Written by Steddyeddy
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Friday, 15 April 2011

image for World's oldest woman dies at 145 after visiting the moon
Quite an old woman

Reports have reached the world through the British red-top tabloid press that the world's oldest woman, Mary Quite-Contrary has died in Somerset, England at 145, just after visiting the Moon.

Lauded by millions of people as the word's oldest woman, Mary passed away quietly at home at a quarter to two (145) local time, aged 101. She had just arrived home having left the Moon public house following a family wedding.

The police don't suspect foul play, as Mrs Quite-Contrary was a vegetarian. However, it is thought that, after examining the television and satellite TV box in her living room, her death was caused by waiting for the recent plot-line in the BBC1 soap "EastEnders" to finish, but seeing no end to it, she simply died of boredom.

Her son, Nigel Bates-Quite-Contrary, grandson Philip Smith-Bates-Quite-Contrary and great-grandson Oliver Newton-Smith-Bates-Quite-Contrary were said to be reviewing their rather stupid habit of adding a hyphenated name each time they got married.

It is expected that now Mrs Quite-Contrary has passed away, there is the likelihood that her family may arrange her funeral and that she may end up in the ground somewhere, more than likely a graveyard, although she did express a wish to be buried at sea and have the President of Iran walk on her grave.

Make Steddyeddy's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 plus 4?

1 6 3 24
105 readers are online right now!

Go to top