The Dalai Lama, his Holiness Tenzin Gyatso, has taken the radical option of changing his name by deed poll.
From now on, he wants everyone throughout the world to refer to him simply as "Norman from Tibet".
Speaking to news reporters and those people from the Sun who make things up as they go along without referring to the actual facts, he said that his name was causing a "double whammy of embarrassment" comparable only to David Cameron and Nick Clegg, although not as embarrassing as "train" and "fare" and certainly not even the slightest bit as embarrassing as "Fred Shred Goodwin" and "Pension".
He did admit that "Nick" and "Griffin" was perhaps the single most embarrassing thing he had ever come across, more so even than the time many, many years ago when he caught his 14-year old brother lying on the sofa with no trousers, a box of Kleenex and a picture of a half-naked Brigitte Bardot.
He said that he had become totally fed-up with people thinking he was a furry animal prone to spitting. And his original given surname - Gyatso - sounded too much for comfort like a British local council revenue camera.