During a speech at Westminster on Thursday, Labour MP David Lefty addressed the subject of Anglo-Canadian relations.
"For years," Lefty remarked "Canada had a special place in our hearts as a a place that was a bit like America, but without the tendency to elect Ronald Reagan, twat on about abortion or lapse into knee-jerk racism"
"However", he continued "recently it has been clear that Canada has given up years of liberal thought and gone a bit right-wing. What's the fucking point of that?"
Lefty pointed to research which clearly shows that if both Canada and the USA are going to agree with idiots who spout on in the manner of Michele Bachmann, then Canada loses out because it's colder, more boring and has fewer theme parks.
Canada also has a tendency to get just a bit French if you accidentally stray into the wrong bit.
Lefty did concede, that like most hippies, he was fond of Neil Young.
The speaker of the house then rose to his feet to point out that the Canadian Army are as hard as fucking nails,dug us out of two world wars and are still chosen by the UN as first in line to sort out the mess in absolute shitholes. He also pointed out that the Mounties do always get their man, and Canadian Hockey players are apparently pain-immune mentalists.
The speaker concluded his response by observing that if Canada wished to come round and "talk" to Lefty personally about his views, he, the speaker, would like to point out he had nothing to do with them.