Spoof news events on this day in history
Jungle King And Rat Killer Gino - Salt Of The Earth. Jordan Furious.
(2009) I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here, King Of The Jungle, Italian chef Gino D'Acampo was slammed as a cheat today, allegedly, by uber breasted drink swiller Jordan. D'Acampo was accused of smuggling tea, coffee, sugar and salt into the jungle camp,...Read full story
Nana Mouskouri is a 'babe' say scientists
(2008) Scientists from the Stan Butler University in Cockney Land, London. Have announced that seventies, Greek Songstress Nana Mouskouri is a hot mamma. "In the past she was stigmatised as a, reet boiler" said Professor Nomoney Jones. "However she shou...Read full story
Trump to Persecute People Who Say "Happy Holidays"
(2016) Trump transition team member Corey Lewandowski derailed a decent conversation on Hannity by making a strangely worded announcement about Christmas. During the Tuesday interview, Lewandowski tried to steer the conversation away from legitimate crit...Read full story
Official - American Football Is For Pussies
(2009) (Defecated News) Having deliberated over the last two years, IOC chiefs have rejected the USA's request to consider American 'Football' as a sport worthy of being in the Olympics. Sergio Buttokini, President of the IOC summarised the findings in...Read full story
New 'Wii Wank' Game Released
(2009) (Defecated News) The race to be the year's favourite toy is an important one for parents, but more so for the manufacturers and retailers with almost 30% of typical annual turnover coming from the festive season alone. An entertainment company has l...Read full story
Caddie Gives "Full Support for Tiger Woods"
(2009) From his home in New Zealand, a caddie stated today that he "fully supports Tiger" while he wrestles with Elin Woods over his harem of blond shankster girls. The caddy, a major sidekick sportster dude from his million dollar a year job with Wood...Read full story
Hussein's "Body Double" Defense Falls Apart; Seeks Insanity Plea
(2005) BAGHDAD, Iraq Dec 8, 2005 - Saddam Hussein's claim that he wasn't really the former dictator of Iraq but rather a body-double fell apart today when one of the real body doubles positively identified him. "Yeah, that's him...so...can I go now?" said A...Read full story
Green Onions Cause Taco Bell E-Coli Outbreak
(2006) The cause of the Taco Bell E-Coli outbreak has been traced to green onions possibly imported from Mexico. In response, the fast food chain has pulled all onions from all of its United States locations. Chemical analysis of the product shows traces...Read full story
Britian to run off Poo by 2015!
(2009) In a shocking 4am announcement tonight the Green Party have unveiled a stunning agenda to fight the next general election. They have revealed a double hit on both global warming and the economy with the startling announcement that within three ye...Read full story
Bush and Blair test positive with Polonium 210
(2006) In the ongoing radiation poisoning saga, the toxic Polonium 210 has infected two more victims. President George W. Bush and Prime Minister Tony Blair have both tested positive with Polonium 210 poisoning. The highly radioactive material is deadly, bu...Read full story
Meredith Baxter Confesses: "How Hanging Out With Ineffectual Men In '80's Television Turned Me Gay"
(2009) Los Angeles, California - Along Pacific Coast Highway No. 1, past the pier at Venice Beach, past the seaside condos of Santa Monica, nestled in the hills northwest of the city proper, sits Meredith Baxter, former television mom and now fully fledged...Read full story
Justin Bieber is not a Robot Say Friends.
(2010) Friends of Justin Bieber have tonight revealed the sensational news that Justin is not what certain people are saying he is. They say Justin would be severely upset if he knew what people were saying about him and they have urged the media not to re...Read full story
Man Executed in Saudi Made 'Boobies' Out Of Sand
(2009) SAUDI ARABIA (Defecated News) - A British man was executed last night after a failed last minute bid by diplomats and ministers to have him set free. Tony Hart (18) of Birmingham was arrested last week after Saudi police responded to locals who compl...Read full story
O.J. Simpson Gets 33 Years
(2008) Las Vegas, Nevada: Gridiron great O.J. Simpson will serve at least nine years in prison for his role in an armed confrontation with sports memorabilia dealers in a Las Vegas hotel in 2007. O.J. Simpson told the judge Friday that he was sorry for...Read full story
FDA and US Agriculture Dept. Approve Cola as Pesticides
(2008) WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - The US Food and Drug Administration and the Department of Agriculture have jointly approved the use of cola as pesticides in farming and general pest control both outdoors and indoors. The two government organizations had...Read full story
Memorial Service for Space Shuttle Discovery Crew Already Planned
(2006) NASA, hours before launch has, according to inside sources already planned for the recovery, investigation and memorial service for all 7 members of the shuttle crew. "We believe that Discovery's going to blow, we just don't know how&quo...Read full story
Trump Beheads Bears Ears, plans partial decapitation of Mount Rushmore
(2017) Somewhere in Utah. After chopping off the head of Bears Ears National Monument, Utah, Trump is now honing his Trump© axe, according to several unnamed high-ranking sources, to hack away at just about all of this country's national parks. "It...Read full story
Lesbian Daughter of V.P. Dick Cheney Pregnant
(2006) The openly gay daughter of United States Vice President Dick Cheney has announced that she is expecting a baby. News of the announcement brought concern, curiosity, and speculation as to the identity of the father from Washington insiders, other fam...Read full story
Gnomes go on strike!
(2003) The NUG (national union of Gnomes) announced this week that huge numbers of Gnomes will join others in striking this week in protest of low wages. 'Payment for Gnomes is a a record low, down 20% on last year. We thought we had ended Gnome discrim...Read full story
IRA Refuse Paisley Photograph Demand
(2004) The IRA have said there is absolutely no chance whatsoever of any of its members posing for portraits for Ian Paisley, despite the fact that doing so could restore devolution to Northern Ireland.Read full story
Bush Baghdad visit "less realistic" than moon landing
(2003) Nine out of ten Americans think that George W Bush's recent Thanksgiving Day trip to Baghdad was staged - many saying they believed the 1969 moon landing to be "more realistic".Read full story
NSA: EVERYONE has been Poisoned by the KGB
(2006) Following today's revelation that former Soviet contact Dmitry Kovtun fell into a coma after testing positive for polonium-210 poisoning the National Security Agency reluctantly told Americans "the bad news first". During a 12 minute r...Read full story