In a shock statement released today, it was revealed that former British Prime Minister Tony Blair is the real father of Rupert Murdoch's youngest child after taking part in an immaculate conception ceremony in the Holy land with the Australian Oligarch's wife, Lucy Liu, 42.
The ceremony, held in the little town of Bethlehem, was apparently attended by local shepherds more used to watching their flocks by night, along with various farmyard animals, but not by three wise men. The former PM's cabinet was, however, in full attendance, along with the entire board of Rupert Murdoch's News Corp. A virgin was also supposed to be present, but, unfortunately, Anne Widdecombe got stuck in traffic around the sea of Galilee.
There was no official statement from Tony Blair, but Rupert Murdoch's oriental wife, the star of "Charlie's Angels" and top TV hit "Ally McBeal" stated; "Rupert wanted to keep his legacy of evil going, but at his age he has trouble getting it up. We needed another despotic megalomaniac to take his place, and who better to fill in than Tony Blair?"
The exact details of the conception ceremony, which apparently took place in a remote stable, are unclear, although both Tony Blair and Lucy Liu reported the experience as "highly satisfactory." Cherie Blair was unavailable for comment.