Spoof news events on this day in history
(2010) Redskins Head Coach Shanahan: "Eagles Darkie QB Much Better Than Ours."
Mike Shanahan finally admitted it: No, not that he is the most famous colored-hating racist in the Washington, DC-Metro Area since Senator Strom Thurmond, but that his team blows monkeys, as proven by the Eagles' 28 point 1st quarter pummeling of the...Read full story
(2010) Palace warned that Diana's ring is hexed
London - (Portents): "Just what kind of cheapskate refuses to fork out for brand new bling anyway?" disgusted marriage guidance counsellors asked today. "William's determined to spin out that rubbishy old Diana mythology. It could so easily backf...Read full story
(2011) Amy Winehouse 'ghost' spooked by appearance of Pete Doherty, says Derek Acorah
A ghost, purportedly that of recently deceased songstress Amy Winehouse, was spooked into vanishing back into the afterlife after apparently catching a glimpse of former Libertine's front man, Pete Doherty, according to celebrity TV medium Derek Acor...Read full story
(2008) Cold caller dies of hypothermia
Door to door double glazing salesman Hugh Peeveesea was found dead in a Swansea street this morning, apparently from acute hypothermia. At first, it was suspected that Mr Peeveesea was another statistic in the tragic Bridgend suicide cult that has...Read full story
(2010) Bieber Fever Hits British Fans As Justin Bieber On World Tour
The unofficial new King of Pop, according to six million followers at last count, is about to hit the road on a world tour beginning early next year. Since the tour will begin in Britain, be sure to watch for ticket sales as dates are not settled...Read full story
(2009) Carrie To Market "Peace In The Valley" Sex Toys To Christian Book Stores.
Carrie Prejean held a press conference today to announce a new product line that she will market to Christian book stores all across the country. "There is nothng in the bible about breast implants and there is nothing in the bible about persona...Read full story
(2008) Prime Minister has meeting with Jabba The Hutt
MANCHESTER- Prime Minister Gordon Brown has met with Jabba the Hutt in Manchester today to discuss the worldwide financial crisis. Mr. Hutt, a known philanthropist and shrewd investor, has displayed in interest in helping the world economies with...Read full story
(2011) Porno infiltrators attack Facebook and they didn't even peep!
Facebook, the friendly chat and contact internet service have been attacked by cyber porno infiltrators attempting to get their rather naughty messages across (the crutch mainly). The owners of Facebook were appalled at this vile attack of lovely...Read full story
(2008) Homely Secretary Smith to Crack the Whip on Sex for Pay and Lap dances
Home Secretary Jacqui Smith is sick and tired of having to pay for sex and even fork over a quid just for a little shimmy on the lap. Smith will try to restore the time honored British tradition of coming home from the Home Secretary's office after a...Read full story
(2010) Apple Unable to Play Beatles White Album Backwards
Scoring a musical coup by securing the entire Beatles song catalog, Apple will be releasing individual songs and full album offerings as early as next month, in time for the holiday season. There is a glitch to the functionality when compared to the...Read full story
(2011) Adolescent sex can stunt growth and spark depression, according to study on hamsters
If you're looking for ways to put your adolescent children off having sex try this one: "It'll stop you growing…" Scientists claim teenage romps can also spark depression and autoimmune system conditions such as irritable bowel syndrome. They susp...Read full story
(2010) Bizarre: Coronation Street Demonstrations Reach Fever Pitch.
A surge of activity both online and 'on the street' has errupted, as D-Day looms for some of the stars of Britain's greatest archive of modern life, Coronation Street. Viewers have begun petitioning Parliament and staging demonstrations up and dow...Read full story
(2010) Double-Barrel Madness Must Stop Say Registrars
Tired of endless double-barrelled surnames, UK registrars have called for common sense to prevail. A recent trend for both partners in a marriage to keep their family names and put them together is causing complications in the registrars' record k...Read full story
(2010) Brett Favre Hurts Shoulder Texting
Minneapolis, MN - Brett Favre hurt his throwing shoulder while texting a Vikings cheerleader. "I went to hit send on my cellphone and it slipped from hand, and when I tried to catch the phone I felt a tingle in my shoulder." Brett Favre told rep...Read full story
(2007) Winehouse tour manager quits amid passive crack smoke complaint
Birmingham - (Powerlessness Mess): Too many crack cocaine fumes in Amy Winehouse's touring bus have been blamed on her manager Thom Stone quitting just days after the start of her UK sell-out tour.Read full story
(2003) That Bush Interview in Full
One week before his long-awaited visit to the UK, President Bush faced a challenging interview by children's toy, Mr Frosty. Here are the key points from the historic interview…...Read full story
(2010) November 30th Planet Alignment Will Give You Floating Sensation If Lying On Your Bed
Both British and American scientists are excited about what may happen on November 30th during a twelve-hour period that day. "If you lie down flat on your back on your bed, the gravity pull of the sun on the three planets in a line will make you...Read full story
(2007) Bonds: "They Weren't Performance Enhancing Steroids"
SAN FRANCISCO - Baseball's home run king, Barry Bonds, was his usual witty, charming self as he shrugged off questions regarding his recent indictment by a federal grand jury.Read full story
(2008) Flesh Eating Bug was really 'very sneaky cannibal'
An unnamed man from Nuneaton was speaking about the shock discovery that he was very slowly being eaten by his next door neighbour, Georgia Romero, a hospital anaesthetist, part-time wine-maker and head of the local Chianti society. The revelation...Read full story
(2008) I Got Yule Babe
It has emerged that in the wake of Saddam Hussein's fall from grace, (and the gallows) both warring factions in Iraq have decided to lay down there arms and pick up their microphones to record a cover version of popular 60s song 'I Got You Babe'.Read full story
(2013) Santa Claus & Reindeer All Died Last Year
Although it was kept secret for almost a whole year, Santa Claus and all his reindeer plus three, some say as many as six elves died last year in a terrible accident. It was only when several spy agencies began comparing notes that they finally be...Read full story