Tokyo - UPDATE 5 The toddler previously reported as having neutron beam shrunken parents has suffered an horrendous overdose of radioactive aspartame.
According to Tokyo General Prefecture Hospital, the boy was given five cases of aspartame by American GIs. The aspartame was carried on a US Navy vessel which went through a radioactive cloud - radioactive at 10 million times normal radiation, which affected the aspartame. This made the aspartame 10,000,000 times sweeter than regular aspartame, and 100,000,000 times as toxic as regular aspartame.
The boy is in grave condition, is glowing a faint green color, and exuding a sickeningly sweet smell.