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Spoof news events on this day in history

Funny story: President Bush Arrested on Molestation Charges

President Bush Arrested on Molestation Charges

(2005) White House Presidential spokesperson Kid Fiddler, shocked media correspondents gathered this morning for President Bush's weekly presentation on Cross Stitch for Beginners.

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Funny story: Shocking News Coming Out Of Australia Is That Kate Gosselin Had The P*e Kicked Out Of Her By A Deranged Kangaroo

Shocking News Coming Out Of Australia Is That Kate Gosselin Had The P*e Kicked Out Of Her By A Deranged Kangaroo

(2011) BRISBANE, Australia - Word coming out from 'The Land Down Under' is that Kate Gosselin, star of Kate Plus 8 was viciously kicked by what is being described by an Australian game warden as a deranged kangaroo. Kate and her eight brats, ah make that kids, had flown to Australia, the home of Keith Urban, Nicole Kidman, Mel Gibson, and Mick Dundee, to film some episodes for her award-winning cable...

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Funny story: Man City: "We will literally destroy Man U"

Man City: "We will literally destroy Man U"

(2011) Manchester City boss Roberto Mancini has promised his club's fans something special this weekend in their long-awaited cup tie with rivals Manchester United. He said, "We will absolutely smash them. They will be picking up the pieces for months af...

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Funny story: Poland Bans Anorectic Models

Poland Bans Anorectic Models

(2008) Following the lead of her more senior European Union neighbors, France and Spain, the Polish Parliament has passed legislation that will discourage anorectic models from sauntering down the nascent fashion industry's catwalks.

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Funny story: Surprisingly, study by scientists finds that muscular men make the worst boyfriends

Surprisingly, study by scientists finds that muscular men make the worst boyfriends

(2018) A study by scientists has found that the type of men that used to bully them in school make the worst type of boyfriend. 'Yes' said Leonard Oxygen 'it may look like sour grapes, but we have found, scientifically, and factually, that science and fa...

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Funny story: Woman Charged in Beating Death of Personal Computer

Woman Charged in Beating Death of Personal Computer

(2004) SEATTLE, WASHINGTON - Microsoft systems analyst, Melinda Bates was charged today with manslaughter in the beating death of her personal office computer "Ted". The body of the computer was found by hikers, out on a day hike, under heavy bru...

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Funny story: Mueller Report Released, With Redactions

Mueller Report Released, With Redactions

(2019) Anticipation is building towards the release of Robert Mueller’s report on interaction between the Donald Trump campaign and Russia. Will the report show collusion between the future president and a hostile foreign power? Many Democrats believe so, w...

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Funny story: Mel Gibson divorce settlement declared bank robbery

Mel Gibson divorce settlement declared bank robbery

(2009) Mel Gibson may soon end up as the Hollywood actor with the biggest hole in his pocket. Critics declare his divorce settlement a form of legal bank robbery. Robyn Gibson who has been labeled Gold Fingers, 53, is legally entitled in their divorce to...

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Funny story: Marco Pierre White To Have Bandana Surgically Removed

Marco Pierre White To Have Bandana Surgically Removed

(2009) Just in. (They actually woke me up from a lovely nap.) - Celebrity TV chef Marco Pierre White, who despite his exotic sounding name was actually brought up on a dead rough council estate in Leeds is to have his trademark bandana surgically removed on...

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Funny story: Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson Apologize to Duke

Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson Apologize to Duke

(2007) In a stunning turn of events, Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson have apologized to Duke University. In a written statement slipped under the door late night, it read:...

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Funny story: SpongeBob NRA Partnership Ends In Tragic Shooting

SpongeBob NRA Partnership Ends In Tragic Shooting

(2007) (Provo--UT) "As Charlton Heston is my witness, I didn't think you could kill a cartoon character." That was the statement of disbelief uttered by NRA Executive Vice President, Wayne LaPierre, when he was informed that SpongeBob SquarePa...

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Funny story: Rev. Sharpton and Rev. Jackson Demand Ellen Degeneres' Job

Rev. Sharpton and Rev. Jackson Demand Ellen Degeneres' Job

(2007) Rev. Al Sharpton and Rev. Jessee Jackson were outraged at a comment made on air by Ellen Degeneres. They are now demanding that NBC network officials fire her over her racist remarks.

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Funny story: Trump's Apprentice Sends Construction Workers to ER on Day One

Trump's Apprentice Sends Construction Workers to ER on Day One

(2004) Bill Rancic, winner of the reality show "The Apprentice", and now, President of some Trump company, burned two construction workers who are building the Chicago skyscraper that Rancic is overseeing.

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Funny story: Don Imus Gets Job Offer From MC Hammer

Don Imus Gets Job Offer From MC Hammer

(2007) Don Imus, the former radio shock jock who was fired for controversial remarks about the Rutgers University women's basketball team, has obtained a new job. The man most recently famous for talking about nappy headed hos will now write lyrics abo...

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Funny story: William and Middleton Split Over Gingham Dress

William and Middleton Split Over Gingham Dress

(2007) Speculation continues into why Prince William and Kate Middleton have ended their Four year relationship. Sources close to the Palace have hinted that it may have been Prince William's insistence that he wears a gingham pinafore dress and sings a...

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Funny story: Leighton Meester Dating Derek Hough of Dancing With The Stars

Leighton Meester Dating Derek Hough of Dancing With The Stars

(2010) LOS ANGELES - The latest rumor circulating out of Tinsel Town is that electro pop diva Leighton Meester has been seen on several dates with Derek Hough of Dancing With The Stars fame. Meester reportedly stated that her and Derek do happen to have...

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Funny story: Pope Benedict XVI to allow cunnilingus

Pope Benedict XVI to allow cunnilingus

(2008) In a stunning reversal to previous papal policies, Pope Benedict XVI announced before a crowd of US onlookers outside St. Dominic Church in Washington that women will now be allowed to receive cunnilingus. Women in the crowd cheered the Pope's d...

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Funny story: "Woody Woodpecker" Goes Straight to DVD, Shockingly

"Woody Woodpecker" Goes Straight to DVD, Shockingly

(2018) Recently, film buffs were taken with surprise to see DVD ads for the 2017 film Woody Woodpecker. It is quite clear from the preview that we are dealing with a cinematic masterpiece. The film delivers a powerful environmental message as the titular bi...

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Funny story: Round the world dog swimmer loses its way!

Round the world dog swimmer loses its way!

(2019) After setting off from San Francisco, a round the world dog swimmer, heading towards Japan, got swept off its course and was knackered after fighting off great whites, Portuguese-man-of war jelly fish (what the F are they doing in the Pacific??) and,...

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Funny story: Citibank release "ambiguous" Q1 earnings

Citibank release "ambiguous" Q1 earnings

(2009) Suprise hit the banking community today as Citibank released their 2009 Q1 earnings summary. Widely hailed by banking experts as being a likely barometer as to whether the economy is recovering, it appears the focus and widespread scrutiny of the...

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Funny story: Vanessa Hudgens And Brenda Song Fight For UK Recognition

Vanessa Hudgens And Brenda Song Fight For UK Recognition

(2009) London. Just after breakfast time. - US teen queens Vanessa Hudgens and Brenda Song today walked the streets of London town in a bid to gain recognition in the UK. The pair buried the hatchet in an attempt to crack the UK market, and hung around T...

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Funny story: Sir Alex Ferguson Throws Hairdryer At Paul Scholes

Sir Alex Ferguson Throws Hairdryer At Paul Scholes

(2011) Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson has revisited his old stamping ground of hairdryers after watching his side lose out in their FA Cup semi-final against arch-rivals Manchester City at Wembley Stadium this afternoon. Fergie watched from...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart & Soul Transfer

Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart & Soul Transfer

(2010) Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart, are not just interested in vampires, they are fascinated with a case of possible soul transfer in Croatia. A 13 year old girl from the Croatian town of Knin, fell into a mysterious coma and later woke up spe...

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