wall
By Morse at 11:27 08 Jul 2010
Who wants an audience with the Pope?
Does he do stand-up?
By queen mudder at 11:28 08 Jul 2010
Ya...think I strained my groin last night playing hide the Bratwurst!
Been gettin' much lately?
By Morse at 11:29 08 Jul 2010
Ah So, how are we going to deal with these Spoofers?
Bastardos! Worse than those Mafiosos , Join EU and they leave for UK!
By Morse at 11:34 08 Jul 2010
Nein...still plugged up from that Eggs Benedict this morning!
More Toasted Provalone after this Dog & Pony Show?
By Morse at 11:36 08 Jul 2010
If we stick together, a 1000 years,I love Holloween!
How long do you think we can get away with this shit?
By Morse at 11:41 08 Jul 2010
Trains running on time, but we've got to come up with something to fill em.
How's that Stimulus for Public Works Goin'?
By Morse at 11:42 08 Jul 2010
Ya..you'd be fast if someone wanted to hang you by your heels!
That Jesse Owens sure is fast!
By Morse at 11:48 08 Jul 2010
you need a new tailor...you're dressing left!
At least I've got 2 balls to adjust..how's that workin' out
By Morse at 11:51 08 Jul 2010
Why are you wearing a winter hat in summer?
Ah shove it, German boy.
By Mark at 13:16 08 Jul 2010
That's not your Mom. That's Himmler in a new dress he picked up in Paris.
Hi Mom!
By Bureau at 13:25 08 Jul 2010
Ixnay on the yuknay, till we slip into the U.S. with our routines. Where's Larry
Nyuk! Nyuk! Nyuk!
By Bureau at 13:29 08 Jul 2010
I ate too much at breakfast.
Come on, lift those arms fat boy!
By Mark at 13:31 08 Jul 2010
Shut up Mussi, I've got a hangover.
You put your right arm in, your right arm out...
By Mark at 13:31 08 Jul 2010
How come you have more medals than I do? What are they for?
One weeks long service, two weeks long service, three weeks long service...
By Mark at 13:33 08 Jul 2010
I'm going to invade Italy you know Mussi.
Who do you think you are kidding Mr Hitler?
By Mark at 13:37 08 Jul 2010
Ven is he going to take ze stupid photograph?
I don't know, I can't hold my arm like this much longer!
By Mark at 13:43 08 Jul 2010
Oh man, this sucks more than anything that has ever sucked before.
Yeah. Huhuhuh. Yeah.... I AM THE GREAT CORNHOLIO! I NEED TP FOR MY BUNGHOLE!
By Mark at 13:46 08 Jul 2010
Anyone bringing in Vuvuzelas gets ze final solution.
Halt, no musical insturments in this world cup match!
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:14 08 Jul 2010
Haven't you wops gone past two cans tied with strings?
I brought my telephones to that we can play with them later
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:15 08 Jul 2010
Suck up!
Teacher, teacher, I know the answer!
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:19 08 Jul 2010
That's my erection, you moron. I have a 3 foot penis.
How do you keep your arm up so long without getting tired?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:23 08 Jul 2010
That's why I have a staff car, you idiot.
Sometimes it's hard to get a cab at the airport in Roma
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:25 08 Jul 2010
Think he'll fuck up his country for as many years as we did ours?
Hey look, there's Barack. I'll get his attention.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:26 08 Jul 2010
Is that another Eva Braun joke?
I'm not in the mood for Italian, shall we eat German tonight?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:30 08 Jul 2010
You'll go down in history as Pope Benny, the fat.
...and I'll put a statue of myself up there, on top of St. Peter's Basilica.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:32 08 Jul 2010
"Never mind, Screwtape, I'll explain later."
"Master, why do we jerk their arms out like this?"
By Bureau at 14:32 08 Jul 2010
No, that's Snoopy in Met Life One.
Hey, look, it's the Goodyear blimp!
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:33 08 Jul 2010
Hold it up in the air, the wind will blow away the smell.
You didn't tell me I'd get shit on my hand when I stuck it up your ass!
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:34 08 Jul 2010
Ask her if she has any of that lasagna left over from last night.
Hey, hey ma, over here. Look! I'm with the Fuhrer!
By Charpa93 at 14:47 08 Jul 2010
tjat
Stop! In the name of love.
By Charpa93 at 14:49 08 Jul 2010
That's the last time I ask you to warm up the crowd for me.
Stop! In the name of love.
By Charpa93 at 14:50 08 Jul 2010
This is totally inappropriate.
Yeah, whatever, no-ones gonna click that flag link!
By Mark at 15:00 08 Jul 2010
Shut up you moron! I am not moving. The camera is pointing my way you dumkopf!
Look, is it a plane - is it a bird - is it a...
By Lady Godiva at 15:01 08 Jul 2010
I have sent out a search party to catch that freaking psychic octopus, Paul
My names not Paul dumkopf it is Mussolini
By Lady Godiva at 15:04 08 Jul 2010
Stop whining face-ache. It could be worse. We could be dead!
How much longer before we can smile again
By Lady Godiva at 15:05 08 Jul 2010
I just did a poo in mein pants!
What-a-mistaka-to-maka!
By Mark at 16:09 08 Jul 2010
Paul the Octopus, Man! Paul the Octopus. He's never wrong.
Are you sure that we will rule the world?
By Bureau at 16:10 08 Jul 2010
If so, you've already lost it, Fat Boy.
Will there be a Battle of the Bulge?
By Bureau at 16:17 08 Jul 2010
Your fly is zipped!
Oh My Gosh!
By Bureau at 16:32 08 Jul 2010
They seem to be everywhere.
There are those 'History Channel ' people again.
By Bureau at 16:37 08 Jul 2010
After this is over, you wanna go play tennis?
Sure.
By Mark at 16:55 08 Jul 2010
You got any signal yet?
Nope, damned iPhone 4!
By Mark at 16:57 08 Jul 2010
Hey, Mussi, wanna hold my Schmeisser?
Your WHAT?! Oh, I thought you said Schiesse!
By Mark at 16:59 08 Jul 2010
Gas lighters, sechs fur ein Mark!
Solo uno Lira para dee bungee-balls!
By Mark at 17:02 08 Jul 2010
Mein Gott, how I hate waiting for ze bendy bus to Camden
But Fuhrer, blackshirts & shirt lifters travel half price on Fridays!
By queen mudder at 17:02 08 Jul 2010
Der ist ein private behind me, schniffing mein arsch!
Don't worry boss, I'll have him sent up to your room in one hour.
By Mark at 17:11 08 Jul 2010
Stop dancing you pillock!
Sorry, I got taken with the rhythm of the oompa band.
By Mark at 17:16 08 Jul 2010
Musso, ja zink I look menacing in zees getup?
Mostly 'armless, Mein Commandant!
By queen mudder at 17:21 08 Jul 2010
Can you do anything about those vuvuzalas or whatever they are called.
I have put up my hand to silence the furor mein Furer
By Lady Godiva at 17:54 08 Jul 2010
Do I look fat in this moustache
You look fat in everything Mein Lardenarse
By Lady Godiva at 17:55 08 Jul 2010
Bratwurst Head!
Spaghetti Dick!
By Bureau at 18:44 08 Jul 2010
You would look rediculous!
Can I grow a litle toothbrush mustache, too?
By Bureau at 18:48 08 Jul 2010
They planted a bomb in my hat. It still rings a bit.
I hear another assassination was tried.
By Bureau at 18:51 08 Jul 2010
That's a store mannequin with no arms, you idiot!
I bid two thousand lira on the statue of Venus De Milo
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:00 08 Jul 2010
It's the Hindenburg, you moron. Superman is a comic book.
Look, up in the sky... it's a bird... it's a plane... it's
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:01 08 Jul 2010
Why did I have to ally myself with an idiot wop?
I put the Right Guard under my right arm... but about my left?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:03 08 Jul 2010
And I think you should be played by Susan Boyle.
I think Dustin Hoffman should play you in the movies.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:05 08 Jul 2010
I told you we should have ordered from Domino's.
I don't think the delivery guy sees us up here.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:06 08 Jul 2010
My second ball finally dropped.
And why are we celebrating this day?
By Bureau at 19:07 08 Jul 2010
To hell, most likely!
So where are you taking Eva Braun for your honeymoon?
By Bureau at 19:16 08 Jul 2010
Why do you think I founded the Hitler Youth?
I understand that the Catholic Priests really like little boys.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:21 08 Jul 2010
Yes, but it works good enough that Germany is my "fatherland."
Is it true that you've only got one testicle?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:24 08 Jul 2010
You remind me of Sergeant Shultz at Stalag 13.
You remind me of a yappy little terrier my wife had.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:37 08 Jul 2010
Yes, too bad we had to destroy his birth certificate.
Your son Barry is doing a good job ruining the American ecomony
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:39 08 Jul 2010
New! He modeled it after the plan I created... for Aushwitz.
Look's like Obama got his new healthcare plan passed.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:45 08 Jul 2010
Yes, they all got jobs working for ACORN.
Is it true that you have disbanded your S.S. Brownshirts?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:47 08 Jul 2010
Of course, Bill Mauldin will capture my brilliance perfectly.
Do you think the American who sketched you will do you justice?
By Bureau at 20:06 08 Jul 2010
Mir Liebe, Homosexuell Liebe, Nicht dear!
Taxi!....My place or yours dear?
By armfeetandtoe at 20:35 08 Jul 2010
You call pull mine after I've had some of Eva's sauerkraut.
Are you sure you don't want to pull my finger?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 20:57 08 Jul 2010
I do hope our trip to Argentina goes well.
Taxi!
By Abel Rodriguez at 21:01 08 Jul 2010
No, Eva just got a new teddy from Victoria's Secret.
Are you sure that you don't want to eat dinner at my house?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 21:01 08 Jul 2010
Benito, you are one first-rate charmer.
Raise your hand if you think Adolf is handsome.
By Abel Rodriguez at 21:08 08 Jul 2010
After the war, France and Italy will both be mine.
After the war, Italy wants France.
By Abel Rodriguez at 21:13 08 Jul 2010
Okay, and I get all the Burger Kings.
When we invade America, I want all of the Pizza Huts.
By Abel Rodriguez at 21:18 08 Jul 2010
No Benny, but remind me to shoot you after the parade.
Fuhrer, does Eva ever ask about me?
By Abel Rodriguez at 21:21 08 Jul 2010
Yes, Benito. But I have a much bigger pecker.
Adolf, I have many more medals than you do.
By Abel Rodriguez at 21:41 08 Jul 2010
Call me Ate Off!
Hitler, I would do anything for you, my Fuhrer!
By Bureau at 23:21 08 Jul 2010
I got tired of cutting the ends off my mustache.
Why don't you wear a sword like I do?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 23:28 08 Jul 2010
She wants to see Sex and the City 2 and check out Mr. Big;Can't be good.
I understand you are taking Eva to the movies tonight?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 23:31 08 Jul 2010
Is it true you Italians have the shortest lifespan and lowest IQ?
Is it true you Germans have the smallest penises?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 23:33 08 Jul 2010
Why did the people in the theatre call me Ollie?
I thought a Marx Brothers movie would involve Karl the Communist?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 23:35 08 Jul 2010
Shut up Benito! You're embarrassing me dude.
Bingo!
By Abel Rodriguez at 02:47 09 Jul 2010
Well how freaking original is that?
Heil Hitler!
By Lady Godiva at 02:51 09 Jul 2010
Hey Benny, go to hell punk.
Bartender, another round for me and my little Nazi friend.
By Abel Rodriguez at 02:52 09 Jul 2010
I told you Benny boy. Next Tuesday during siesta time.
Adolf, so tell me when do we invade Mexico?
By Abel Rodriguez at 02:55 09 Jul 2010
Yes, and is it true that your wife is a lesbian?
Adolf is it true that Eva never wears underwear?
By Abel Rodriguez at 02:56 09 Jul 2010
Hmm! I feel a song coming on.
I hope it's not Deutschland,Deutschland Uber Alles again. It's borrrrring|
By Lady Godiva at 02:57 09 Jul 2010
The same SOB who told you your hat looks good bitch!
Fuhrer who the hell told you your moustache looks good?
By Abel Rodriguez at 02:57 09 Jul 2010
What did you think of Dancing With The Stars this week?
Crap! No Goosestepping. How can they call THAT dancing?
By Lady Godiva at 02:58 09 Jul 2010
Did you remember to put the Lotto numbers on this week?
I'll hold up my right arm and say: Sorry I forgot.
By Lady Godiva at 03:00 09 Jul 2010
I can't believe you are such an idiot!
Why not? I'm on YOUR side aren't I.
By Lady Godiva at 03:01 09 Jul 2010
I'll take them both plus Italy!
I'll take Scotland, you can have Ireland.
By Abel Rodriguez at 03:01 09 Jul 2010
And some French ass wouldn't be bad either huh dude?
Damn it is hot! I could sure use a nice glass of wine.
By Abel Rodriguez at 03:02 09 Jul 2010
Tell me....did the Big Badf Wolf get any of the 3 little pigs in the end?
Hang on! There's my sister. I'll ask HER
By Lady Godiva at 03:02 09 Jul 2010
Well don't get funny 'cause I'll sure stab your pepperoni.
When I get back to my motel, it's undies for me.
By Abel Rodriguez at 03:06 09 Jul 2010
Mine is paid for. I'm a Nazi remember?
My uniform's rented, how about yours?
By Abel Rodriguez at 03:08 09 Jul 2010
You aren't supposed to salute the people, dumbass. You're supposed to salute me.
Oh yeah, I can never get that reicht for some reason.
By Charpa93 at 05:50 09 Jul 2010
The way we are positioned in this photo makes me look taller than you.
Not if I raise my hand like this,
By Charpa93 at 05:54 09 Jul 2010
Who's this "we" Kimosabe?
We're number one. We're number one.
By Charpa93 at 05:56 09 Jul 2010
You dumbkoff, winds of war aren't real meteorological events!
Yep, the winds of war seem to be coming out of the north today.
By Charpa93 at 06:01 09 Jul 2010
I see you've got the curtain tie-backs round your waist again
Shopping for curtains after this. Must match the colour Adolf.
By Lady Godiva at 11:19 09 Jul 2010
When will they change this photo Mussi? Are we to be here for long?
Don't know. Never played this game before Adolf
By Lady Godiva at 11:26 09 Jul 2010
We've ben here 24 hours. I need to pee really bad.
I have a large diaper on. Pardon the smell.
By Bureau at 12:44 09 Jul 2010
Now they match your head.
My feet are numb.
By Bureau at 12:57 09 Jul 2010
Funny you should bring that up!
They have a new Batman character in the U.S. Wonder if he hangs upside down?
By Bureau at 12:58 09 Jul 2010
Mark is showing everyone who is really the boss!
Why are we still here 24 hours later?
By Bureau at 13:29 09 Jul 2010
May as well calm down. It takes him half a day to read Bureau's stupid snippets!
Lowton! Hey Lowton! We're still here!
By Bureau at 14:00 09 Jul 2010
"That's not me. But I hear it too. Maybe we are in hell?"
"Why do you keep saying, Congratulations, you won?"
By Bureau at 14:05 09 Jul 2010
I've narrowed it to Grand Fenwick, Freedonia, and Guilder
Who are we going to invade this week?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:28 09 Jul 2010
Mark said we'll be here a week or two
Damn! I'll miss the World Cup Final. Schweinhund!
By Lady Godiva at 15:07 09 Jul 2010
You just said 'Schweinhund' I heard you. Don't do it again.
Sorry! Forgot I wasn't German for a minute there.
By Lady Godiva at 15:09 09 Jul 2010
How can you keep your arm up?
Hildegard the Sadist starched my shirt, underwear.
By Bureau at 15:10 09 Jul 2010
Did you see Eva last night?
Erm! No! Erm! Ah! Well! Who the hell spragged on me?
By Lady Godiva at 15:10 09 Jul 2010
Early days. Right now, they're Stalin! heehee
Why doesn't Russia do more to help?
By Bureau at 15:11 09 Jul 2010
Is that chap behind me smoking?
No, he's blowing a small white vuvuzela
By Lady Godiva at 15:12 09 Jul 2010
That hit my crotch. Good thing there is no ball on that side
Watch me hack this brick in half!
By Bureau at 15:13 09 Jul 2010
I understand that there are lots of vaginas on this website.
Since we're stuck here on The Spoof for a few weeks, want a tour?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 15:13 09 Jul 2010
Idiots! Might as well have been Pearly Gates!
Japan just blew up Pearl Harbor!
By Bureau at 15:13 09 Jul 2010
Why the hell are you evening LOOKING down there Mussi?
I've just noticed that big bulge in the front of your trousers
By Lady Godiva at 15:15 09 Jul 2010
"But..'Kilroy Was Here' tattooed on your ass while you sleep?"
"Don't let it upset you!
By Bureau at 15:15 09 Jul 2010
Yes, but Jesse Owens is still kicking our ass in these Olympics.
Look how high our Italian pole vaulter can jump?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 15:15 09 Jul 2010
...and just how did an idiot like you come into power?
Why call it a swastika? There's no glue on the back of it.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 15:16 09 Jul 2010
Why are you still holding your right arm in the air ?
Have you seen all the crap on the left side of my uniform. It helps me balance.
By Lady Godiva at 15:18 09 Jul 2010
I hear Wayne Rooney's been voted ugliest footballer on beautifulpeople.com
If you took of football you could easily win the title from him.
By Lady Godiva at 15:21 09 Jul 2010
I know what you meant you idiot!
I meant if you took UP football - back in the last caption thingy
By Lady Godiva at 15:23 09 Jul 2010
Read Thje Spoof lately Mussi?
What do you mean by Thje? Is that a new word or just a typo?
By Lady Godiva at 15:24 09 Jul 2010
Standing next to Hermann Goerring would make you look fat.
Does this uniform make me look fat?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 15:25 09 Jul 2010
Only if you are wearing it.
Does this uniform make me look fat?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 15:26 09 Jul 2010
To bad no one like that ever thought to join your military.
The Italian Stallone was a great fighter in the Rocky movies.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 15:28 09 Jul 2010
Well, I have shat my pants and got it over with. Now, who cares?
I think Mark stated he is not changing us for days.
By Bureau at 16:00 09 Jul 2010
How many times, Benito, Wear the sword on the OUTSIDE!
Whoops! Raised my hand too fast, castrated myself with the sword.
By Bureau at 16:02 09 Jul 2010
Let's just say, a bad Vuvuzela in Paris!
So what gave you the disease?
By Bureau at 16:07 09 Jul 2010
Let's just say if it's not here in 5 minutes I'm going to piss in your hat!
been waiting long for the bus?
By Morse at 17:18 09 Jul 2010
Sauerkraut! Ahhhhh! That's better. Better face the other way.
Why are you holding your stomach.
By Bureau at 17:20 09 Jul 2010
What'll you take for Amanda Knox?
How bout your goalie, a midfielder and that Red Headed Nude cheerleader Anna?
By Morse at 17:23 09 Jul 2010
Well, I can see it from the Wolf's Lair and I figure no more than 4 hours max!
What's your take on France?
By Morse at 17:25 09 Jul 2010
Shish. That is a state secret.
Pardon my arm. I went to sleep with Viagra pill in my hand.
By Bureau at 18:25 09 Jul 2010
Just caught a look of myself in that shop window. Mein Gott I'm handsome!
That's not a shop window...It's a poster of John Cleese
By Lady Godiva at 19:01 09 Jul 2010
What's your mother up to these days Mussi?
Oh! I'd say about fifteen stone, give or take a pound.
By Lady Godiva at 19:03 09 Jul 2010
Shit! Will I have to recall Romney for parades?
Tanks to the right! The Right!
By Bureau at 19:03 09 Jul 2010
I say, isn't that Mark Lowton with an octopus on his head?
Yes, I believe it is Adolf. I heard he is partial to seafood.
By Lady Godiva at 19:06 09 Jul 2010
I wish they'd got our lower legs in this photo.
Me too, I'm wearing my new designer boots.
By Lady Godiva at 19:08 09 Jul 2010
I haven't made my mind up yet. I'll wait and see what's on television tonight.
Are we going to keep on fighting today Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 19:13 09 Jul 2010
I've told you not to think Mussi. No good ever comes of it.
I've just been thinking Adolf.....
By Lady Godiva at 19:15 09 Jul 2010
You know the teacher nevers picks you......she can't see you down there.
I know the answer to this one. Pick me. Pick me.
By Lady Godiva at 19:16 09 Jul 2010
I'm not playing that stupid game here. You know there are only two 'bubbles'.
Knock! Knock!
By Lady Godiva at 19:18 09 Jul 2010
One. The microwave oven's been invented you clown.
How many Germans does it take to make a pan of popcorn?
By Lady Godiva at 19:20 09 Jul 2010
With Eggplant Parmesean?
What about 'Caesar Mussolini'?
By Bureau at 19:58 09 Jul 2010
You know it always cracks me up. Look at the lift on the right side of my mouth.
Mama Mia, thatsa spicy meatball-a! There I said it. Happy?
By Bureau at 20:04 09 Jul 2010
You have the piss, you mean!
I have the blood of a line of Caesars in my veins.
By Bureau at 20:21 09 Jul 2010
We have better. We have French, Belgium, Polish, German, etc. etc.
We have the grandest food in the world in Italy.
By Bureau at 20:24 09 Jul 2010
This electricians' tape under my nose is beginning to itch.
Well I DID tell you to use a black marker and just draw it on.
By Lady Godiva at 21:19 09 Jul 2010
Yes, and my full mustache may grow in by then.
Is Lowton really making me hold my hand up for two weeks?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 21:19 09 Jul 2010
And mine will be down to my chin. We should have a word in Mark Lowton's ear.
If I stand here much longer I'll have a moustache like you.
By Lady Godiva at 21:20 09 Jul 2010
This caption game's slowing down a bit don't you think?
That's because the writers are all down at the pub. It'll pick up later Adolf.
By Lady Godiva at 21:22 09 Jul 2010
Yes, the rump roast I had for lunch was cooked a little rare.
Is it true that you have a little bit of Jewish blood in you?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 21:23 09 Jul 2010
For the hundreth time, I was not eating that tampon!
Adolf, is it true that you have a little bit of Jewish blood in you?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 21:24 09 Jul 2010
Keep your germs to yourself, you dirty wop.
If everyone says Gesudheit when someone sneezes. What about you?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 21:27 09 Jul 2010
It depends which spy you are referring to Mussi mein freund.
Do you fancy playing I spy?
By Lady Godiva at 22:33 09 Jul 2010
D'you think I hadn't notice? You are smelling really ripe.
God! I need a shower really badly!
By Lady Godiva at 22:34 09 Jul 2010
Don't panic my little freund, Eva's taping it for us.
I'm going to miss Eastenders if we have to stay here much longer.
By Lady Godiva at 22:35 09 Jul 2010
Just let it rip Mussi. I always do. Bugger the jerks behind us.
Ooh! I feel a fart coming. What should I do Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 22:37 09 Jul 2010
What kind of a dumb arsed question is THAT Mussi. You are so bloody ignorant.
Do you believe in God Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 22:39 09 Jul 2010
Family, schmamily. You're going soft in the head Mussi.
I'm beginning to miss my family Adolf. I cry into my pillow every night.
By Lady Godiva at 22:41 09 Jul 2010
Whining AGAIN? Scheissen! Suck it up! Do you EVER stop?
Shit! I've got cramp in my arm. Ow! It bloody well hurts like freaking hell.
By Lady Godiva at 22:44 09 Jul 2010
Wait 'till I get my hands on Eva. I told the stupid woman to take care of that.
Look. A plane with a banner. It says 'Adolf hasn't paid his gas bill'.
By Lady Godiva at 22:52 09 Jul 2010
Sucking up again Mussi? I hope you like stir fried Octopus and warm beer.
Mark Lowton called me last night and invited me for dinner.
By Lady Godiva at 22:55 09 Jul 2010
Yeeees! I know you MEANT to ask if Wayne Rooney has smelly socks.
You know I asked you about Romney being the Desert Fox?
By Lady Godiva at 23:01 09 Jul 2010
Because the English have no bloody imagination. 'god' is 'good' minus an 'o'.
Why is 'evil'-'devil' minus the 'd' in the English language Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 23:13 09 Jul 2010
Well, I know some, like the swastsika, and....well...that's all I know about it.
Do you know sign language Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 23:16 09 Jul 2010
Of course I did you moron. Shit, I forgot to take back 'Cooking with Delia'.
Did you remember to take your library books back before you came here Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 23:18 09 Jul 2010
Oh hell's bells.....I knew I'd forgotten something.
Did you remember to cancel the papers and milk before you left Adolf.
By Lady Godiva at 23:19 09 Jul 2010
What are you implying Mussi? Mine's obviously 'in the mail'. So shut the F up.
Did you get your invite to the Queen of England's birthday party Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 23:24 09 Jul 2010
Because I'm the Ober Fuhrer!
Eva wants to know why you never let her be on top during sex?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 23:40 09 Jul 2010
In my army, the "ge-stop-poo."
What do you call men who can keep themselves from shitting?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 23:41 09 Jul 2010
No, but it did make my vasectomy only half as painful.
Has having only one testicle made your sex life more difficult?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 23:46 09 Jul 2010
Of course I did you moron, but he won't bend. At least not when I'm around.
Hey Adolf! Did you ask Mark to shorten our stay on this Caption Competition?
By Lady Godiva at 23:54 09 Jul 2010
I am the master race! We are never "colored."
Would you rather be black and white or colored in your pictures?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 23:58 09 Jul 2010
I like big butts and I cannot lie!
Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 23:59 09 Jul 2010
What'd be the freaking use Mussi? She's in Canada and they're ten months behind
Did you ask Lady G. for an update on Coronation Street Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 23:59 09 Jul 2010
No, I've smelled you shoot your farts around corners enough.
Are you going to see "The Last Airbender" this weekend?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 00:00 10 Jul 2010
Just take the bloody ferret out of your trousers you bleeding freak.
Ooh! Ouch! I can't stand the pain. I thought it'd be fun. Ow! Sod it! Crap!
By Lady Godiva at 00:04 10 Jul 2010
Yes, Mussi, it is a Nazi fact.
Adolf is it true that Eva's hooha smells like lilacs?
By Abel Rodriguez at 02:06 10 Jul 2010
And you will soon have my boot up your ass
You have a caterpiller under your nose.
By Bureau at 02:13 10 Jul 2010
"Peace in our time! Peace in our time!"
Halt! Come no closer, Chamberlain!
By Bureau at 02:16 10 Jul 2010
Because of the kraut making them fart like someone stepping on a goose!
Why call it a goose step?
By Bureau at 02:18 10 Jul 2010
She's a bloody insomniac. I thought you knew. Hang on...maybe it's 'maniac'.
I've just been looking at The Spoof and Lady G. is the only one online at the mo
By Lady Godiva at 04:57 10 Jul 2010
Not sure yet. I'm waiting for Lady G's article. She often posts their specials.
I'm off to Morrisons after this. Do you want anything picking up?
By Lady Godiva at 05:00 10 Jul 2010
It jarred my feet. What did you eat, anyway?
Whoa! Hey! That was a tail shaker!
By Bureau at 11:34 10 Jul 2010
I admit he is prettier than either of us.
What about Churchill?
By Bureau at 12:00 10 Jul 2010
That's why Larry never showed up!
Lowton is playing us for a couple of stooges.
By Bureau at 12:07 10 Jul 2010
I've forgtten the counter-sign. Groucho has shot an elephant in his pajamas?
The Hindenburg has crashed!
By Bureau at 12:22 10 Jul 2010
Shultz, in Stalag 17.
And who is planning this masterful Russian attack?
By Bureau at 13:07 10 Jul 2010
Stop wearing a man thong and go back to boxers, like me.
Every time I raise my arm like this, my shorts crawl up my crack.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 13:29 10 Jul 2010
I could have had a V-8.
Waiter! Can we get a couple of Italian beers over here!
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 13:31 10 Jul 2010
I should have killed you and signed a pact with Franco.
I'm still waiting for my roll-on anti perspirant to dry.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 13:33 10 Jul 2010
SIX & A HALF BUT WITH A HUGE HEAD!
SEVEN SOLID INCHES!
By Bureau at 14:14 10 Jul 2010
How freaking original. You never cease to amaze me Mussi.
Heil Hitler!
By Lady Godiva at 14:14 10 Jul 2010
True. I'm still having trouble with 'gottle o geer' though.
I told you training as ventriloquists would be useful one day.
By Lady Godiva at 14:16 10 Jul 2010
The tribe has spoken; you didn' win 'Survivor - Nazi Germany'!
I can't this competition anymore! I've held my arm up like this for 49 minutes!
By Stefano M. Stefano at 14:17 10 Jul 2010
Don't encourage the paparazzi, dumbass!
Hey! Look at me! Heeeyy! Take a picture of me!
By Stefano M. Stefano at 14:18 10 Jul 2010
A couple of sheep and a Shetland pony. Not that it's any of your beeswax.
What're you doing tonight Adolf.
By Lady Godiva at 14:18 10 Jul 2010
Eef you lift yer shtinky left arm beshide me, Mussi, you vill be in big trouble!
Mama mia I forgotta to dabba ona mya antiperspirenta!
By Stefano M. Stefano at 14:27 10 Jul 2010
Dumbass. Johnny Gilbert is never going to say "come on down!"
Pick me! Pick me! I hope they call my name!
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:57 10 Jul 2010
No, but I did "toast" the bride and groom.
Is it true that you were the best man at a Jewish wedding?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:59 10 Jul 2010
Yes, he's the one driving the Pink Panzer.
Is it true that you have a gay man in your tank command?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 15:01 10 Jul 2010
Yes! No! Yes! Make up your mind.
Are you still hearing voices?
By Bureau at 16:34 10 Jul 2010
BRING IT ON!!
What if you are crushed between the British, Americans and the Russians?
By Bureau at 16:36 10 Jul 2010
They're making me horny.
All these men passing by us is making me dizzy.
By Bureau at 17:23 10 Jul 2010
Not even if Berlin were invaded and we were trapped in a bunker.
Will you ever marry Eva Braun?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 17:32 10 Jul 2010
You want me to have Mengele to take a look at it for you?
I'm having a little bit of a heat rash in my arm pits.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 17:35 10 Jul 2010
Dumbkoff! I might need to head for Brazil where they speak Spanish!
Why are you learning to speak Spanish.
By Bureau at 18:59 10 Jul 2010
You smell like the original Italian Scallion!
I am the original Italian Stallion!
By Bureau at 19:01 10 Jul 2010
She should call it the limp spaghetti noodle.
My wife calls mine the big, greasy, Italian sausage.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:22 10 Jul 2010
Idiot American! He hates snakes and Nazis.
What did you think of that Indiana Jones movie?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 19:24 10 Jul 2010
You never know with those non-master race squinty eyes.
Do you think Hirohoto sees me waving that we're up here?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 20:58 10 Jul 2010
Acyually, he said the desert sucks, but I couldn't allow that to get out.
So Rommel is now The Desert Fox?
By Bureau at 21:56 10 Jul 2010
I think your people will turn YOU upside down.
We shall turn the world upside down!
By Bureau at 22:01 10 Jul 2010
I never forget errors, my friend. Napoleon was crazy. Just remember that.
Remember, the snows stopped Napoleon in Russia.
By Bureau at 22:02 10 Jul 2010
I, Hitler, no not quake before this Popeye. Is he a famous boxer?
The Americans have Popeye giving you two black eyes.
By Bureau at 22:05 10 Jul 2010
Same as every night, Pinky. We're going to take over the world!
So what are we doing tonight, Brain?
By Bureau at 22:14 10 Jul 2010
I see you mighty one hundred chariots have made it.
Over here, guys!
By Bureau at 00:13 11 Jul 2010
They are like children.
Plenty of room for goose-stepping in the back!
By Bureau at 00:17 11 Jul 2010
Who gives a Nazi's arse? There are dozens of them already and many more to come.
Adolf, did you know some of our captions have disappeared?
By Lady Godiva at 00:19 11 Jul 2010
About four days I think Mussi. Oy vey! I'm tired of standing here.
How long has it been now Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 00:20 11 Jul 2010
How man times are you going to ask me that dumb question Mussi?
Do you believe in God Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 00:22 11 Jul 2010
You are such a bloody idiot. We went through this one only yesterday.
Knock! Knock!
By Lady Godiva at 00:23 11 Jul 2010
No. Sometimes they have to read them three times to make sense of this crap.
Do you think everyone reads the bubbles in the correct order Adolf.
By Lady Godiva at 00:25 11 Jul 2010
One that will go down in history Mussi.
What kind of a name is Adolf...Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 00:26 11 Jul 2010
Don't read my bubble first, read Mussi's.
Don't read my bubble first. Read Adolf's.
By Lady Godiva at 00:27 11 Jul 2010
Lady Goviva's Cable just went out. Nothing on t.v. at the moment.
It's busy here tonight isn't it? I wonder why?
By Lady Godiva at 00:28 11 Jul 2010
Service in 15 minutes or its free my ass. My Reuben was cold again.
Check, check please, we've got a war to attend to.
By Charpa93 at 01:03 11 Jul 2010
Oh right! Like YOU know anything about underpants. You never wear any.
Stop complaining about your cold Reuben. You should wear thicker underpants.
By Lady Godiva at 01:05 11 Jul 2010
That's probably the ferret I put in your pants Mussi.
I feel something stirring Adolf.
By Lady Godiva at 01:06 11 Jul 2010
Yeah, but I'll bet you ten Marks Rommel can beat him in Africa.
General Patton called you a "paper hangin' son of a bitch."
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 02:11 11 Jul 2010
Funny, I'm thinking of invading there this summer.
I'm thinking of vacationing in Copenhagen this summer.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 02:12 11 Jul 2010
Enough about the damned '36 Olympics already!
Look, Jesse Owens is finally landing from his long jump.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 02:14 11 Jul 2010
The only thing I give gas to are the Jews.
Don't put mushrooms on the pizza, they give me gas.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 02:16 11 Jul 2010
Heil one!
How do you get a taxi in this new Berlin of yours then?
By Inchcock at 07:20 11 Jul 2010
You don't have to ask me if you've got to go to the loo Benito!
Shaddup!
By Inchcock at 07:21 11 Jul 2010
"Oh mu guts.."
Dida you lika my ravioli Adolph?
By Inchcock at 07:26 11 Jul 2010
Because my man boobs don't itch, you twit!
Why don't you slide your hand in your jacket like Napoleon?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:54 11 Jul 2010
YOU hear them under your bed, what's the difference?
So you hear voices in your head?
By Bureau at 15:05 11 Jul 2010
I know, theyre Lady Godiva's . The others don't want the competition.
Adolf, some of our captions have disappeared again.
By Lady Godiva at 15:44 11 Jul 2010
That's her fault then. No good complaining to us. What can WE do stuck here ?
Maybe Lady G. forgot to click the Create button.
By Lady Godiva at 15:46 11 Jul 2010
He couldn't grow bloody grass. He's always been jealous of my good looks.
I heard Mark Lowton's growing a moustache
By Lady Godiva at 15:49 11 Jul 2010
"Yes. I take my teeth out every night and give them a good upper-lipping!"
Is that what they call a "Toothbrush" mustache?"
By Bureau at 16:04 11 Jul 2010
You ARE a huge Sausage!
I have a huge Sausage!
By Bureau at 17:59 11 Jul 2010
I agree. You could lose your penis and not realize it for days.
Italian food is the best in the world!
By Bureau at 18:04 11 Jul 2010
Hmm! Moustachio for sure.
What's you favourite flavour of ice-cream Adolf.
By Lady Godiva at 18:07 11 Jul 2010
Who do you think will win the final of The World Cup Mussi?
I think The Netherlands have a 50% chance this year Adolf.
By Lady Godiva at 18:08 11 Jul 2010
I think Spain have a 50% chance Mussi. Unless The Netherlands beat them.
Who do you think will win the World cup final Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 18:10 11 Jul 2010
You hum it, I'll play it Mussi me old pal.
Do you know Erskin Quint Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 18:13 11 Jul 2010
I haven't a clue. I'll go and Google it when we've finished here.
What's 'genocide' Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 18:15 11 Jul 2010
Are you propositioning me or singing Lion King songs?
Can you feel the love tonight?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 18:49 11 Jul 2010
Make another "Top Secret" joke and I send you to Aushwitz.
Hey Adolf, I know a "little German."
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 18:59 11 Jul 2010
Were you shocked when Spain won the World Cup Adolf?
I'm not Adolf...YOU are you idiot.
By Lady Godiva at 23:08 11 Jul 2010
You. Talking out your ass.
What's that farty smell.
By Bureau at 23:25 11 Jul 2010
Look at them. We stand head and shoulders above them all!
I wonder why they think we are so great?
By Bureau at 23:36 11 Jul 2010
Unless Mark brings us down by tomorrow, I'm escaping across that desk top!
I may never move my arm again.
By Bureau at 23:38 11 Jul 2010
Umm, do I look gay in this uniform?
Of course not! Now please stop with that nonsense.
By funwithwords at 00:38 12 Jul 2010
I'm feeling quite the stud about now... how about you?
Oh yes! Yes! Yes, I am!
By funwithwords at 05:29 12 Jul 2010
So... are you available for the evening?
But of course, whatever you like, De Fuhrer.
By funwithwords at 05:37 12 Jul 2010
Where does the colonel keep his armies?
Shut up Adolf.
By Mark at 10:23 12 Jul 2010
You moron, we're playing Risk, not Clue.
It was Colonel Mustard in the Kitchen with the Revolver.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 13:37 12 Jul 2010
Practicing your English for when the allies win the war?
I surrender, I surrender, I surrender, I surrender...
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 13:39 12 Jul 2010
If Richard Simmons is there with measles, don't eat it.
The English Embassy invited me over for spotted Dick.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 13:41 12 Jul 2010
Because some asshole was too cheap to buy color film.
Hey Adolf, why does everything look gray?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:50 12 Jul 2010
Must be an over-compensated inferiority complex.
Hey Adolf, the eagle on my hat is bigger than the one on yours.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 14:51 12 Jul 2010
My Fahrtleiter
Who IS that guy with the cigarette behind you Adolf?
By Lynton at 15:07 12 Jul 2010
I know,I know, Lady G. was going to do one about the eagles on our hats!
Rember back a couple of captions Adolf.......or is that 'forwards' I'm confused.
By Lady Godiva at 15:49 12 Jul 2010
What the hell are you muttering about now Mussi?
Don't you think It'd be easier if they had the 'first' 'last' Adolf?
By Lady Godiva at 15:50 12 Jul 2010
Why are you trying to be a human sundial, you moron!
I can tell you which way north is!
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 15:52 12 Jul 2010
At least my hat keeps the sun out of my eyes.
With my hat, I don't sunburn my head.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 15:53 12 Jul 2010
Easier access for pocket pool, you doofus.
Hey Adolf, why do you have such huge pockets?
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 15:57 12 Jul 2010
Bloody hell! Are you STILL going on about THAT.
I think the first caption should be the last. Coz it gets confusing at times.
By Lady Godiva at 17:10 12 Jul 2010
Oh? Isn't he that stupid ref. who loves giving yellow cards?
I feel like Harold Webb right now.
By Lady Godiva at 17:12 12 Jul 2010
I told you not to play with that bloody computer Mussi.
I've just Googled myself and found out how I die.
By Lady Godiva at 17:16 12 Jul 2010
Nein!
Do you want to know how you die Adolf? I can Google you!
By Lady Godiva at 17:17 12 Jul 2010
Your cock is too small.
I'd love to take in an old-fashioned cockfight!
By Bureau at 17:46 12 Jul 2010
Well stop hanging around with fascists.
Adolf, my ankles are sore.
By Lady Godiva at 17:47 12 Jul 2010
Stop worrying. There's a worldwide power struggle on.
Damn! I can't remember if I left the iron on or not.
By Lady Godiva at 17:49 12 Jul 2010
Think we should tell Lady G that if she presses Prev she can get the last first?
Nah, let's keep it under our hats - they're big enough.
By Mark at 19:22 12 Jul 2010
Hey Musso, look: there's Anna Chapman!
Oh yes, I see... Think she's a natural redhead?
By funwithwords at 20:09 12 Jul 2010
I heard you. She said she'd known all along and was winding you up moron!
I talked to Lady G. about the first and last thing.
By Lady Godiva at 20:28 12 Jul 2010
Do you have to keep rubbing the 'medal thing' in? Schweinhund!
Do you have any Brasso Adolf? My medals need polishing.
By Lady Godiva at 20:36 12 Jul 2010
I give up. DAMN! I SAID I'D NEVER SAY THOSE THREE WORDS. You tricked me!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
By Lady Godiva at 20:44 12 Jul 2010
What do the readers of these captions expect when we only have one bubble each?
Knock,knock. Whose there? Boo ! Boo Who? No need to cry. It's not that bad.
By Lady Godiva at 22:56 12 Jul 2010
Shut up.
What? I didn't say anything!
By funwithwords at 01:39 13 Jul 2010
Scheissen - tell me about it Mussi. He's getting on my man boobs too.
I hate that fella Mark for leaving us here so bloody long. It's pissing me off
By Lady Godiva at 05:44 13 Jul 2010
So Spain won the World Cup and Germany didn't. Give it a rest Mussi.
Ole, ole, ole, ole. Ole. Ole. Ole, ole, ole, ole. Ole. Ole.
By Lady Godiva at 05:52 13 Jul 2010
Stir-fried Octopus with Mark Lowton on 'the side'. How about you Mussi?
What do you fancy for dinner Adolf? It's been a strange week.
By Lady Godiva at 05:55 13 Jul 2010
Don't you think everyone is really impatient these days?
Yeah, for sure, I mean, I only change my pants once a week.
By Mark at 06:47 13 Jul 2010
Oh, I think you'll be hanging around Italy for some time.
I will come back to see you again!
By Bureau at 20:46 13 Jul 2010
No, you may not!
May I go to the toilet, please?
By Monkey Woods at 00:17 15 Jul 2010
Good morning!
Good morning!
By Monkey Woods at 00:17 15 Jul 2010
What are those things dangling from your pocket?
Look, mein Fuhrer, an eagle!
By Monkey Woods at 00:19 15 Jul 2010
I just wet my trousers, Il Duce!
Ha ha, better than having a crap in them.
By whatinthe world at 11:04 15 Jul 2010
Have you tried a grease and oil change, Il Duce?
My right arm refuses to move, what do I do Fuhrer?
By whatinthe world at 11:08 15 Jul 2010
My undervear is pulling on mien vitals
Told you not buy at Primart!
By Herrdoktorfox at 19:29 16 Jul 2010
Zat fucking curry is killing me Mussi.
...and I thought it was the drains.....Christ play the white man Adolf!!
By Herrdoktorfox at 19:30 16 Jul 2010
I think I'm getting an erection Mussi.
....na na nana...beat you there cobber!
By Herrdoktorfox at 19:31 16 Jul 2010
I'd love a blow job from zat bird in zer third row second left.
Don't waste your time Fuhrer see won't swallow
By Herrdoktorfox at 19:34 16 Jul 2010
What do you call a little German in a tin Mussi?
Heinz!
By Herrdoktorfox at 19:36 16 Jul 2010
I can feel the 'head of ze turtle' Mussi what zer hell can I do?
I suggest bicycle clips immediately Fuhrer.
By Herrdoktorfox at 19:53 16 Jul 2010
"Fancy a drink after the Parade Mussi?
Nah, I drink to much. last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.
By Herrdoktorfox at 19:56 16 Jul 2010
Any idea who will win the 4.30pm at Cheltenham today Mussi?"
"You're asking me already?.....is da Pope Jewish or what!"
By Herrdoktorfox at 20:04 16 Jul 2010
"Bollocks to this, I'm off down the pub to try and pull that new barmaid Helga"
"OK, I'll cover for you Fuhrer ask her if she has a friend will you mate?"
By Herrdoktorfox at 20:09 16 Jul 2010
Fucking ironic ain't it, I march into Poland and they all scarper to the UK!
Tell me about it son, I ain't had a fucking weekend off for years!
By Herrdoktorfox at 20:48 16 Jul 2010
Do you know a cure for itching piles Mussi?
Not really Fuhrer, who sings it?
By Herrdoktorfox at 20:49 16 Jul 2010
For fucks sake give it a rest Mussi you're doing my fucking head in!
"GO COMPARE, GO COMPARE, GO COMPARE!"
By Herrdoktorfox at 20:51 16 Jul 2010
I'm sure that bird gave me crabs last night.
I have a nice little wine indoors Fuhrer if you fancy sharing them later?
By Herrdoktorfox at 20:53 16 Jul 2010
Try and keep up Mussi I think Simon Cowell is about to hit the buzzer on us!
I'm doing the best I can Fuhrer but these boots are killing me!
By Herrdoktorfox at 20:55 16 Jul 2010
"Quick, Mussi here comes another bloody cab, make sure he see's you this time!"
"I'm doing my best Fuhrer but I think the driver is Jewish!"
By Herrdoktorfox at 17:57 17 Jul 2010
"How did your meeting with the Pope go Mussi?"
Notso good, you have to kiss his ring-so dis time he has it in his back pocket
By Herrdoktorfox at 19:49 17 Jul 2010
"You know Mussi, my Doctor says I have the brain of a 4 year old!"
"Jeez, I bet he was glad to get rid of it!"
By Herrdoktorfox at 19:55 17 Jul 2010
"Fuck it, I've half a mind to vote New Labour next time Mussi!"
"Half a mind is all you need Fuhrer"
By Herrdoktorfox at 11:11 18 Jul 2010
I'm having serious problems vocusing of late Mussi.
Me to Fuhrer every day I am pissing on my shiny boots, in the krapper!
By Herrdoktorfox at 20:16 18 Jul 2010
Do the Porky Pig thing again! It always cracks me up.
Abet, ah-bit That's All Folks!!
By Bureau at 00:32 20 Jul 2010
I see Larry Fine finally made it.
We should have called in Shemp!
By Bureau at 18:42 22 Jul 2010
You know Mussi I bet zat Katy Perry is a real little goer in bed?
Tell me about it, I get an erection just thinking about giving her my Salami!
By Herrdoktorfox at 16:06 23 Jul 2010
I'll bet her titties are touching Laura's shoes.
The Queen sure didn't age very well since the 40's.
By Throckmorton Turdblossom at 18:20 06 Aug 2010
There's one
Taxi
By Xavier at 21:17 06 Aug 2010
Put your hand down or I will hang you up by your heels!
Me, Me Me - I know - please miss!!!!!!!!
By Xavier at 07:15 08 Aug 2010
I'm so very proud that he's finally made it. He's been like a son to me.
I can't believe the Americans, who knew all you had to do was be a black man.
By OIF2Sniper at 19:19 05 Sep 2010
Mussi, can Sarah Palin really see your house from Alaska?
Ohh yes, everytime I come home she starts sending me pics of her "Pet Beaver"
By OIF2Sniper at 19:27 05 Sep 2010
Are you sure she can see us?
Yes yes, Palin always is looking, just wave.
By OIF2Sniper at 19:29 05 Sep 2010
What are you doing Her Mussolini?
Trying to flag down a Taxi you fool what else!
By Kazytc at 00:57 25 Sep 2010
Bought my wife a new gas oven last week
Oh I thought I haven't seen her around lately
By Kazytc at 13:37 25 Sep 2010
No need to flag a taxi down we'll take the bus
Think there's a taxi coming now Her Hitler
By Kazytc at 13:39 25 Sep 2010
It's still better than Churchill's cheesy Victory salute.
Couldn't you develop a new fascist gesture? One that doesn't cause arm ache?
By alexc at 14:48 25 Sep 2010
Don't you ever shave under your arms?
Have you got X ray eyes Hitler, only I'm wearing my jacket
By Kazytc at 18:50 26 Sep 2010
Aber du hast kein Rhythmus, Benny... (But you have zero rhythm, Benito...)
LOOK -- I can put my hand in the air like I "just don't care"!
By SpaceElevator at 13:17 20 Oct 2010
Catalogue pose: I'll do the moody stare, and you point into the distance
Righty-o Adolph! Has anyone ever pointed out you look like the spoof globe?
By mickrikko at 14:25 04 Dec 2010
You shaddup!
No. YOU shaddup. Arsehole.
By PuddyTwat at 17:49 09 Feb 2011
Who likes my mostache?
I DO! I DO!
By Griff at 15:04 06 Mar 2011
Who likes my mostache?
I DO! I DO!
By Griff at 15:07 06 Mar 2011
Winston says I'll only ever rule Europe when pigs fly
Yes Adie Baby. Keep looking up there.
By Steddyeddy at 12:46 28 Mar 2011
No stupid. It's just my ride. I'm ready to blow this place.
You idiot! Would you look where I'm pointing? It's a UFO!!!!!!!!!
By Aspartame Boy at 05:46 08 May 2011
Why are all the Rome cab drivers ignoring you?
Perhaps the word's gone round that I don't tip
By Tommy Twinkle at 22:30 15 Jun 2011
Nine, way too high you twat
Is this how you do a nazi salut
By Les Being at 20:47 02 Jul 2011
Hide, Rebekah Brooks is comming
I'm off
By Les Being at 10:28 08 Jul 2011
What is it with your right arm? You should see a specialist, son.
It hasn't moved since 1923 when I went to get a wine bottle off the top shelf.
By whatinthe world at 13:14 15 Aug 2011
What's that smell...?
If I raisa my hand, I willa looka taller than Adolfo...
By WilliamGerard at 17:03 18 Dec 2011
How do you feel about hanging?
I don't like to hang around anywhere?
By David Gordy at 21:59 24 May 2012
How do you feel about hanging?
My jury will be hung if it comes to that.
By David Gordy at 22:01 24 May 2012
I like your army, Benito, very smartly attired.
Thankyou, Herr Fuhrer. Albania is that way you morons.
By whatinthe world at 13:49 29 May 2012
Okay, hands up if you have raped your mother. Goodness!!
I was only sixteen at the time.
By whatinthe world at 13:53 29 May 2012
Hands up if you like peanut and jelly sandwiches for lunch.
Every day Herr Fuhrer! Hey who threw that boiled egg at me?
By whatinthe world at 13:57 29 May 2012
Hands up if you enjoy cross dressing. My!!!
What do you think of my latest outfit?
By whatinthe world at 13:58 29 May 2012
Hands up if you want to start World War Two.
Bring it on, Herr Fuhrer!
By whatinthe world at 14:01 29 May 2012
Hands up if you like dancing to my tune.
Um, yeah that's me. Look if it gets a bit hot in Libya, come and get us.
By whatinthe world at 14:09 29 May 2012
Hands up if you like the smell of burning jews.
Umm, yah! Count me in.
By whatinthe world at 06:14 07 Jun 2012
Hands up if you suffer from piles.
Yes, too much pizza and pasta I'm afraid.
By whatinthe world at 06:17 07 Jun 2012
Irenee DuPont? That's not an alien name?
So, DID you get help from Aliens?
By Oleg the Tumor at 20:04 11 Jun 2012
jien et inzomm zaqqi ax qabduni imsarni bil biza landi minkom !!!
forza azzuriiii!!!!!
By darren ir roma :P at 21:22 25 Jun 2012
He was never offside
Fuck you Hitler he was miles offside
By JEv at 18:49 28 Jun 2012
Attack, attack, attack ,attack ,attack
Time for the long ball game
By JEv at 18:51 28 Jun 2012
I've got a griping in my gut!
And I've got too much starch in my damn coat!
By Mario at 19:31 01 Oct 2012
Hold your fucking horses,im waiting for Wilky to ring.
Fuck this shit shall we go Pub ?
By lee at 14:21 03 Nov 2012
Whenever ye have need, once a month, ye shall say HEIL when the moon is full...
Listen to the words of the Fuhrer, who was called by many other names.
By Rocko the Zen Wallaby at 06:36 22 Mar 2013
I'm not wearning any underwear.
Check please!
By Butch32 at 01:11 29 Nov 2013
I swear, if I eat one more of your calzones, my gut is going to pop!
Fair enough. And if I have to salute one more time, my arm will fall off!
By Smart Blonde Bimbo at 20:25 22 Dec 2013
These cab drivers always refuse to pick up Krauts and Dagos. Damn Racists!
Taxi! Over here!
By Al N. at 05:13 21 Oct 2014
I wouldn't know. Don't goose-step and my balls were bayoneted off in the War...
I hear all that goose stepping wrecks havoc on the balls...
By Don Grapper at 19:46 27 Feb 2015
Ya, schnel. I've got indigestion from that undercooked wienerschnitzel.
I'll hail us a cab back to the hotel.
By Dick Sheerer at 07:55 11 Jun 2015
We need holograms, America will not be fooled by these flying rabbit shadows.
But if I point my finger up, the silhouette becomes a Messerschmitt plane, see?
By Tommy Twinkle at 11:09 14 Feb 2016
Better to rule in Hell than serve in Heaven!
You know we're both going to hell?
By Al N. at 07:13 20 Dec 2016
I may have a small dick and only one ball but even I could get it up for her.
What are those? 42 Double D's? What did I-a tell you about Italiano women?
By Al N. at 04:58 25 Dec 2016
I hear this Trump guy is supposed to make us look like absolute geniuses.
Well, he certainly isn't winning any IQ contests.
By Al N. at 20:44 14 Mar 2017
Trump called again today. I disguised my voice and said I wasn't in.
Man! That pest! He's the reason I've stopped answering my phone at all!
By Al N. at 19:59 17 Mar 2017
I will make sure every taxi that doesn't stop will be very sorry they didn't!!
Taxi!
By Al N. at 00:59 14 Apr 2017
The idea of it came to me when I was painting a ceiling a few years ago.
Well, the salute causes Italian people to look up to see what I'm pointing at
By Tommy Twinkle at 11:20 03 Jun 2017
I wish I hadn't eaten that rubbish they served for dinner, my guts ache.
My people will turn against you if you blame it on their Italian ravioli.
By Tommy Twinkle at 00:34 20 Jun 2017
No, the bus is cheaper, I'm not going to waste my money on taxi fares
I've had enough of you today, you're a tight-fisted German git. "Oy-oy, TAXI!"
By Tommy Twinkle at 07:25 02 Jul 2017
So where is it? I was told Mount Vesuvius can be seen from this city of Naples.
It's there!
By Tommy Twinkle at 22:45 06 Jul 2017
Point him out, I'll have him executed at least 4 times!
There is a man out there not saluting!
By Al N. at 23:38 07 Jul 2017
See that fishing boat on the horizon, find out if they have fresh cod on board
I'll raise my arm to catch the captain's attention to to ask him.
By Tommy Twinkle at 07:29 09 Jul 2017
Either the vino at lunch has disagreed with my stomach or I've just been shot
It'll be a golfer, he's sliced his tee shot from the eighteenth over there.
By Tommy Twinkle at 07:52 09 Jul 2017
When all the people disappear that don't like you, it sends the ratings way up!
I hear you have the highest popularity rating ever! How do you do it?
By Al N. at 04:45 20 Nov 2017
Why are you doing that?
I keep high-fiving the crowd, and they always leaving me hanging.
By Ben Macnair at 16:55 06 Jan 2018
Because of you I had to kill myself and make sure my body was unidentifiable.
Well, at least I got to hang around with my mistress longer than you.
By Al N. at 08:00 29 Oct 2018
It's not true that the Idiot Trump was more evil than us.
True Dat! He is just totally an idiot and not smart to have an ideology.
By Al N. at 23:05 18 Dec 2018
No, it will catch on.
My arm is stuck!
By Butch at 00:09 02 Apr 2020
%u201CWhat do you call a little German in a tin MUSSI%u201D
%u201CHeinz%u201D
By Herrdoktorfox at 13:11 07 Aug 2022
%u201CI%u2019m sure that fraulein gab
%u201CHeinz%u201D
By Herrdoktorfox at 13:13 07 Aug 2022
%u201CI%u2019m sure that fraulein gave me crabs last night%u201D
%u201CI have a nice little wine indoors if you want to share later.%u201D
By Herrdoktorfox at 13:15 07 Aug 2022
%u201CWe%u2019ll never get a taxi at this rate of
%u201CI have a nice little wine indoors if you want to share later.%u201D
By Herrdoktorfox at 13:16 07 Aug 2022
%u201CWe%u2019ll never get a taxi at this rate Adolf%u201D
%u201CBloody rail strikes, that RMT have much to answer for%u201D
By Herrdoktorfox at 13:17 07 Aug 2022

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