Written by Zachary Estle
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Topics: America, China

Tuesday, 26 July 2011

China sent Obama a letter today that told him to calm down, and that China has no intention whatsoever of buying America.

This is good news for many, who have been worried about China swooping in to claim us as their own like Americans did to the Native Americans. But this may not be as good of news as we thought due to the reasons why they don't want us.

Apparently, the US is now seen as the dunce-cap-wearing, finger-in-nose kid in the back of class that gets to school on the short bus. This is how the world sees us, and it is a stark contrast to the mighty powerhouse that America once was.

How this will affect the global economy will be interesting to think about but for now is pure speculation.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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